What is the right way to have your toilet paper?

According to the patent (US465588A) it should be over.

If it’s under spiders can make a nest between the toilet paper and the wall so you’re wiping your ass or coochie with that.
- Well great. New fear unlocked.
- If their web can catch a fly, it can catch my shit. Extra strength TP!
This is the way.
Are we really beholden to the past like that? Things change, and hopefully improve. I know most people say over but my argument for under is that it can do everything over can... But, due to the extra friction, I can also tear it one-handed by ripping fast and the roll won't continue spinning.

What did they do before 1891?
- Three seashells?
- In the days of old when knights were bold and toilet paper wasn't invented, they'd wipe their ass with a piece of grass and walk away contented.
- Discarded corn cobs and pages from the Sears Roebuck catalog. At least in midwestern USA.
- Your hands or water or a sponge that is then cleaned in water. It's actually really interesting, and I encourage you and everyone else to read up on it.
- Let's just say that swans didn't enjoy the human use for their necks.
- They had it roll the other way
- Wipe their ass with newspaper?

Over unless you got a cat or little kids

Or unless you have a weird roll holder that is super prone to overfeeding.

Under, but fold the beginning of the paper over itself, so it appears to be over until your unsuspecting victim tries to grab some paper. Then they realize the true nature of your depravity.

how can I delete someone else's comment?
- Better yet, how do we get this person screened for psychopathy?
- Where can I claim the money that is equal to the number of upvotes of my comments?
If you put in a little extra unroll/reroll work, you can make it mysteriously change direction mid-roll and you'll be long gone.
You’re a sick son of a bitch

Over has always been more effective, also to take it with one hand

It can be highly dependent on if you own a cat.

When I am not a cat owner: Over

When I am a cat owner: Under, most definitely.

Case in point:

My cat does this, while also ripping it up, so doesn't matter if it's over or under
I understand a lot of cat owners have this happen, but my cats have never done it other than once and then never again after I redirected them with a cat toy.

Over, to prevent the spread of bacteria by touching the wall. Under is acceptable if you have a cat, who will fuck with the roll.

The toilet paper drags against the wall either way though?
- Yes, but the paper is clean, your hands are dirty. If the paper hangs over, you can grab the paper directly. If the paper hangs under you may have to touch the wall to be able to get at the paper.
- hands touching the wall

mashed into a thick paste and applied liberally to the anus

Ah, I think I'm going to need a few visual aids for that plan...

My cats never cared about toilet paper, so over all the way.

Beard, not mullet.

Came here to say this exact thing! lol

Over. The end is most likely to be visible at all times.

Over, unless you have cats

A few years ago I chose to stop thinking about it. I just refill the roll and don’t worry about it. When I realized it didn’t matter, it was a weight lifted off my shoulders. Same with trying to stop the gas pump on the nearest dollar or setting the tv volume to an even number.

I don’t know why I felt such a relief when I let go, but I did and now I’m free!

You animal.

Do you have kids or pets that like to play with the toilet paper roll?

If yes, then Under.

If no, then Over.

Usenet had like a 10 month discussion about this after which it was considered definitively proven and agreed upon that this is the answer. Everyone ITT can rehash the discussion if they want but they are only rejecting science.
- Thank you.
  
  Rejecting science, no good.
  
  You have the science, good!

Centerfeed

Exactly! Just grip the cardboard tube and pull the middle out

My toilet paper is sideways.

... Left or right?
- Front side faces the person currently shitting.
Same, on a vertical spike.
- As a warning to other toilet paper rolls.
3D printer went brrrr, so I got myself a bona fide sideways toilet roll holder
- It's because of the way the toilet is facing. I would actually rather not have toilet paper, I didn't grow up with it and the only reason I have it now is because the place is made to have guests.
I have a ledge above my toilet or a commode next to the toilet. Who needs this weird holder in the first place?

Over, unless you have a holder that covers the wall.

Be chaotic like me and just put it on whichever way it's facing when you put the new roll on.

Some people just want to watch the world burn

Over is best for high rate on a household single roll holder, but if you ever load a bathroom stall toilet roll magazine its gotta be under or the next round wont cycle into chamber

Whatever way you choose.

I grew up with cats, so my default is under.

I don't even have a holder

My husband just leaves it on the floor below the dispenser, even in the bathroom that just has a flip up instead of a springy cylinder.

Sounds like my wife.
Is your husband my girlfriend?
- Perhaps. Does your girlfriend have a shoe/boot addiction?

Under, 'cause cat.

Look at the patent

Vertical over the toilet lid.

Under because that way you can model it by making a cylinder and adding a plane to it, because the plane is attached to the back you don't have to do the extra work of making sure the textures line up.