I was handed this lovely flyer while grocery shopping

Did they just photocopy a flyer that was photocopied by someone else? Because this looks like it was about 15 steps from the original printing. Also, why hand these out now?

Sounds about right for these folks. Anytime you see an email like this it's always FW: FW: FW: FW: FW: FW: the Illuminati KILLED MY DOG with COVID masks!
- The Bavarian Illuminati?
Reminds me of a line in Futurama:
Fry: Over there a crazy guy used to hand out a socialist newsletter
Bender: Was it poorly Xeroxed?
Fry: Oh, you better believe it!
- I once got a full color, too many graphics, tiny writing to fit it all on one full page flyer about how doritos is made with human stem cells. I've got it in a file somewhere because it was so weird I couldn't throw it out. And yes, some of the graphics were of the flavoring fetuses.
"Needs more jpg" - retro edition
They photocopied a wet copy lmao it has spills . Unless that’s OP
- OP was just laughing with tears, that is why it is stained
- Rookie mistake of not drying the counter off after doing the dishes.
- looks like OP cause its all the way to the edge of the paper
Did they just photocopy a flyer that was photocopied by someone else? Because this looks like it was about 15 steps from the original printing.
Some nutcases do things old school. Respect.

Have they been subject to medium to long term safety testing on humans?

Yes. For over two years now. Using a population of hundreds of millions of people and a control population of people who xerox misinformation and hand it out to strangers in grocery stores.

News flash: the vaccinated ones are doing way better.

As an addendum, the idea that a vaccine can produce side effects years down the line is a myth. A vaccine is a one-time payload - if any side effects are going to crop up, they will inevitably be in the few weeks following vaccination as your body processes it. After that, if nothing has gone awry, you're good.
- My 5G mobile coverage improves about 7 days after my annual shot.
  I figure by 2027 I can ditch my home router.
- As an addendum addendum, I have some news for people worried about long-term effects of encountering only the spike proteins: you're really going to hate the long-term effects from taking that virus raw.
Using a population of ~~hundreds of millions~~ billions
Billions of people were vaccinated. Hardly anything happened.
- I remember being told everyone vaccinated would be dead within six months.
  It's been a very long six months.
  Similarly, I don't hear climate change deniers talking about the solar cycle anymore...
- Did billions of people end up getting the mRNA vaccine? I thought the traditional vaccine was more widely deployed outside the United States.
  In any case, the objection is nonsense. On populations this large, the number of side effects was slightly less than might have been expected at the outset. The researchers did good work.
Or, y'know, literal decades (centuries?) by medical professionals
- For vaccines in general, yes. But kooky people that think this is some kind of trick are worried about it being an mRNA vaccine, which is indeed somewhat new. The idea has been around for about fifty years, but the first human clinical trials were only about a decade ago and COVID was the first large-scale human deployment.
  Now, in fairness, they were almost entirely ready at the time. I would imagine, without COVID, we probably would've still seen mRNA vaccines become mainstream already, though maybe last year or this year instead of in 2021. But COVID stepped up the final stages of approval significantly.

Funny how surgeons don't seem to have the problems this flyer describes.
And I better not open this person's closet and find a single scarf.

How anyone can still believe this shit just confounds me.

Not funny once you realize all doctors are actually lizard people in human skin suits performing experiments on us. QED sucker!
House painters don't have the problems this flyer describes.

I have a dead uncle because of these nonsense theories he refused to wear a mask, social distance etc. The inevitable happened and he passed from covid within a week. All because of anonymous people on Facebook who I will never meet, and will never suffer the consequences of their actions. Makes me so angry

A friends mom was snowboarding with her grandkids the year before covid. His sister, a pharmacist btw, warned their mom off the vaccine. Their mom caught covid and died. The vaccine would likely have saved her life.
Tens, no likely hundreds of thousands of people surely died due to misinformation and fear mongering.
Now measles might be making a comeback as well.
- It's feel so rare reading all those stories on internet, while my family is crazy alt-right that eat all the communist conspiracies on the internet, except the ones referencing vaccines or climate change. Like every newborn baby on the family is "quarantined" until all vaccines are on (at least the ones from the first 6 months) so everyone's following the vaccine calendar to mark when the baby's is going to meet the rest of the family.
My friend died before he was able to get a vaccine dose. He was young and fit and healthy, enough so that his death was covered in a local newspaper. He'd have probably have gotten his first vaccine dose if we'd caught COVID a couple weeks later, and that might have been enough to save him. I'll never know, and maybe he'd have still died, but I'll always resent people who have/had the choice to be vaccinated but choose not to.

Some people have too much free time and too few brain cells.

All that mask wearing in their youth killed those cells.
And too many QR codes
And not enough access to credible sources
- No, they've got plenty of access. They just don't want to be exposed to anything that challenges their indoctrination.
- Or rather too much access to too many non-credible sources.
  Meaning, we need to remove shit like Twitter from the net already.

I’m high risk as I’m immunosuppressed. I’ve had 8 vaccines, shielded for well over a year and always wore a mask. I finally caught COVID last week. There’s not a doubt in my mind that I would have died already if I hadn’t been vaccinated. My oxygen saturation levels just keep dropping - 90% today. I’m going to have to go to hospital ☹️

Best of luck, get well soon
Must be devastating, take care, friend.
I'm so sorry to hear it! I'm rooting for you and I know lots of other people are too!

Yeah, don’t accept trash from strangers.

I’d be more annoyed that this person couldn’t even bother me with a more up to date conspiracy.

Right? They're still triggered about masks?
- Masks trap CO2 and other gases, impeding the breathing process and killing you slowly
  …apparently at least 3 years slow, we’ll check back in with Cletus and his sisters(?) next spring.

This is far more than mildly infuriating, this is actively putting peoples lives at risk, it's enraging and quite scary, and why disabled and other vulnerable people are continuing to be more isolated than ever.

Fuck this person and the bullshit they spread. I rarely leave the house, but if I did and someone handed me something like this I'd grab the whole pile and set it on fire, casually roll over their feet with my wheelchair on my way, too (E: actually, scratch that, I wouldn't want to get that close to the disease vector, even with my mask on).

I’ve had it twice now and don’t mind getting close, otherwise agreed on all counts. Let’s hide the ~~accelerant~~ fairy juice under your chair, you can be getaway driver with clean hands. Tell me you have a rad van with wheel controls
- Alas, no van, but plenty of spots to hold lighter fluid and stolen flyers as I roll away lol

Report her to the store for solicitation. Owners hate that, even if they agree with the sentiment. Can't scare away the customers.

Yeah, Jehovah's Witnesses know to wait till someone is coming out rather than inside or heading in for this very reason.

very blatantly, right in front of her, wipe your hands with sanitizer and then wipe down the flyer …

EDIT: “Oh, this isn’t for the virus, y’all just nasty.”

"I got the vaccine and nothing bad happen to m-" start convulsing and making gross sounds while dropping to the ground
"Ahhh! The 5G! It buuuurns!"
- When that stupid PSA warning came through that conspiracy theorists said would "activate" the vaccine I was in my MAGAt infested office. I fell to the floor and screamed "The vaccine!" as soon as I heard everyone's phones go off.
- I wonder if you could convince one of these people of something even more crazy.

Are there doctors and scientists recommending people NOT to take it?

There are morons in every field. We can't just look at the outliers.

But they're the only ones who agree with meeeee!

Why is it in English but funded by some Spanish speaking organization

To make it seem like legitimate. "These other doctors in other countries are speaking out about it, while the establishment in this country is suppressing the "truth""
- Yeah, but just based on my own prejudices, the antivax community ain't a huge fan of the Spanish- speaking community.

Jesus Christ. That’s so much misinformation in just two sheets of paper.

It's the back and front of a single sheet of paper.
- Even more.. um.. impressive?

Not aborted monkeys!!

Take an obvious picture of her with your phone. Hand out flyers with her face saying avoid this woman .

Bacteria gets a bad rap.

They’re the only culture some people have.
- I'm going to go with my gut on this one and say you're spot on.
- I see what you did there 😉
And chemicals.
And GMOs
What did our gut flora do to deserve it?

Some Android Phones might need a QR SCANNER app to open these

🤦

Must be made by an old person lol

Jesus - I thought COVID wiped all these twits out already.

That was just COVID-19. Wait until COVID-21 (or whatever) and a larger chunk of groomed idiocy will disappear
- We really do need to just upgrade the version number, all these variants of 19 are sounding like bad sequels.

I like how page 1 says not to wear masks because they are bad put page 2 implies that you must wear a mask because getting the vaccine won’t allow you to not wear masks.

“Honey, remember we were talking about how catching Covid multiple times makes you stupid?”

We clearly need to bring back the big red rubber stamp. Just stamp it "SCAM" and leave it somewhere like a bulletin board. Because if they want to waste their money and paper, we should make it expensive for them. The stamp isn't expensive really and ink pads are fairly cheap and last a long time.

- Looks like a copy machine with all the artifacts, go to a library and it's probably $0.01 a page

There's some loon still plastering their ill informed, anti Vax / anti mask stickers on every bit of street furniture across the nearby town centre.

I would say some unfiltered shit at any moron that handed me something like this. It would probably be exactly what they want, but I would belittle them with every fiber of my being in the hopes that something sticks and they feel bad. It would make me feel a little better, but I am also a big man child sometimes.

Why can't they just go back to handing out Chick tracts? At least those were funny.

I'm still mad I never learnt any "real" spells, nor was never invited to join a coven, despite fulfilling a 1-20 D&D campaign. Dark Dungeons lied to me!!
- I do love that Jack had apparently spent about 10 minutes in the library's periodicals room reading articles about D&D and decided he knew enough about it to make that comic.
I was handed one of these when I was on a church trip as a teenager. One of many many reasons I became disillusioned, but pretty funny in retrospect.
- Oh they're great. I sometimes go look at their archives for a chuckle since all of their tracts are there for free. Most people's favorite is Dark Dungeons, which is about how D&D is satanic, but I have to say that my favorite would be Angels? which is about a Christian rock band who gets a manager named "Lew Siffer" and don't notice that there may be something weird there, but it's probably because they're very stupid, because their subsequent hit song goes something like "We're gonna rock rock with the rock!"
Why can’t they just go back to handing out Chick tracts? At least those were funny.
Speaking about the website/comics itself, I don't think 'bait and switch' would be a method that Jesus would want to be used to get people to convert to Christianity.
- It's sillier than that. Jack Chick seemed to genuinely believe that most people had just never heard of Jesus and once they do, they'll instantly convert.

Still don't understand why there's no consequence for actively harming others.

Crazy, the legend continues.

Don't hand it back; rip it up and then apologize and ask for a second one. Then rip that one up, too.
- This is the correct answer
- Tell em you want to help their cause by handing out flyers as well.
  Then just rip them up and throw them in the trash.
If I handed it back to her, it would have ended up in someone else's hands. Figured I could trash it on her behalf.

Pretty bad Q&A if everything is already answered

Misused the &, meant to be 'are'

Did you rightfully call her a brainless worm?

What a fucking knob

Honestly I'd love to go on that aircraft. Sounds like it'd be a pretty fun and exclusive experience.

Would you do it if the pilot contained aborted monkey cells?
- Fun fact: I looked it up and those cells used in the vaccines are from a fetus aborted in the 1960s lmao. They make it sound like they are just raping monkeys by the hundreds to make vaccines

Ask for more copy, turn it into toilet paper. Repeat.

Nah, dont infect your ass with stupid
- Plus, use something more water soluble for the sake of your plumbing.
For all the scarcity of TP that marked the beginning of the pandemic, why do they waste paper on this?

U got ne dat baby blud homes? I pay extra if it minority blood, that extra suffering and agony is FIYA

It would annoy me just as much to receive pro vaccine propaganda. Even the vaccine commercials annoy me.

I don't get it

At least those actually save lives.
- I just don't give a shit. I'm looking for the good mustard leave me alone.
- I don't care. You shouldn't force vaccines on people.
Shut up.
- No you!

I mean, that survey on the back isn’t lying, per se, but it’s taking things that are only minorly concerning and stating them in a way that is overblown or more alarming than they deserve.

“The best lies are based in truth”, I suppose.

What? Starting with the first one, thats already a lie. So is the third, they just don't understand what long-term means.
- A couple of them fall into the "technically true, but misleading territory" - I'm sure the person handing this out couldn't identify which though - broken clock right twice a day and all
  "Can you reverse effects" - no you can't make your immune system forget how to work. Probably not what they are going for here though.
  "Risk of [...] or other side effects?" - yeah the vaccines generally give people a headache and short lived fever symptoms
  "Have there been deaths?" - The astrazeneca vaccine had like a 0.000001% mortality risk (more likely to die driving to the pharmacy), and was pulled in many countries because that was deemed too dangerous. Person handing out the flyer has likely been parroting "mRNA vaccines cause blood clots" nonsense for years while being completely unaware that AZ was a traditional viral vector vaccine
  "Are there doctors recommending NOT taking it" - yeah, there are many notable anti-vaccine doctors, what they typically have in common is they earned their doctorate in computer science, social studies, or some other field that gives them no qualifications to talk about immunology
- I think you’re right :(

People who wear masks can never tell me why, if I wear underwear how come I can still smell my own farts?

In case you are serious or someone else is serious about this:
Masks, just like underwear, are permeable. If they wouldn't be, you would suffocate as no air would be able to reach your lungs. (At your rear, that's just a consequence of low requirements towards the material, which mainly serves as a covering and being able to dry.) So gas molecules are usually not stopped to pass through your underwear or masks.
The main difference between, e.g. FFP2/3, masks and your underwear is the size of particles that are able to pass through. Your underwear will be able to catch some moisture of a juicy fart and probably some shit particles. However, most of the gases and smaller particles can pass through. Filter masks are able to stop most particles down to a certain size. For FFP 2 masks at least 94% of particles down to a size of 0,6 micrometers can be stopped. Particles smaller than that are likely to pass through. FFP 3 masks block at least 99% of particles down to the same size.
The thing with viruses like Covid-19 is, that they are usually expelled from an infected person via the respiratory system, that means, your mouth and nose. There, the virus cells are mostly soluted within the moist air you breathe out. Moist air means: there are very tiny (mainly) water particles which are spread over a certain volume of gas. And they are floating with the currents of the gas. That's what basically constitutes an aerosol. Particles, tiny and lightweight enough to float with a gas (for a while).
You can see that clearly with spray cans. With breathing air it's not so good to see with the naked eye.
Those moist particles, loaded with virus cells, are usually large enough to be filtered out by FFP masks. It's not perfect of course, but it can help a great deal and contribute to prevention measures.
The stinky stuff in farts is afaik a pure gas and not an aerosol. (Did you know that in terms of gas volume, just about 2 % of a single fart contains the smelly chemicals?) Which is why neither masks, nor underwear help so much against stinky farts.
FFP masks are mandatory in jobs where dangerous smaller particles can enter your body. They help against dust, smoke and a lot of aerosols. But they don't filter out pure gases. That's what gas masks are for.
In terms of infection spreading, a neat side-effect of masks is that they can slow down the velocity of exhaled air, which helps to reduce how far the aersol spreads around a person. Trying to blow out a candle while wearing a mask isn't as easy as without a mask, which demonstrates this effect.
Futhermore, there has been a study suggesting that wearing a mask for a while or wearing it during rainy weather can - up to a certain point - further improve the filter capabilities of such face masks, since the moisture accumulates on the surface of the mask (in- and/or outside) and by this forms another protective barrier.
Thanks for coming to my TED talk.
- Wrong.
Are you LARPing as a Fox News viewer, or is that a genuine question?
- LARPing
Let me sneeze in your face and I'll let you sneeze in my face but you're wearing a mask.
See, it was not that hard to understand.
Dipshit
This has far too many downvotes for something that made me chuckle.