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the_dunk_tank @hexbear.net

Lovely_sombrero [he/him] @hexbear.net

1y ago

"Shots fired"

He rolled on the ground, unloaded a full clip into his own police car where there was a HANDCUFFED SUSPECT and yelled things like "shots fired" and "I'm hit"

144 comments

Comrade perpetrator
- I'm a tier one elite operator - tip of the spear, first in last out.
  :squirrel : chirp chirp chirppite chirp [drops acorn]
  
  "Uvalde" I sleep
  "Falling acorns" its go time!
- Arrest them all! All I say!!!
  But Sir, we don't have the trees.
  
  Arrest them all! All I say!!!
  Where are the ents?
- Uncritical support.
So the officer was charged with needlessly endangering the suspect's life, right?
Right?
- No but he was humiliated into resigning
  
  the greatest consequence an American police officer can face, being humiliated into resignation and forced to find work as a prison guard, mall cop or PE teacher
"are you hit?" "it felt like it"

I laughed out loud when the guys with rifles showed up to help him pick up the acorn
Fully eight seconds between him shouting SHOTS FIRED and actually returning fire. If he actually was being shot at he'd have died during one of his heavy encumbrance dodge rolls he pulled off. This man is unbelievably pathetic on so many levels.
- Dude ran I to a more open space and then played down for s while. If he was being shot at he would be mostly bullet.
Sir a second acorn has hit the cruiser
He actually thought he got hit. Yeesh.
- Probably pulled a muscle doing his commando roll.
  
  You laugh at him somersaulting along the ground but he needed those iFrames to avoid damage.
  
  Haha - that's probably exactly it.
you think you fell out of an acorn tree?
- bazinga
This video has convinced me that American police needs to be put down like rabid dogs.
- yea I think this now as well.
  I also thought this 8 years ago but I still do
- Considering what we're seeing in this video, it will be pretty easy when our time comes.
- We put down non-rabid dogs every single day who are far less dangerous
Truly remarkable display of cowardice.
Like dear God this is beyond scared of your own shadow. This is unloading a handgun at a car because of an acorn.
[Hiding behind a Tesla with disabled veteran plates] I'm good. I feel weird but I'm good.
- I just love how he instantly unloaded the full clip into his own car. Even if there really was a gunshot, just randomly shooting your own car doesn't seem like a good idea.
  
  I guess he thought the person in his car was shooting at him? idk, I'm not stupid enough to think like a cop.
- I'm good. I feel weird but I'm good.
  me the first time I took mushrooms
- Hahaha fuck i spill my drink
  
  Magazine dumps into cup
reno 911 ass police force
edit: link to the investigation
- When asked about prior military experience, Deputy Hernandez said he attended West Point, and was an infantry officer and an officer in special forces for the army for a total of ten years. Deputy Hernandez said he had two combat rotations to Afghanistan, but noted as an officer, he was not in direct combat.
  so he didn't personally do any in combat, but he did order his troops to level several schools with artillery strikes when he heard a soccer ball bounce off a wall.
  
  If he waited for a soccer ball he had remarkable restraint
- this is very funny reading
  
  the other cop (who had been on the force much longer!) also firing on the car is hilarious
  
  It's truly a masterpiece
  0:12.474 – Deputy Hernandez tries to stand up, but falls backwards.
  0:13.4 – As he is falling onto his back, he lets out a grunt
- Acorn comes into frame
  first timeline entry and I'm already laughing
- So it is. I thought I recognized the street. I've been down that road before when I have lived in the area. Talk about hitting close to home.
  
  Do you wear a ~~bulletproof vest~~ hardhat to protect yourself from crime when walking through the neighborhood?
- Lol that whole bit about a supressor in the report was either what got into this dumbasses' head and made him believe it was shots, or (more believable), it was what the two cops made up to justify having him believe an acorn was a gunshot.
- 0:03.597 – His patrol vehicle comes back into frame as he continues to roll. 0:03.8 – Deputy Hernandez yells, “Shots fired!” for a third time.
  
  Deputy Hernandez asked, “Acorn?” Investigator Hogan answered, “Acorn.”
- Lmao does it say he resigned as soon as this happened
  Gotta give it to him for realizing he's too fucking stupid to even be a cop!
  
  His mistake was missing the guy in the back of his cruiser 30 times. If he'd killed the prisoner they would have planted a gun and rallied around the cop
- 🤣The frame by frame description sounds like a DnD campaign.
  
  Heavy narrator voice: "Acorn comes into frame. "
  Sergeant Roberts yells, “Jesse, are you ok?”
- Final report Jacks on.pdf
  That's the real problem with society. Things would be different if instead of jacks on we had jacks off.
- I feel like this is too cringe for even Reno 911.
Has this asshole never been at a firing range? Gunshots are loud, how could he mistake an acorn for them except out of ignorance?
- Only thing I can imagine is his dumb pig brain is just wildly on edge, absolutely horrified of everything around him. His earballs are amplifying everything like comtacs while In a flight or fight adrenaline dump caused by a normal traffic stop.
  Just insane cowardice.
  
  Probably the fent tbh
  
  This is exactly it. Some Israeli psychopath probably trained him and gave him PTSD in the process of all the scare mongering.
- He didn't think it was a gunshot, he thought it was an incoming bullet plinking off the vehicle from a silenced gun or long range rifle lmao.
  
  Then why was he shooting at the squad car?
  I'm pretty sure he thought the handcuffed guy in the back of his car had somehow silently fired a gun at him.
  
  Even worse. A suppressed gunshot is still loud AF unless its a .22. or some other subsonic. He's dumb enough to think there's a fucking assassin out there targeting him.
He rolled on the ground, unloaded a full clip into his own police car where there was a HANDCUFFED SUSPECT and yelled things like “shots fired” and “I’m hit”
Like children playing pretend. Except you know, with deadly weapons and an immunity from consequences.
I’m beginning to suspect telling every cop they’re an expert in gun kata and must defend the flock from the wolves when they respond to a disorderly conduct call is not working
- expert in gun kata
  John Wick, but the intro has a moment where a bird lands on his roof and John screams and magdumps into his ceiling
  
  He goes to accost Reek at the gas station, trips and domes himself and his own dog
- Naah, couldn't be.
He was a veteran of the great squirrel wars
https://leoaffairs.com/bodycam-footage-released-of-officer-claiming-to-have-been-shot-before-firing-at-detained-suspect/
- Lmao
  To give additional flavor for anyone who hasn't watched: as he's dragging himself across the street like a baby giraffe, he's screaming GUHHHHH AHHH UNNNNGH
- Lmfao roasted
- that was my nickname in karate in highschool lmaoooo
  
  that is awesome lol
I couldn't even hear the acorn.
- It's quieter than his footsteps lmao. You can actually see it hit the car roof right above the support between the rear passenger window and trunk side window
holy guacamole this is funnier than that pig in the slide whew lad
@squirrel@hexbear.net
Was this you? 🐿️
- 🐷 🌰🌰🌰💥🔫🐿️🚩
  
  thank you for your bravery, comrade squirrel
Is the person in the car ok?
Your link is mislinked.
https://twitter.com/githii/status/1757500612143407501
That's some fucked up shit. Shame he didn't shoot the Tesla when he was next to it.
- Shit would have exploded like GTA3 lmao
Looks like a p320, the gun that dozens of cops claim just goes off by itself
- It's actually known to go off by itself, but cops are lying about it
  
  Great example of "feature, not a bug".
"dude am I hit?"
People should buy fentanyl and sprinkle it around like they used to use salt to keep demons away
- my sponsor says i'm not allowed to buy fent anymore
  
  That's a pretty reasonable excuse
- Those ant traps you can get at the store but its just little boxes of fent...
This is the Citizen Kane of body camera footage.
isn't this the plot to chicken little
Our goons really are trained by the
.
That bastard should be in a clinical mental institution, not a cop.
lol, if someone told me this was a guerilla promotional campaign for Hot Fuzz I would absolutely believe it
- I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:
  yewtu.be
  inv.nadeko.net
  yt.artemislena.eu
  piped.video
Oh sure but when I climb aboard a roller coaster with a belt fed machine-gun, tie on a blindfold, and hold down the trigger the entire duration of the ride they kick me off the force.
- forgot to say "shots fired"
  rookie mistake
- That roller coaster would be awesome if it was set up far away from everyone else.
  
  Rail shooter
When you think yourself an action hero, even mudane everyday noises sound like a threat
A troop of adolescent chimpanzees would be a better peace keeping force.
Literal baby brain shit.
DEEZ NUTS

GOTTI
Keystone cops
How much does the US rely on tourism? This is the kinda shit that makes me not want to visit.
holy shit that video is so good
:wiggum-officer-down:
This is straight out of the simpsons
CW please!
- I didn't watch all of it so maybe I missed something, but for what? a car gets hit by gunfire but there were no injuries except maybe the cop's ankle from rolling. he does scream a lot
  
  Maybe the gunfire?
I was driving a humvee in Iraq many many years ago. Unarmored, no doors, only had the front wind shield with the troop benches in the back.
The platoon sergeant was next to me in the passenger seat and we were out on some back roads. At one point we caught up to an Iraqi pickup truck and were following behind it for a while.
It backfired and the sergeant freaked out a bit.
Its never a good thing when a barely 21 year old is trying to calm down a dude who's almost 40.

144 comments