Modern beauty standards

Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masturbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masturbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW

Stop dropping your phone on the fucking train

Every morning I clock into work, and 12 hours later I clock out covered in jizz because someone dropped their phone while looking at porn and turned the whole trip into a goddamn gangbang. I can’t take it anymore. I’m literally knee deep in spunk by the end of the day, because all you motherfuckers are apparently lubing up your hands and can’t get a grip. We’ve all had to start wearing blindfolds when we exit the front so we don’t accidentally get a peak and start furiously cranking our cocks to “thugposts” or “femboys” or whatever the newest horny fad is. For the love of god, stop dropping your phone on the fucking train.
- Sounds like we need to get the SCP Foundation involved. I'm getting some serious Turn Down for What vibes from this.
Permanently Deleted
- Glad to be of service!

She's a man eater.

Watch out boy she'll chew you up.
- Ohhh-ohhh here she comes

Zorak approved

/blink

Also a good Mother (photo taken yesterday):

Some Mantis dude died for this pic
- Plus the babies eat each other. It's dying all the way down.
- Turns out that whole thing was wolf science; the researchers were literally starving them so of course they would resort to cannibalism.
How it walk round wit dat wagon
Junk on the trunk

This was actually the inspiration for some art I got, the initial idea being that the person wished for an ideal girlfriend and ended up with an insect lady who was objectively beautiful but extremely awkward to look at. It came as a result of me looking into what people considered attractive and noticing that every single trait that could be applied to a bug (because they sure as hell aren't getting "intelligent") did.

Now i'm bug-pilled. The future is going to be made up of insect-people.

In case you were curious what it looked like, here is the concept art I drew

And the completed version can be found at: https://twitter.com/ElietteQlay/status/1680868917038776320?s=20

EDIT: Found this one as well
There's a Craig Ferguson interview, where he says one of the secrets of some(!!!) of the most attractive Hollywood actors, is that in real-life they look like bug people. You know, weird looking, big eyes, huge head, tiny body. Looks great on camera and in 2d, not so much in the flesh. Probably also why IRC some Hollywood insiders call actors lollipop people. Stick with a big head on it.
The fallacy you're under is that these things are 'big' or 'small', which implies they're not actually ideal. That leads to hyperbole like this where the proportions are too extreme.
- Tell me about it. There's a meme among artists where they ask for proportions to be bigger and bigger until the thing in question takes up the entire page. You're like "Are you sure this is what you want" and they're like "Hmm you think you can make it juust a little bigger?"
  
  It's https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V5eaDhCVNJU if anyone ever asks for something to be made more naturally proportioned.

So hot.

“She had six strong legs and it frightened me. She had insect eyes but I could still see that the look she gave him you give to me.”

well, now I know this exists.

thanks, I guess

edit: apparently this guy is responsible for R.E.M.

Wikipedia:
To mate
following courtship,
the male usually leaps onto the female's back,
clasping her thorax and wing bases
with his forelegs.
He then arches his abdomen
to deposit and store sperm
in a special chamber near the tip of the female's abdomen.
The female lays between 10 and 400 eggs,
depending on the species. Eggs are typically deposited in a froth mass-produced by glands
in the abdomen.
This froth hardens,
creating a protective capsule,
which together with the egg mass
is called an ootheca.

poemforyoursprog is that you?
- I just liked the wikipedia entry and thought it had a touch more poetry and... enthusiasm let us say than I was expecting. And no, poemforyoursprog would have made it all rhyme.