Americans using anything but the metric system

Bicycle is fine because it's an everyday object I can visualise, but what the hell am I supposed to do with 800 burgers?

WTF my bike is about a metre twenty high
Have they got fuckin dwarf deer there or something
- I don't understand what you're saying. How many piled hamburgers in a metre?
- Apparently, they do. For example, the white-tailed deer has a shoulder height of 1.0m to 1.1m, and that's in the North. Towards the South, they get smaller.
  I guess, that would be a general thing. Mainland US is relatively temperate. The real giant kinds of deer, like e.g. moose/elks, only really live in colder regions, which are further north (including in Alaska).
- Mule or black tail maybe?
Eat em!
- Ok, gimmie
- Unfortunately, I have an eating disorder that limits my diet severely. Burgers don't make the list, I'm afraid.
Americans are way more familiar with hamburgers that bycicles
- Can confirm.
I worked at McDonald's for quite a while as a teen. A regular hamburger patty there is 1/10 lb and a quarter pounder is...as you might suspect 1/4 lb. That would make an adult deer weight between 80 - 200 lbs.
The average weight of an adult male whitetail deer is 203 lb (maximum, 405 lb). The average weight of a female is about 155 lb (maximum, 218 lb).
I don't recall receiving any training on the weight of the condiments or buns, but I'd suspect they weight slightly more than the small patty amd slightly less than the larger one, so let's assume 1/5 lb. That changes our original 80 - 200 lb range to be 240 - 360 which is a little too heavy.
In conclusion, hamburgers are a shit measurement, but if you had a mix of 800 child-size and adult-sized burgers and you hit it with your truck, it would do a similar amount of damage as hitting a deer.
- ... child-size and adult-sized burgers and you hit it with your truck ...
  I'm sorry, but where does McDonald's get their meat from again? 🤔
Invite guests round for dinner at the White House.
- No, that's hamberders.
It's about 3/4 the weight of the average American.
Give em to yo mama for a light afternoon snack?
- Haha that was a good one
Hum... What part of the bike exactly? And there are bikes with widely different sizes out there.
Overall, it lets me have an idea of the size. Unfortunately, not as good an idea as that reference-free photo.
Bicycles come in a variety of sizes and configurations tho...
Also what kind of deer?
Divide by 4.
- what's 1/4 of a Royale with cheese?
Yeah, it's particularly weird, because surely people from the US have a good sense how much a pound weighs, and a pound weighs more than a burger, so you need to imagine a less big number of them.
- And people are much closer in size - isn’t “the weight of your uncle Eddie” more meaningful?
Bicycles come in so many sizes and shapes that it's as useful measure as a stone
- So do deer, this is intended as a mental shortcut to roughly approximate size instead of a precise measurement.
- Isn't a stone an english measurement?

why doesn’t someone just push it out of the way?
Or.. punch it?
- Chris Redfield is busy somewhere else
- It's the police, they'll just shoot it out of the way.
- Looks like something you can manipulate with a sheikah slate
- Why push it, just ride it like the pioneers used to do.

According to google, a deer has a height between 0.85 to 1.5 metres. According to the Texas Almanac, the Lone Star State extends 801 straight-line miles (from north to south). This equates to 1289084,54 metres.

Taking this into account, a deer is between 0,00000066 and 0,0000012 Texas.

I hope this helps.

But how many square burgers is that?
- Sir, this isn't Wendy's.
- Great question!! Ok a rough estimate is the best I can do. As everything is bigger in Texas, I will take a relatively big deer for reference. As you will understand, I must compare area with area, so here goes:
  Taking a BigMac as a reference and assuming a patty diameter of 10.4cm Source. This would lead to an area of 84.95cm2.
  A bigger deer skin could be 150x139 cm Source. On the one hand this is an overestimation because those are the maximum measures and it’s not perfectly square, but on the other hand we’re not taking certain area’s such as the hooves and head into account. The area comes to 20850cm2.
  So one deer is, in terms of area, as big as 245,4 hamburgers.
  Again, I hope this helps.
- Somewhere between 746 and nineteen quintillion. Hope that helps.

Are we talking 1/4lb, 1/3lb, or 1/2lb? Then are we talking single, double, triple? Hamburgers as a unit of measurement is a horrible idea.

A hamburger weighs as much as 3 bananas, everyone knows that silly.
- https://metaefficient.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/05/giant-banana-in-hand.jpeg
Say what you will about the American education system, but I know it’s a 1/4 lb burgers because you could get close(ish) to 200 lbs of meat from a deer if you were lucky in Oregon Trail.
I need a conversion to cheeseburgers. I rarely work with regular hamburgers.

What's the convention rate from hamburger to American frie's?

3 bags of five guys fries per burger.

Hamburger units feel appropriate for things that can be hamburgers.

But that includes organs and stuff so they also need to tell us how many hotdogs. I weigh 783 hamburgers and 132 hotdogs
- You forgot to add in the 15% sawdust..
Maybe, but there's a lot of most animals that I don't want in a burger or any kind of ground meat. Bones, cartilage, organs, etc.

That's how you know that Americans hate even their own imperial system. As an American myself, I gotta ask, is it the weight of a Cheeseburger or the Big Mac?

Roughly 1/800th of a deer.
A Big Mac is ~250g, a cheeseburger ~120g.
An American male mule deer is 95 - 150kg.
So to answer your question, they're using something closer in size to the cheeseburger and not the Big Mac, as 800 Big Macs is about ~190kg whereas 800 cheezburgers is about 96kg.

So you're telling me that deer are made out of hamburgers and bicycles?

According to my calculations, deer are bicycles made of hamburgers
- This math checks out.
- Perfect.
The person who wrote this is on a bicycle to work off the 800 burgers made from deer.
That's excellent deduction, Watson.

Fun facts:

1 Mile Per Hour ≈ 2.511 Bananas Per Second

1 Kilometer Per Hour ≈ 1.561 Bananas Per Second

Calculated with the assistance of http://bananaforscale.info/

Keeping it at seconds still makes it relatively comfortable for me. Bananas per minute (BPM) is where it's at
- 1 Mile Per Hour ≈ 150.688 Bananas Per Minute
  1 Kilometer Per Hour ≈ 93.633 Bananas Per Minute

1 centiyard is about equal to 1 centimeter

1 miliyard is 3 milifeet

1 kiloyard is 3 kilofeet

It would be the same as the metic system having something like a "hand"

That if you wanted to express 1/3 of a meter you could just call it 1 hand. 2/3 meter would be 2 hands.

If you were using this metric system and knew that something had to be two hands long. You'd simply call it 2 hands instead of .66 meters or 66 centimeters.

If something had to be 2.5 hands long it would be .825 meters or 82.5 centimeters

Meter and yard are both random established lengths. Using miliyards or millimeters is exactly the same.

US customary units just have smaller unit names you can call them if it is convenient. If you never wanted to use anything but yards like the metric system does meters, it's possible. Don't want to use miles? Then megayards.

I do think 1 simple system that everyone uses is needed and the metric system is simple.

But if stupid Americans can use the "difficult" system, it can't be too hard.

But if stupid Americans can use the "difficult" system, it can't be too hard.
I think about this whenever I see someone complain about how Fahrenheit is arbitrary and how are you supposed to remember that water freezes at 32° and boils at 212°. I guess American brains are just able to retain more.
- You never deal with 0°C/32°F or 100°C/212°F unless you're in a science lab.
  They are nice numbers in celcius, but for real-world applications, it's almost meaningless.
  When I boil water on the stove, I don't check if it hits 100°C. When I freeze water in the freezer, I don't check if it hits 0°C.
  Everyone can get by without knowing the exact degrees.
  This is pure water at standard pressure. Higher or lower altitudes will change it, and if your water has minerals or impurities in it, it will also change it. It's pretty arbitrary.
  Water on roads can freeze before it hits 0°C outside. It can even snow above 0°C.
  Fahrenheit is a very simple scale other than those two things. <0° extremely cold, >100° extremely hot for air temperature. Freezers are 0°F and Saunas are 200°F. Hot tubs are 100°F. You bake cookies at 325° to 375°, pizza is cooked at 600° to 800°F. You'll find a lot of 25° increments in cooking.
  Fahrenheit isn't really a part of the US customary units.
  Knowing both Fahrenheit and Celsius, I do think Fahrenheit is simpler for real-world applications. For science they are just numbers on a scale. Converting is the only real problem.
I just feel the need to say the yard and meter weren't randomly established distances. They were chosen. Meter being the earth's circumference divided by 40 million (or rather the distance from the pole to the equator divided by 10 million). Useful for map making and navigating.
And the yard being the distance from the nose to the thumb of some British monarch, Henry I, I think. Useful for buildings and making sure things are within reach for the average person

I want this on a T-shirt.

I'm willing to defend the use of US Customary.

Come at me, bitches.

Stand at my back! We will fight them off together!
- Tradesman? Skilled labor? Common day vikings!
- But stand at least 3 burritos away plz.

I once saw a tsunami tidal wave height described in refrigerators tall. Something like it could reach the height of 2.5 refrigerators.

How do Americans find out how big a bicycle is?

Oh, you know. We see them at schools, on the news...
- Some of us steal them.
Average ballsack height.
- Well going by that measurement, the ladies are gonna have an ahem, interesting ride...

Mmmmm, venison burgers! I’m considering a new grill and that would put me over….. I wonder how many venison burgers my chest freezer holds
- We have an 18cu ft upright freezer, it currently contains probably about 60lbs ground venison, plus roasts and cuts from two deer, but also something like 1/8hog, 1/4cow, bunch of fish and say 1/2dozen prepped dinners. You could fit like 5or6 processed deer I bet in the average chest freezer which would be a great many burgers, say 3 or 400.
  I found on a quick search that 0.5lb ground beef is 14.44cu in. So if we're calling all red meat the same density, and a loose packing factor of 0.75 it looks like about 1615 1/2lb venison burgers in my freezer which is quite a bit more than 400.
  18cuft 1728=31104cuin, 31104/14.44=2154burgers, 21540.75=1615 burgers (1/2lb)

So what you're saying is, I can make 800 venison hamburgers from a single deer? Nice.

If you like eating every single piece, guts, brains, bones and all, sure go for it 👍
- Hey if you grind the bone fine enough you can't tell and it is a great source of calcium.

Of course then when you ask how tall a bicycle is they'll tell you it's about as tall as a deer. Damn useless

About... yea high. Like, two dozen hamburgers.
- With or without cheese?

You might have noticed. It's kind of our thing, doing things differently from the rest of the world for no good reason.

Different measuring system

Different cars

Different health care system

Different social ethics

Different system of government

Very few trains

We're just a bunch of silly dumbasses here.

I mean there is a good reason.... And that reason is, which I will state in this comment, is that the reason is very good in terms of the fact that hereby unto forthwith hence that reason is valid.
You're not, you're aware of that.
But some people are super America-centric and can't imagine switching to anything unamerican.
- Most of our people are that way. Our arrogance in this stupid notion of American Exceptionalism holds us back, and too many of us are too stupid to realize it.

To be fair: if anyone's going to intuitively know the weight of 800 hamburgers, Americans are it. :)

Also, I'm not entirely opposed to using "every day" analogies for stuff like this.

Yeah they even named their official weight measurement after the quarterpounder hamburger
I use metric, so you tell me weight in kg and I imagine it in half the number of (2 liter) water bottles. Which I have a pretty good intuition for since I often carry anywhere between 1 and 12 at a time.
Of course if I had to suffer imperial, I would like analogies as well.
- Same with me on the water. I grew up Australia.
  Since moving to the UK, I'm still trying to get used to medieval bollocks. Gimme analogies, because Stones used to be 1 Stone of wheat was a different weight to 1 Stone of, say, actual stones. Mental.

800 hamburgers just sounds like a challenge.

There's a great SNL skit about this.

Washington's Dream - SNL

As an American, I appreciate when measurements are already laid out the way I’ll understand. A “meter” isn’t a thing. A hamburger is a thing. Thank you.

A meter is defined as a thing but the distance traveled by light in 1/299792458 of a second may not be the most evocative reference for the common person.
- Did you know that a pendulum exactly one meter long will swing exactly once per second? Yep, science!
Hamburger is not a standard measure. Do you mean it's a small cheeseburger or a large deluxe super burger? What place do you take it from? Those can get to like three times difference in sizes.
It's impossible to say how big is a "hamburger". But you can precisely define a meter, and it gets intuitive very quickly with a fraction of effort you imagine it to be.

To be fair, when people give me measurements in Metric, I just get confused as I have no frame of reference

What's your frame of reference when using imperial?
- The inch is 3 grains of barley of course! At least the kind of barley they had In the 14th century. Alternatively the length of 12 poppy seeds in a line. You probably have lots of those lying around your house right?
  The foot is about the size of a clown shoe, duh!
  And the mile is about the length of 1000 paces from a malnourished roman soldier
- And inch is the length of a finger between knuckles, a foot is the obvious and a yard is the length of my stride
1 meter ≈ one large step
1 centimeter ≈ width of an index finger
- that helps with the centimeter, not so much the meter
Same is true for feet, miles and whatever.
It's a matter of habit. You intuitively know how much foot is, how much mile is, and it's only a matter of time and habit that you start intuitively getting meters and centimeters the same way.
But for as long as you make this transition, remember that:
1 inch is about 2,5 cm,
1 foot is about 1/3 of a meter
1 mile is about 1,5 kilometers.
Yes, those are not super accurate, but those are simple numbers and they give you a quick idea.