It's going. I'm alive.

My foreman would always say "Love my job" in a happy tone after anything bad happened on a job site. The happier the tone, the worse it was

then comes the singing.
- "Dear God, he's doing H.M.S. Pintafore. We have to leave. Now!"
I know that guy

I feel like the one going on about defcon does not know defcon 5 is actually pretty chill

Should've gone the Kanye route and said defcon 3
- *death con 3

Fun fact: in America asking "how's it going?" is just a greeting, nobody really cares

Brits ofen say "You alright?" As a substitute for "Hi."
Pretty jarring when you're not used to it. Id think "God, I must look like shit if they're genuinely checking on my welfare!"
- Yeah Tom Scott did one of his linguistics videos about that, he had a word for it but some questions aren't really questions they're basically just rituals, though rephrased a different way makes them genuine questions, and when you have major dialects of the "same" language like British and American English, we use different ones. "Are you alright?" is basically a noise of greeting in Britain and an expression of genuine concern in America, while "How are you?" is the reverse.
- When I moved to London, I remember the old lady at the laundromat addressing me as "love"
  I was like: "Damn, over here my charm even works with old ladies"
  As it turns out, calling somebody "love" it's just a way of addressing people in some English regions.
Won't stop us from having a conversation or even just bitching about something that is randomly bothering us.
I always respond thoughtfully to people I don’t like. Then I ask how they are and watch them squirm.
- be advised: this will not work with the majority of neurodivergent people
depends on the part of America. in some rural areas no but in the city absolutely
Germans: na?
It's really like that everywhere, in my experience.
It's at most small talk, not a license to dive into one's life story.

My favorite to use: "not gonna lie to you."

My coworker once when I asked him a hard question: "Don't make me lie to you."
I still think of that a lot and try to work it in when someone asks me an impossible question.
- when someone asks me an impossible question.
  I think that response actually works for the loaded question:
  “Have you stopped beating your wife?“
Implying that you... sometimes do!? :-P
- When it comes to how I'm feeling? Sure, often even
- Implying that if you said "i'm (fine/ok/alright/good/etc)" would be a lie.
I usually just go with "sheeeeeeeeeeiiiiiit"

"I'm doin." -I am not doing well and I don't want to talk about it. But I'm also too exhausted and shattered to keep lying about my mental state for the sake of social niceties, so I'm hoping my vague, neutral statement will either convey what I'm feeling, or you'll fill in the blank with whatever you want to hear. Just as long as you stop asking how I'm doing.

Oof

"Too blessed to be depressed" - they're a Christian fundamentalist who is depressed but trying to convince themselves otherwise. You should run.

I'm here ain't I = Defcon 5

So normal then?

Yeah, def on 5 is basically civilian peace times, right?

Living the dream!

Nightmares are dreams, right?

"Living the dream!"
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah, I hope to wake up any day now."
Gonna ~~steal~~ pirate that
- R
It's been like three years of hearing that and they're still working the same job lol...
I prefer "living a dream".
Am I living someone else's dream? Is it a nightmare? Am I disassociating? -- the answer is "yes".

Defcon 5

I never know if they're meaning that it's not that bad, or if they actually mean defcon 1.

Because with defcon, the lower the number, the worse the situation.

Defcon NaN
- "The situation is so bad, it can't even be defined!"

"Hanging in there"

Seems very American. If you ask a German you be prepared to not get Smalltalk.

This isnt small talk, this is a survival mechanism to figure if the person will enact violence on you or not. Optimally you want the response to be empty words, grunting, or being told to fuck off.
- Optimally you want the response to be empty words, grunting, or being told to fuck off.
  US/DE/both, did you mean?
A friend of mine, married to a European, said that I should have been born in Europe, not the US, due to my hatred of small talk.
- It really depends on the country and people's personality.
  In my experience in Southern Europe people tend to love share stuff about themselves (and will easilly go into their life story) whilst in Northern Europe getting anything about them without having a long acquaintance with them is very hard if not impossible.
  Apparently the Finnish are very averse to small talk (pretty much the opposite of Southern Europe).
  Then there are also other variances - in Britain they'll tend to portray themselves as better than they really are feeling, in Portugal they'll tend to complain about life and things and in The Netherlands, if you do get them to open up, they'll be very matter of fact.
  After language, it's maybe the hardest kind of thing to get used to when going to live in another country.
- Finland is very good for people who hate smalltalk.
Sounds amazing. I should move to Germany for a while.

Wh... what's y'alls base suicidality level

Our national holiday consists of drinking and playing with explosives at nighttime. You do the math.
It's generally a very cheerful level of suicidality though! Would be awful to bring the mood down by making a suicide all somber or some shit.
- Yah we kill ourselves, Or overly think about it, with extreme excitement and joy over here.
- Also one of our best known sub-cultures is one in which the concept of health and safety are slurs when used outside of work. I should know I am a relatively cautious Redneck, that just means I actually keep the medkit nearby for if shit goes worng.
it's not bad
Fair to middlin'
"I'm okay"? "I'm not too bad" would mean that you're near the base suicidality level
Wouldn't jump into a running vehicle. But wouldn't try to try to climb up a cliff

Where does "Good enough" fit on the scale? Asking for a friend...

"Good enough" is "My head is barely above water and I'm wondering if it's worth the effort"
Good enough= My day is shit, My week is shit, My life has been shit, but it's not as shit as other people so I don't have the right.
- It's the suffix that hits hardest:
  ... it's not as shit as other people so I don't have the right.
  _{at least that's what my friend that I'm asking for definitely said}

Don't forget "too blessed to be depressed"= I think God will be angry with me if I admit life (read: murica) isn't perfect

DefCon Stages:
5 - "I'm here, ain't I?"
4 - "ain't dead yet."
3 - "it is what it is"
2 - "I'm not gonna lie to you"
1 - "...don't worry about it"

Her horrors persist, and so do I.

In the opposite direction, when I moved to England it took me a while to get used to compliment "inflation" over there.

For example when somebody's opinion on something is:

"interesting", it means it's shit
"ok", means it's bad or mediocre
"good" and "great", means it's average
"wonderful" and "amazing", means it's good

I once asked one of the natives how did they transmit the message that they trully believes something was a 10/10 and was explained that's done by going into details on how something is so great.

Meanwhile Germany:
"interesting" means it's shit
"it goes" means it's bad or mediocre
"ok" means it's average
"can't complain" means it's fairly good
"very good" means it's great
"really not bad" means surprisingly great
- in Ordnung

‘Nother day, ‘nother dollar…

I prefer:
Nother day, nother dime, nother shit on company time.
- Boss makes a dollar,
  I make a dime,
  That was a poem,
  For a simpler time.
  Now the boss makes a hundred,
  And the workers a cent,
  While he has employees,
  Who can't pay their rent.
  Why wait till the boss makes a million,
  And the workers make jack?
  It's high time we riot,
  And take our world back.

I'm German and for me, "can't complain" means I have nothing to complain, I'm fine, nothing special

I find Germans have an easier time replying to things very frankly and without garnishment or humor. I can ask a German, "How are you?", and he may reply with "I'm fine" and it can be taken at face value.
Americans tend to be more, I don't know, conflict avoidant in their replies? There's more expectation of subtext, of irony, and it's not as typical to take "I'm fine" at face value.
"Can't complain" is another good one. It's often heard as, "I can't complain [because nobody would listen anyway]". Tone is important, as is environmental context. Blue collar workers at the site say this, yeah their day is going to shit. Your buddy says it over drinks, maybe he's having a neutral, normal time of life, or maybe his life is going to shit and he's giving the ironic answer to avoid diving into his real issues, while still communicating that things are not perfect.
Last week I was asked how my day was. It had been a perfectly normal, decent day, good time at work, beautiful weather, and my reply was "Life's a peach". I got back, "That bad, huh?" Yeah, the American habit of taking genuine expression and searching for a darkness under it can be tiring sometimes.

What annoys me with this culture is when they expect foreigners to use the same exhuberant language and they think something is wrong with you if you don't.

British -
"Alright?"
"Alright?"
French -
"Çava?"
"Çava. Çava?"
Way simpler

My high-school friend group adopted "it goes" from our French class ("Comment ça va?" "Ça va!", roughly meaning "How goes it?" "It goes!" being the common neutral greeting taught in French classes) and I slightly resent it being described negatively here.

Even better is, we casually drop the "Comment" and add the accent of a question instead, so it can go like : "Ça va?" "Ça va."
Note that in French we can make the meaning of it vary from roughly 'not great' to 'good' just by how enthusiastic we are. It's really only when we want to express radical emotions that we might stop using it.
(Although someone depressed might not want to express their distress and use it like the expressions in this meme..)

"On the right side of the dirt."

The dirt is always browner over there

!2meirl4meirl@lemmy.world

I often respond with: “Well, I’m still kicking and screaming.” I don’t know why. I think it got used a lot when I was growing up - someone getting dragged kicking and screaming.
Folks get tripped up by that.

For me, it means that despite the fight being hopeless, I’m still trying.

It’s been a rough week at work, and being in an environment where we are all on call and numerous people are subbing for others who are having life get in the way, a lot of people are working late and taking weekend shifts that they would have otherwise had off.

One of my college friends works with me, and I know his responses to these questions pretty well, and boy howdy have I seen him go through all of these responses in order as things got worse and worse while the director pops in and out of call to check on us and get updates on the situation.

Considering we would have had the weekend off and both of us stayed very late, things are going pretty OK, all things considered. Can’t complain too much if I’m still truckin’

One time I was in a really run-down thrift store looking for anything neat that stood out. A random guy asked how I was doing and y'know, I tried to be genuine enough, but in return he gave what is now one of my favorite replies:

"Too blessed t'be stressed!"

The delivery of it was like he actually meant it. Like he was just enjoying his day lookin' at stuff and nothing could bother him.

It's a good outlook, y'know... especially because at the time I was in a miserable job and often used the "Been better" and "I'm here." Responses because I just didn't have much else in me.

I love stories like this because it makes me reflect on random people I've seen who have stuck in my memory for years who probably never noticed me. Makes me wonder if anyone remembers me for something random like this
- Makes me wonder if anyone remembers me for something random like this.
  In a wild turn of events, I was going through my replies and remembered you from a future comment, for kindly encouraging me when I described my ADHD struggle with keeping my comments brief online!
  So, I guarantee I'm not the only one who remembers you for a good word. :)

if you're a nerd and want to remain mysterious about your status like the OP, just say " red 5 standing by."

It's more of a "I just lost my starboard engine. Get set up for your attack run."

swandiving into a woodchipper. Love it

whenever I hear living the dream I hear it like:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LwUvEsWwWt0

Yup.

You want to make them stop and process, answer it with "I can still walk, how about you?"

I see no "it is what it is" on here. This one happens a lot where I am

I don't lie, so I'll say, "well, you know..." and if they are friends, they know, if they aren't, that's a clue that they don't want to.

I can't fake, for God's sake, why am I driving in the wrong lane?

I climb hand over hand closing my eyes
Too scared to look down I climb hand over hand
Putting distance between I and I and the ground
I get to the top I stand on the edge
I look to the sky and say all my prayers
What could be better than a swan dive into the asphalt?
I don't know
Nothing can be better than a swan dive into the asphalt