Dating

Now try finding someone you find attractive and who also finds you attractive in return (it's impossible).

I did a calculation once about my chances of finding a compatible long-term partner, inspired by the Drake Equation and using many many assumptions. The numbers are not good: ~22 out of 8 billion.
- As a married man, I gotta say you’re probably selling yourself short or have unrealistic expectations of a partner.
  Remember that whoever you’re going to date is a person, not a robot. People are not quantifiable. One day they may be a dick, the next they may be pleasant. Some people are willing to compromise and others aren’t. Man, woman, or other, it doesn’t matter. If you’re not willing to compromise something, you’re never going to find someone.
- So you're saying there's a chance
- Yall need to lower your expectations god damn
- That seems absurdly low. Are you sure that all of your criteria are non-negotiable? And entirely uncorrelated?
- I only need to make 1 assumption to solve that equation for me
  0% of people would find me attractive
  QE fucking D
- Wouldn't be a problem if someone took dating as seriously as Skyscanner takes flight tickets.
- I'm curious about the math you did to come to that final number
Honestly if you lower your standards it gets pretty easy.
- I will absolutely not.
  (Just on a note, looks only are a minor priority, if at all.)
- People say this all the time, but I've never really understood it. You can't help who you are attracted to. Do a lot of people just have relationships with people they don't find attractive?
  I don't find like 99.9999% of people attractive. So I never really bothered attempting to date. I don't blame people for it like an incel would...it's just a slightly unfortunate thing that means I'm incompatible with other human beings. The few times I tried, it felt awkward and bad that I couldn't reciprocate what the other person felt. It felt like lying and I'm not really sure what I was supposed to be getting out of something like that.
  Legitimately curious.
That's the boat I'm in, except that I'm also gay and the popular trend is poligamy. :) Fml
AND who is equally kinky
- Give it time. Sometimes they can start out vanilla and warm to the idea of kinks through your relationship. Usually those kind of things aren’t set in stone.

I feel like this meme was made by a gen z kid that grew up with filtered pictures being normal

I'm gen z but my problem is mostly that I tend to be attracted to my friends more... Which kinda limits the pool. Whoops.
- It limits the pool for sure but when it works it works real good. Good luck to you.
- Honestly this is the best way.

now imagine being gay and the dating pool is 90% smaller.

Be ace and the dating pool is 100% smaller.
rip
Now imagine dating exclusively in the furry fandom (while also being gay)
E: rawr, shoot your shot if this matches you :p
- You top?

I'm bi myself and a shut in. How do you find people in general I don't know.

From what I understand if you just stay in front of the computer that they will magically manifest inside your home.
- Amazing, I'll just keep doing that thanks.
- I've heard that it also goes faster if you complain about women being evil and stupid on the computer.

Over the years of talking with my wife about who we find attractive, she has realized I find almost all women attractive in some ways and normally the ones that are supposed to be attractive i find less attractive. She hated this realization because she applied it to herself, and it made her feel bad... I just find the good in most people, that's all!

There’s a coworker of mine that when the topic arises and he gets asked what is his preference (in terms of the types of women he likes) his response is “women” 😂
- he likes: big girls, pretty kitty girls, really witty girls, singin' ditty girls; he likes the leggy girls with the nice thighs; he likes a good chest no matter what size; he likes the belly folds, he likes the sixpacks, really tall queens, and the shortstacks, from the mild girls to the wild girls...
  yea
  he likes girls

Idk i find like 80% of women i know attractive, its just that i have such confidence problems i dont ask anybody out.

Remember, if you find them attractive that means they're out of your league!
/s

The upper one depicts the guys around me. I can go through the lower one, but the result is usually this.

Especially since I'm gay

"That's a man, man!"
"Austin, that's my mother!"
"Well you have to admit, she does look a bit man-ish..."

That's been something hard about transitioning, being aware of how fewer and fewer people find me attractive the further I go. Ah well, it's not like I was going to find a partner anyways, looks really never came into play in the first place.

... or worse: becoming only more "attractive" to chasers

If you like each other and you share most values, there is your partner. If your partner is good looking as well; great for you guys!

Ah the classic "date someone I don't find attractive", a famously stable long term strategy. We'll just ignore that whole critical issue of intimacy. Right right right.
- Ya, the meme is trash, but attraction is important. It may evolve or surprise you, but it is relevant.
- Based ml take

you, standing on a cliff overlooking the horizon, and ten billion light-years away there is a point you will never, ever be physically capable of reaching because the very expansion of the cosmic medium itself will move it further away from you than it already is now even if you traveled in that direction at the speed of light for ten billion years.

caption: finding a girl who finds YOU attractive

Ratioed