Try and be upfront with people about my identity from the start to avoid that awkward 3 dates in & suddenly theyre spewing TERF shit at me.
Beyond that ive found most my relationship successes to be from friendships that develop into something else (most often with a fellow gender queer person).
Just make it obvious that you're trans. Like on my dating profile I say that I am trans and that I am on HRT. I have the trans flag emoji in my bio also and two pictures of me with a trans flag. If they don't know that I'm trans then that's on them for not bothering to look at my profile for more than 1 second.
NSFW.. duh
I don't like being erect, which a combination of Estrogen, and occasionally tucking tape, has made almost a non issue at this point. Its also likely that since over 2 years ago, I've also intentionally begun to attrophy(?), which estrogen appears to have sped up (only been on it less than 2 months). Basically, I stopped masturbating while erect, which was easy because it was so dysphoric, and I am still able to orgasm regularly through less traditional means. (I'm aware some people use chastity equipment for this purpose, but I did not, and I don't know the long term effects of such devices)
My cis GF "fingers" my soft equipment, which can be felt in prostate somewhat as well as nerves at the skin surface, and I can can "O" for over a minute straight, once was even over two minutes. The few people I've attempted to explain this to IRL are always confused, so im not great at explaining it. (If you have Questions, feel free) Also, I'm still open to anal sex, which shouldn't need further details lol.
I plan on having a vaginoplasty within a year or two at most which will be nice, but for the moment, I've got a healthy sex life and am happy with it.
Surface level warning that you probably already know, but I'm an anxious individual: Vaginoplasty uses penile tissue for depth, so if you let it atrophy, you're losing depth. Not a dealbreaker, but just in case, you should know.
Other than that... What do you mean people are confused? What about? I'm confused 😅
FYI: this is not true of PPTV (peritoneal pull-through vaginoplasty), which seems to be one of the better vaginoplasty techniques currently, as it's less finicky than the type of vaginoplasty that uses penis skin.
I don't. 😩 I've had relationships before my egg cracked, but I've been alone for a while now. And being alone is lonely.
I've never been with a guy, but I really want a guy to do things to me. But I need bottom surgery to fulfill some of these desires. I made a related meme recently, but I've been too nervous to share it. Mentally, I just kinda feel like a mess.
Edit: finally posted the meme
Basically, I only date other trans people.
For me, the cis/trans divide is too big when it comes to understanding each others experiences in the early stages of a relationship. Doubly so for non queer partners.
It's made more complicated by the fact that I'm panromantic, but heterosexual. So the majority of people I'm attracted to are people who have no personal relationship with their own queerness, yet they are the last people I want to be in a relationship with.
Yup, I mainly date queer people too. I pretty much only go for bi or pan women at this point. There's just an additional element of comfort that dating queer people provides.
Hey, cis straight guy in a relationship with a trans girl here and I wanted to chip in with my experience.
Yeah, early stages of the relationship are tough because you come from completely different backgrounds. With enough time and most importantly good communication however, that challenge can certainly be overcome.
Unfortunately, it's more than communication. Cishet men aren't queer, and that's a bit of a show stopper.
I'm moving in with a trans roommate soon, and I'm going to follow her lead. Basically make lots of connections in the local queer and kink communities, where people tend to be more open-minded. Put yourself out there, attend events, engage, take chances, be a part of the community.
Reconsider your options and desires, experiment. I am close to starting my first polycule. Five years ago, I wouldn't have believed that. Really exciting time.
I will have sex with cis people, but I suspect my heart can only truly belong to other trans people <3
