Is "female" offensive?
I am not a native English speaker and I have sometimes referred to people as male and female (as that is what I have been taught) but I have received some backlash in some cases, especially for the word "female", is there some negative thought in the word which I am unaware of?
I don't know if this is the best place to ask, if it's not appropriate I have no problem to delete it ^^
Female as an adjective is perfectly fine.
A female patient, a female politician, a female customer, etc. That's the best way to refer to those.
What's bad is using 'female' as a noun: "A female. "
In general, you just don't use adjectives-as-nouns to refer to people. You don't call someone "a gay", "a black", or "a Chinese". That is offensive, and "a female" has the same kind of feel.
(there are exceptions to the above: you can call someone 'an American' or 'A German", but not "A French". I don't understand why - if you can't feel your way, best just avoid it)
Now, you could get around it by calling someone "a female person" - except that we already have a word for "female person", and that's "woman". And to go out of your way to avoid saying "woman" makes you sound like some kind of incel weirdo, and you don't want that.
And to go out of your way to avoid saying “woman” makes you sound like some kind of incel weirdo, and you don’t want that.
I'd just like to emphasise this. It's not that using a different term is intrinsically bad, it's just that the people who tend to do it are not cool and you don't want to look like you're associated with them.
When I was growing up, saying woman was offensive, because it made people feel old. So we would say "girl". But now It's flipped. Saying "girl" makes people feel too young, apparently.
I'm still kind of adjusting. The word "woman" still feels icky to me because I was berated for saying it as a kid.
It's ridiculous that a perfectly fine word is seen as insult used by a certain type of people.
Meanwhile, you are perfectly ok with judging someone based uniquely on which term they tend to use? Oh my, mankind is really going down the drain…
Interesting point with adjectives vs nouns.
'a Frenchman' would be more correct than 'a French'. Because French is only an adjective, while American and German are both nouns and adjectives. But Frenchman is not gender neutral like German or American.
Could go with Francophone, but that's any french speaking person so that includes canadians, africans, etc.
And, it would seem to make sense to go with Frank, but the Franks were originally germans, then expanded their territory to include France, and the name stuck there but not in their original territory, so is it really correct to refer to the French as Franks? Since no one does it, I would guess not.
except that we already have a word for "female person", and that's "woman". And to go out of your way to avoid saying "woman" makes you sound like some kind of incel weirdo
Sounds more like a terf or "gender critical" person, but maybe that's just my experience.
Fair.
Unless you're a ferengi. /s
I think a big part that's skeevy to me is that gender and sex are comparatively unimportant individual traits, referring to someone by their gender happens far more often for women and it's a hold over of misogyny. There are much more interesting individual traits that identify us than our sex or presented gender.
You can soften "a black" or "a Chinese" entirely by adding "person" to the end of it. English is weird.
Right, because that makes it an adjective.
That's werid because in french that's not what we use in everyday life. We say "Un japonais" for example, not "Une personne japonaise" which kinda sounds unnecessary
My wife tells me that using as an adjective is just as bad and that I should always say "woman", e.g. a woman politician and never a female politician.
I generally disagree and it seems fine and not disrespectful at all. But it's somehat less up to me - I'm not a female.
My wife tells me that using as an adjective is just as bad and that I should always say “woman”, e.g. a woman politician and never a female politician.
Using a noun as an adjective is just weird, honestly.
I think that a good rule of thumb is: would you say “male doctor” or “male politician”? If not, is the professional’s gender relevant? Probably not, in which case it sounds pejorative to include it.
"the suspect is a six foot, white male"
Sounds fine to me
"I was just visiting my friend, a six foot white male"
A little weirder. Context is everything.
I think that's because the descriptors come after the noun in reporting. Similar to how documentation is done for other professions, like healthcare. If it's out of the context of reporting, or other situations listed in the site below, it sounds grammatically strange or rude.
https://myenglishgrammar.com/lessons/adjectives-function-as-nouns/
Source: I'm in healthcare.
Because the police never try to dehumanize "suspects" and "perpetrators".
Cops (ACAB) are not a good example for moral treatment of others.
Now, you could get around it by calling someone "a female person" - except that we already have a word for "female person", and that's "woman".
I'm going to nitpick a touch. "Female person" includes girls. "Women" ecludes them.
And that's why I say "bruh"
I'm probably the only person to not use that word like a frat douche, I just like calling my guy friends bro and I tried calling my female friends bro and they didn't find that funny so now everyone gets bruh'd
there are exceptions to the above: you can call someone 'an American' or 'A German", but not "A French". I don't understand why - if you can't feel your way, best just avoid it
And yet here you are confidently expounding exactly how this works. Why, if you know you don’t understand, are you weighing in on this like you’re an authority on it?
Because fluent speakers of a language know the rules even if they don't understand them. Why can you have a big green dog but not a green big dog? Because that's the way the language works.
Tbh I think it's just because it sounds bad phonetically, since "a Frenchman" or "an Englishman" are both acceptable as well, but "a French" or "An English" just sounds dumb. Of course you can only do that to white countries, don't try it with China.
Oh dear… And why isn’t “a male” just as bad? And what’s intrinsically wrong about those two as a noun? Why is it ok to call someone “a fire fighter“, “a journalist”, and not “a female”? Is it something to feel shame about? Bah. It’s really beyond me. Thank god i live in Italy, where this kind of stuff still struggles to gain traction, but alas it will do eventually, since hey, you know, we’re all living in america after all. What’s more, it’s not entirely true: now you can get scolded even for using female as an adjective (it happened to me more than once), my friend. And it’ll get worse, just you wait and see.
And why isn’t “a male” just as bad?
It is.
And what’s intrinsically wrong about those two as a noun?
Because you're reducing people to their characteristics of identity.
Why is it ok to call someone “a fire fighter“, “a journalist”, and not “a female”?
Because those are characteristics of their chosen functions.
It seems pretty easy to me, and I'm not even a native speaker.
"I had coffee with one of the males at work"
"There's a male waiting for you downstairs"
"I need to see a male about a dog"
All of them would be weird as fuck, and yes, they'd sound demeaning. They don't have the same weird-incel vibe, but that's just an accident of culture.
Typical male behavior!
There's no reason for you to feel attacked by the previous sentence, right?
Not really offensive on its own, but it carries a reductive and dehumanizing vibe, depending on how it's used. And the ones who use "female" instead of "woman" are often incels and/or misogynists, giving the term a bad conotation.
Also, Ferengis...
I always think of the ferengis when people use men to describe men, and females to describe women.
this! an example of someone always using it in a such a way is Andrew Tate. watch any of his videos where he mentions girls and you'll immediately understand
Episode is so stupid, I can't not laugh.
Jeez, mark that NSFW please
It’s potentially offensive when people say men and females, which is often why it comes up online. Using either male or female as a noun is dehumanizing, in that it’s not commonly used to refer to people, but mostly animals (law enforcement and military use them as nouns, but they’re also intentionally distancing themselves from the people in reports).
Basically, “women” feels weird for a lot of English speakers, but “girls” sounds creepy, so they try for something else. Just go with women, 99% of the time, it’s perfectly fine
It's mostly this, I would say. But in general there's a valid context to use male/female and another valid context to use man/woman or girl/boy or lady/gentleman.
Most people are not going to hold someone speaking English as a second language to task over it. But if you're speaking natively, there's no real excuse not to know when it is right to use the correct term.
But that's just my own opinion.
“women” feels weird for a lot of English speakers
Why does it feel weird? (not a native speaker here)
Because there’s no good equivalent to “guys” for women, and women often feels too old/formal. If I’m talking about a group of 19 year olds, then they are women and men (and there’s no good word for NB adults, other than “adults,” that I can think of, either), but 19 year olds still feel younger than women and men. “Guy” is any age and denotes a peer or relaxed relationship, but “woman” and “man” don’t have those connotations. I would talk about the man who works at the bank and the guy who works at the coffee shop, as an indicator of familiarity, if that helps. If you speak a language with a formal you and an informal you, it feels like a similar distinction to me, though those are also all different.
“Guys” can refer to groups of women, and I definitely call my sisters guys, but if you talk about “a guy,” it isn’t gender neutral where I’m from.
“Lady” singular denotes age, but not formality, though the formality difference between “lady” and “ladies” is hard (I could absolutely see someone saying “some lady was an absolute asshole at the gas station today,” but “two ladies were absolute assholes at the gas station,” is weird).
woman reads as "wo-man"
women reads as "we-men"
English is weird. I blame the British.
Just say ladies. That's polite.
I’m torn here. It’s a good way for me to talk about my peers (early thirties) in the third person, but it doesn’t quite fit for second person for me. (Edit: ”guy” is also not great for second person, now that I think about it, so maybe it’s more equivalent than I realized. Though for plural third person, it still isn’t 1:1, imo. “Two guys in my class” has a different connotation from “two ladies in my class,” but I can’t put my finger on why.)
“Ladies” feels formal/salesy (if someone addresses a group of women I’m in as “ladies,” it feels like they’re either a server for our group dinner or trying to quickly build rapport) to me, whereas “lady” can often feel straight up rude ( “hey, lady!” sounds like Bart Simpson said it vs. “hey, ladies!” which could mean so many different things depending on the context, but seems less annoyed at least).
While generally true, there are some people from older generations that associate ladies with prostitution as in 'ladies of the night' and find it offensive.
Yes, I have known quite a few and they are in their 60s to 80s right now.
What about when specifying the gender of your friend? "My woman friend" sounds really weird to me. I usually say, "my female friend" because it sounds more natural, but I don't want to sound like an incel/misogynist.
For what it's worth, I say "my male friend" as well.
Nonono, it’s always okay to use it as an adjective, so that’s fine!
As a non-native speaker I find woman more offensive than female. Noun male/female puts all as equal. Girls, boys, birds, ponies. Woman, though, seems to be de-attached. Especially when talking about humankind it’s common to refer to humans as just „man”. „No man been there”, „for all mankind”, „dog is a man’s best friend”. As it applies to man only and woman doesn’t count
This just seems women are more touchy about this stuff then men.
Someone called me out on reddit for using the word girls for women and it was sexist because it is infantising, and it was stupid because they were making out I don't call men boys. When I absoultely do, in fact I do it more than the alternative. Really the only way I was sexist on that is that I don't do it as much as I do with men so if anything I should do it more.
But you can't win, someone's always going to be offended
Context is important. If I say: "Sexual dimorphism is when a species has two distinct sexes, male and female," I dont think many would find that rude. Now, if I say "Im so sick of females telling me what to do" you might get some cocked eyebrows.
The way I explained it to a chronically single friend who used this word problematically all the time, and made him stop: Female is a word that describes gender and/or sex. My wife is female, and so is my dog. My wife is literally a woman, and my dog is literally a removed, so if I speak of my wife with the same sterile language that I speak of my dog, then my wife would easily conclude that I have no respect for her. I then asked him how the dating world was treating him, he said "bad", and I said "of course, because you treat women like dogs".
Never heard him say it again.
This is a good way of describing it for non-US or non-native speakers. The context is important. If you are speaking in an environment where linguistic sterility or pedantic exactitude are paramount, use female because that is the correct term. Things like studies; medical, statistical, anthropological, etc. If you are in a social situation, use a non-sterile term like woman for an adult, girl for a child, or some other non-pejorative colloquial term. If "chick" or "dame" or "babe" are acceptable to the girls/women of the social circle, go wild with them, if not, don't. This is viable advice for any pronoun or colloquial reference, no matter the gender/sex of the people around. Their emotions matter.
Also, if you are speaking with physists about physics, object pronouns become appropriate because no matter how offended people get, they have a volume and warp spacetime, so therefore they ARE objects. 🙃
It really depends on the context. When used as an adjective, it's fine. For example, the sentence "My female coworker has brown hair." is correct. However, when it is used as a noun, it can be dehumanising. For example: "A female at my workplace has brown hair" is dehumanising. It can be used as a noun when talking about non-humans ("After mating, the female will lay her eggs.") or in medicinal context when referring to people with uteruses.
Not English native here, please don't be too harsh for asking this.
I've heard male very often as noun, and doesn't seem to have a negative reaction. Is one "generally" considered worse to use than the other?
Yeah it's tricky. Using "female" as a noun in a non-biological context is often used by incels and misogynists in order to dehumanise women. Whereas there isn't the same trend of certain groups using "male" to dehumanise men, or at least I've never heard of it happening in real life.
In a vacuum, both would be the same, but because there is a much larger trend of using "female" to dehumanise women than using "male" to dehumanise men, it's not a true double-standard.
And as long as you're not being a dick, especially if English isn't your native language, then people will know what you mean. But if you are consciously trying to make an effort, then don't use "female" and "male" as nouns to refer to someone's gender.
A lot of the reason why "Female" has a bit of a negative slant, is because of the kinds of people/communities that overused the word.
Those groups used female as a way to say that women are only useful as somewhere to put your dick. There didn't really seem to be a group using male in a dehumanizing way, so it doesn't really have the same negative feeling.
Kinda like how if someone just comments "Jew" on a post it can feel negative, but if they say "Canadian" or "Bulgarian" it feels neutral.
Can you give some examples?
Using human nonspecific terminology to describe women is dehumanizing. They are women, not "females". The only people who use "female" as a noun mean it the same way they might call a woman a "hoe". It's a word you use when you deliberately want to minimize the existence of another person. Literally referring to a woman like she is an object, or livestock...
That you shouldn't call a human woman "a female"?
It's super context dependent. Asking "How do I ask a woman out?" Vs "How do I ask a female out?" say very different things about you.
It’s kind of like the difference between talking about people who are black and referring to someone as “one of the blacks”. It’s subtle, but the latter is objectifying where as the former is descriptive.
It’s even more subtle than that. We’ve defeated most actual injustice in our society, and now people are scraping the bottom of the barrel to find injustice to fight against.
I have some bad news to tell you about capitalism
hmmm, that's an assessment I can't get behind, lol
This is the dumbest thing I've read this year.
Using it as an adjective in some cases is fine, never use it as a noun, unfortunately due to assholes using it that way it now has a negative conotation.
exactly this
It sounds fairly scientific in a crunchy or incel way. As others have highlighted here, there are times it can be used, but generally, I'd stick to "women" or "ladies" for most situations. It flows better and avoids potentially negative connotations. That said, if english isn't your native language, I'd expect native speakers to cut you some slack; english can be a difficult language to learn, and the language is always evolving, particularly around gendered language right now. Sounds like you are putting the effort into learning it, though :)
Typically it does flow better, but I have a little mental stumble every time someone uses "woman" or "women" as an adjective. I know why they're doing it and I can't really fault them, it just... feels off.
It’s an adjective not a noun when talking about people. The sort of people who use it as a noun tend to be misogynists and so when people do it they’re often unknowingly writing with a misogynist accent if that makes sense.
Mostly just by association. It sounds very incel-y.
And the infamously misogynistic Ferengi.
Humons just don't understand Ferengi culture.
"I have a female friend." (As in "I have a friend that's a woman.") "I've talked with a female today." (As in "I've talked with a woman today.")
The first one is fine, because isn't using the word as an adjective. The second one is derogatory, because it is being used as a substantive.
So stating a fact is derogatory?
Where the fuck do y'all get your information?
Found the incel lol
Lmao this incel can't stop commenting in here 😂
What do you mean by facts? How is female defined by you? Because I doubt you genetically test for XX chromosomes before you say female, right?
I think there are plenty of words that can be factual, but also unkind. And that is all that this is about. I would at the very least find it odd if someone used "human specimen" instead of calling me a man, though it is factual. I think trying to use the words that describe people the way they see themselves instead of hanging onto some logical ideal is a normal transition languages make over time and is a kinder way to be.
When used as a noun they're how you refer to non-human animals so when you use them for people it sounds that you don't think men/women are human
Male and female are biological terms. Mostly "man/woman" are more appropriate unless you're specifically talking about biological sex. Particularly since a certain bunch of people is now using "females" with a bit of underlying vitriol, it'd be a good idea to stay away from it.
What is a good term when you don't want to exclude minors who are not yet women, like six year olds?
'Women and girls' seems awkward when talking about sports leagues for people of all ages who are female. "_______ sports are treated as second class by being given the additional description of girl's or women's when the sports played by men and boys is just the name of the sport." is pretty clunky, especially if there are multiple examples that need clarity on which gender's sport is being described.
I'd sneak a peek at some other league and do whatever they did.
When I say "avoid using 'female'" (specifically as a noun to mean "woman") it's not an absolute. The gist is just to not come off like a fedora-tipping twat. Sometimes it's used intentionally to objectify or demean "females" in general, or using the "woman/female" distinction as some sort of pointed transphobic shtick.
It's still a perfectly cromulent word as long as it doesn't get neckbeardy.
The biggest rule of thumb is to be consistent between the genders.
So if you say "men's and boys' leagues", then say "women's and girls' leagues", not "females' leagues".
The problem is the "Men and females" phenomenon (even when implied), not the word itself.
male/female usually used for animals, for humans usage of man/woman would be the right way
I disagree. Male/female is used plenty with humans, but it tends to be used in a more clinical or 'objective' manner, such as in legal documents, autopsy reports, police suspect descriptions, things of that sort.
I think the use of, e.g., "Look at those four males over there", it has a bit of a connotation of separation of the personhood of the people involved. A man is a living, thinking being; he is worthy of dignity, and he has a soul. A 'male' can almost be called an 'it': it has a characterization of cold, scientific classification.
A ‘male’ can almost be called an ‘it’: it has a characterization of cold, scientific classification.
But that's the issue: its dehumanizing and that's done intentionally. The use case you mention seems to just be an extension of its usage for livestock rather than an exception. But its an exception to it being used in a misogynistic way while still being a noun.
Don't bring science to feminism!
Humans are animals though. Why do they get offended when they get reminded of that fact? Smh, this is why us members of the galactic community don't like your species too much. /S
Kinda like how ignorant people only thing humans have consciousness while more and more studies show capability in many animals
Maybe that's how you animals in your "galactic community" operate, but be careful... a lot of people in these parts eat animals for breakfast. For your own self preservation you might want to come up with some reasons why you're more than just an animal before we get to barbecue season.
Depends entirely on how you use it. There are many perfectly valid uses for the word, like in science or on a checkbox where you select your gender. The point where it can get offensive is when referring to individuals or groups of women as "females" where you could instead just use "women". It's language often used by incels and the like.
The problem is using it when "woman" is the correct word. If you say stuff like "the female at the customer service desk doesn't know how to do her job" then you run the risk of being called an incel or ferengi, though if you don't seem like a sexist, churchy, or maga-hatter, then you can probably get away with it by not sounding like a native speaker. Or just avoid all that like me and don't talk to people because social interactions of any kind are mentally draining.
Some people think it's dehumanizing. As an adjective, it's more acceptable ("There is a female nurse"); it sounds a bit off-putting as a noun ("The nurse is a female"). There are some people who don't like to use it at all, and that leads to awkward things like using "woman" as an adjective ("There is a woman nurse")!
You're probably okay as long as you stick to using it as an adjective, but you still might offend some people.
This is what I said to someone who asked a very similar question about the same thing a while back:
'Females' is, effectively, a 'technical term' you might say, that isn't used in normal conversation. It's used specifically in situations where distance from the subject being discussed is intentional. It is the sort of language used in police reports, medical reports and the like...when it's even being applied to humans at all. Its use is perhaps more common referring to animals; it's the sort of terminology you'd expect to hear in a nature documentary.
The people trying to push its use are intending to make the subjects - women - sound 'other' and separate and alien by referring to them as 'females'. Not everyone who is picking up this terminology intends it that way, but the connotations are unavoidable because of how language works in common use, and therefore if you don't intend it that way, you badly need to be made aware of it so you can stop.
I guess it would be kind of like referring to another person as "human".
"Hey who helped you with this?”
"This human over here, my co-worker."
it's supposed to be an adjective (female dog, female human, etc.) but people who want to reduce people to nothing but their sex will use it as a noun.
I'd say it's off-putting for the same reason that using technically accurate biological terminology in place of sexy-talk can be off-putting. It could come off as impersonal or alien at best, and objectifying at worst.
Think of an alien in disguise saying "hello fellow humans". Technically, it's not wrong, it's just weird.
I think it's because it's mostly used by "sigma male" seing womens as objects(not sure thought, but that's what i've seen).
If you say "This female" vs. "This woman", it could be considered very rude. English is very context dependent.
I'd say it's a tone and context sorta thing.
Definitely.
[NOT OKAY] "Hey guys, check out those females!"
[Okay.] "There were seventy-five males and sixty females in the study."
[NOT OKAY] "Gonna go out with my favourite females tonight" (unless you're a girl in a girls night out and doing a comedic take on the bro culture)
[Okay] "The shoplifter was ~170cm tall, female, wore large sunglasses and ran surprisingly fast for someone in such high heels smelling so strongly of chardonnay"
Others in this thread will tell you it's only acceptable as an adjective or for animals. That's not true. Here are some non-adjective uses that most people wouldn't consider misogynistic on the surface:
That said, "I am a single man looking for a female" is pretty gross usage. Also, please note that some of these examples may be transphobic in nature.
I just went to a Women's Day film festival where females were talking about females while using the word "female" all day.
I'm pretty sure people are way overreacting to it. In the end it's just context and tone. "Women" can be just as derogatory depending on how you say it.
Can you give us more context?
"Woman" is almost always preferred because it respects one's personal identity, as opposed to the compulsory status of biological sex, which is often used as a source of belittlement and/or bigotry against women. (and carries a whole plethora of baggage when people decide they get to judge someone's female-ness)
But it doesn't mean that you shouldn't generally be able to use the term "female" without causing social friction, if you have a good amount of social grace.
(its actually quite normal in fantasy/scifi circles, for example)
I think you may be asking the wrong question- you may want to explain what you were talking about and ask what specific phrases or situations might have unsettled people.
Maybe it was just a weirdly specific English faux pas, or maybe you have a friend who is a little extra sensitive after bad experiences and who could use your support. Maybe its a total miscommunication- who knows?
I mean I'm not exactly offended by it, but if someone uses it that's a "note to self, this person is most likely misogynist" moment for sure.
Yeah, its a red flag.
They indicate potential problems, which is why you look for multiple, but even one obvious one is enough to make you a bit cautious, it makes sense.
But if its someone I know, and who isn't a native English speaker and is pretty chill, I'm probably going to let it slide for a couple uses, then gently ask them why they're using a certain term in a nice pause in the conversation.
I'm lucky to have had friends from lots of other places, but it can make things so awkward with corrections, even if it has to be done.
But people can absolutely wind up learning horrendously out of date language without meaning any malice. I've seen it happen because of confusion regarding the existence of the NAACP, and the use of the term, "People of Color."
The way OP is talking makes it sound like he could likely talk it out with the other people, and I think that may be the best option. (though I can understand why they may want some insight from the internet first)
One place where it makes sense to use the word female as a noun is when an individual word like "woman" doesn't work. For instance, if there are girls and women together, neither "women" nor "girls" is appropriate. In that case, I think "female" is the only option. I'd be happy to hear if anyone has an alternative.
Anything can be offensive in the corresponding context.
I mean, I didn't know "orange" could be offensive, but then Trump showed up.
Saying 'female' to refer to a person who is female can sound overly technical or abstracted, and therefore a bit dehumanizing or depersonalizing.
That said, some people over-react, and sometimes it is more appropriate or at least fine to say 'female', for example if you were speaking in the abstract about something that spans between women and girls, or is specifically about biological sex.
But most of the time 'women' or 'girls' or even 'ladies' is going to be more appropriate.
What language are you coming from, out of curiosity?
Everything is offensive to someone.
It's dehumanizing. Use woman, girl, person.
I personally would always prefer saying boy girl man woman over male and female. Whener I first saw it used it was always in a negative context like "young black male" in regard to some crime to give the opposite example. Just like in French I think it's weird to refer to humans with male and female, although accurate of course, as I would only expect it in for animals.
Many people consider it dehumanizing. Others interpret as a signal of at least insensitivity and at most conscious dehumanizing. It can feel threatening outside certain specific contexts and that depends much on how much you trust the person saying it.
I find it outmoded and jarring. I know people who say it as part of everyday speech and I trust them but I'd prefer it if they spoke differently and I think they're projecting an image worse than they merit.
I don't call things offensive or not, because that oversimplifies the matter. I would find "male" and "female" useful as nouns when I want to refer to biological sex specifically and not confuse it with gender. I would also find the adjectives "manly" and "womanly" useful to refer to gender instead of using "male" and "female". But as long as enough other people feel threatened by some of those words in a neutral context where they don't already trust me, it seems wise to me to be aware of that and not use those words that way.
The whole idea of saying "a white" instead of "a white man" is merely a habit we picked up from Latin, anyway.
I understand your pain. My home language doesn't even have separate words for woman and female, or male and man.
How do you refer to a female animal?
What language, if you don’t mind me asking? I’m interested in linguistics and this seems like an interesting tangent.
not OP but in Polish there is no word for boyfriend or girlfriend, you just say boy or girl which is kinda funny. however because Polish has grammatical gender, you can say boy friend/girl friend and even enby friend, thanks to neoforms! (przyjaciel, przyjaciółka, przyjacioło)
though note that partner is also gendered (partner, partnerka, partnerze)
It's as offensive as "black" is. If you call someone female that's fine. If you call someone a female, you're going to look like an incel.
It’s dehumanizing.
Like when the cops are on the lookout for a six foot white male, it’s okay because cops dehumanize their suspects as a matter of course.
Female as an adjective is inoffensive everywhere, but you will run into problems in some contexts because its definition is currently in flux and different people will mean different things by it.
Female as a noun has the same changing definition deal, and also some online misogynists use it as a pejorative. It isn't one, but they use it as one. As a corollary, some others on the internet have chosen to be offended by the term.
This explains it pretty well https://callmebymygender.top/
Explains it well for adults, but it doesn't give cover children or groups that include children and adults.
Not with proper hygiene.
The basic rule of thumb is that anyone who gets upset with you using the word female isn't worth your time. If they're really going to get upset about you using the word female then they're probably going to get upset about a lot of other trivial things as well and that's not the sort of negativity and bitterness you want in your life.
People that say 'females' out loud in public are quickly assumed to never get laid. It's okay to use when talking or writing about science topics and such.
Let me break down the explanations given, because most of them boil down to this:
As a noun, yes, because it's mainly used in biology like that ("A hawk female") and thus can come off as dehumanizing. As an adjective: No ("A female cashier", "A male cashier")
Friend, people will get offended by anything and everything. Didn't worry about it. You just be you.
I've switched to Lady for a lot of descriptors that I used to use Female. And a lot more They. Or just a physical description, like the person with the dark hair.
Edit: I'm probably trying harder than I need to. I just want to accommodate people.
How about: "The weaker sex" instead?
How about "the fairer sex"?
It’s not negative per se , but quite impolite, not least because a woman is so much more than her gender.
No.
You can use it to compare humans with animals. It is often used in animal documentaries. You can use female/male as a name in general. Then you have it very clear in a little bit insulting style. On the other hand it's not really insulting and nobody can expect from a second or third language guy to speak in a non-offensive style like US- or UK establishment people like to do. This would be racism. 🤡
Nope. Next.
Ignore the idiots. We non native speakers are graceful enough to attempt to talk with them politely, that is more than enough. Appeasing snowflakes is not my goal.
As a native speaker, I approve of your opinion.
It depends on if you’re handsome or not
Learn what consent is and then have your mom sign you up for therapy.
As far as I'm concerned. No not a problem.
If someone says they identify as something else then make the correction.
I feel like a lot of answers here are dancing around why people find it offensive without really addressing it.
As an adjective "female" is completely fine to distinguish between genders when applied to humans. As in "a female athlete" or when a form asks you to select "male" or "female" (ideally with additional options "diverse" and "prefer not to answer").
Where it's problematic is when it's used as a noun. In English "a male" and "a female" is almost exclusively reserved for animals. For humans we have "a man" and "a woman". Calling a person "a female" is often considered offensive because it carries the implication of women being either animals, property or at least so extremely different from the speaker that they don't consider them equal. This impression is reinforced by the fact that the trend of calling women "females" is popular with self-proclaimed "nice guys" who blame women for not wanting to date them when in reality it's their own behavior (for example calling women "females") that drives potential partners away.
So in itself, the word "female" is just as valid as "male" and in some contexts definitely the right word to use but the way it has been used gives it a certain negative connotation.
But also important to remember that quite a bunch of people are note native speakers without the feeling for finer distinctions in meaning. Like for me, since I learned english mostly in a scientific setting, those words habe little negative connotation on their own. They became negative co-notated through the use of misogynistic communities.
Yeah, I definitely wouldn't judge someone who doesn't know better. I'm not a native speaker myself. I just wanted to clarify as good as I can because it seems like OP wants to make an honest effort to use it correctly.
Yeah, seems like a more recent thing. Like if there were a bunch of varying ages then I'd just go males or females, but because of how meanings change I just don't use it anymore to not even risk the chance of offending someone. If they find it offensive than who am I to say it isn't. So I just removed it from my vocab outside of science, since I don't want to deal with the drama.
Speaking of non-native speakers. This is a phrase that's clear enough and makes complete sense, but does come across as quite clunky and unnatural to a native English speaker. I couldn't articulate why exactly, but "a bunch" doesn't really take "quite" quite as well as some other similar words. "Quite a few", or "a bunch" (without the quite) would have worked better here. Or just "many", which is probably what I would have gone with.
Honestly, anyone who can speak a second language has a better grasp of what a noun and an adjective are than yer average English speaker. They're just at risk of picking up colloquialisms from the manosphere, if they hang around in the wrong kinds of places.
I mean you could argue americans aren't native speakers either. But on the other hand, they did what the british wanted to but couldn't, purge much of the french from their language.
Great explanation! Spot on.
I think you got this mostly dead on but I don't know about it being because anyone thinks women are animals. I do believe the part you wrote about it being about difference/distance is correct though. In fact I think cops refer to suspects as male or female for the same reason. Man and woman sound nothing alike and are easier to say, so there must be some reason not to use those words. I think they say male or female to create distance between them, and not a person, but a gendered wrongdoer. That way they can apply any and all force without feeling as bad about it
This one is interesting because in the military it was pretty much the norm to use male or female for everyone, but in that case it wasn’t so much about distance as minimizing differences, as in everyone is a soldier or airmen first (sort of like comrade). I wonder if some of the police use comes from the relatively high number of veterans or the wannabe military stuff that the police have, or if they feel like it seems more professional.
Well, the assholes that use ‘female’ like op described think we’re shoes, locks, purses, sandwiches, androids…
Animal would be a step up, really. At least that’s something that’s alive.
Male & female are sexes, not genders.
Can you explain the difference? Aren't genders another way of saying their biological sex?
In any society where male roles and female roles differ (e.g. fathers play ball with their kids; mothers teach their kids to sew), male and female are also genders in addition to being sexes. What else would you call these genders?
They're both.
::: spoiler Discussion of offensive racial language
There's a similar distinction with "black" in regards to race. Referring to someone as a black person or people as black folks is largely acceptable. Referring to someone as a "black" or people as "blacks" on the other hand sounds old fashioned at best and actively dehumanizing at worst.
Voyager has spoilers! It’s not in the markdown toolbar yet but if you know the syntax it works
::: spoiler spoiler goes here
Hi there
Tangentially to the discussion at hand, I think what we're running into with females being used in social-level discourse is the hunt for an inoffensive way to describe a potential mate, and to differentiate that word from the more general word.
When I was a kid, chick and all the other overtly misogynistic terms were going out of fashion. Later girls had some time in the spotlight, now it's females.
One group is looking for a way to politely describe a concept that the other considers inherently inappropriate or offensive.
I don't think females has ever been used by males to describe a potential partner of the opposite sex, except for groups of males that are notorious for their misogyny. While yeah there's been a bunch of different terms tried over the decades women was always on the table. It's kinda telling that it's been uncomfortable for some males for so long, especially since it's the easiest choice.