if you could fight one person – living or dead – without suffering legal consequences, who would you choose?

Probably dead, be a much easier fight that way

You didn't let the real question even touch you right? 💀

Jesus, just for the bragging rights.

(Many scholars believe him to be a real person, but with a bit overstating and inaccurate literature associated with him)

BUT if he was real and actually worked as a carpenter, he may be super jacked, even without any magical powers.
- Yeah, have you seen him up on that cross? Dude is shredded.
- Idk that anybody from the era of regular famines can qualify as 'jacked'

Trump. I have relevant experience.

Careful, known crotch grabber.
Experience destroying Cheetos?

Tucker Carlson.

Partially because of his extreme Backpfeifengesicht, but mostly for his Backpfeifenpersonality.

the ceo of poverty

He usually went by "Ronald Reagan"
Unfortunately, that's Mike Tyson.

Rupert Murdoch.

I think he has single-handedly done more to screw our generation and planet than anyone else could or would do.

Plus, I'm reasonably confident I would win, which is a big plus.

+1. I don't even wanna fight him - just a single punch to his stupid face would make me feel a lot better.

Ronald Regan on live TV.

Dead Regan or live Regan? I'd pay good money to see you dig up his corpse and whoop it's ass.
The dude was kinda built though.
- Ronald Regan at the end of his second term then.
- Ronald Reagan uses Secret Service. It's very effective!

How has nobody said Hitler or Stalin? You bunch of Communist Nazis.

Lenin. I've seen his body he's a little bitch
- He had some debilitating disease at the end.
Stalin would kick my ass.

Think I'd try wrestling with Kaufman.
- Hitler got that crackhead energy from all the drugs he on and is a war veteran too. He gonna be scrappy in a fight. And i dont wanna have to go the rest of my life knowing i lost to a man with one testicle.
I was wondering the same thing lol. I'll take on Hitler. Maybe use a bat like in that one scene in Inglourious Basterds
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I’m still holding on to a bit of animosity towards that guy Spez.

Mitch McConnell. I'd slap his turtle head right back into it's shell.

Anyone living or dead? Definitely dead. I think I could reliably win a fight against a dead guy.

That’s what they always say, but no one considers the starting conditions.

Imagine you’re fighting a dead fat guy. Sounds easy, right? 300kg of dead weight just waiting for you to bury your fists in it.

But now imagine the fat guy starts next to you, standing. Can you stop 300kg of dead flabby dude from burying you? Didn’t think so. You’re gonna die a gruesome suffocating death under some guy’s quadruple chin because you didn’t consider the implications.

Come on. Be better, people.
What are the losing conditions for a dead person?

I think they have more stamina than you

Ron DeSantis.

I'm angrier at Rupert Murdoch, but DeSantis would have more of a positive effect.

Matt Walsh. As much shit as that guy talks about LGBTQ people = groomers, you just know that this gross fucking turd has some interesting "research" saved on his hard drive. Outside of Steven Crowder I've never seen someone project so hard as this creep

I know I probably won't win a fight with most adults, so I'd probably go with Stephen Hawking in his wheelchair just so I can easily win.

Though, if it's him in his prime I'd have to fight, I'd change my answer to just any old random baby that died of SIDS just so I can win and feel good about it.

Bruh

The actor that played Grandpa Joe.

I like your style

Gotta beat Henry Kissinger to death with my bare hands

Woodrow Wilson. Id probably lose, but as long as i got a solid hit in at least itd feel worth it. Fuck Woodrow Wilson.

I thought there was nobody I'd like to fight, but I was wrong. I totally agree with you. Fuck Woodrow Wilson. I actually have a shirt that says that.

Helen Keller

This also holds the hidden potential for the most-humiliating defeat, though.
- 😨
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peter thiel

About 75,000 years ago humans almost went extinct. I'd fight whomever their John Conner was.

Their John Connor was you coming back in time to try to save them.
- Its a twist!

Fucking Abbott. He started the ruining of women's abortion rights after roe v wade was overturned and everyone followed suit. I'd fight Kemp too cause he's also ruining things. My friends are afraid of dying form bot being able to get an abortion and child victims of rape don't have access anymore.

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Would you be snuggled up in bed with him?

No legal consequences? So I could beat them to death?

Easy. Kissinger. The fact he's still breathing doesn't look good for any religion or spirituality's beliefs.

French president Chirac, for laying waste to my home and its members.

Abraham Lincoln.

Not for any reasons against the man, or the expectation that I have even half a hope of getting a solid strike in, but I've read of the man's fighting and wrestling experience. They like bringing up his long build as an advantage.

Me and Lincoln are going to fight the proper Orang way. On the deck of a ship in open waters, with a single knife each. We can come to an agreement on victory conditions.

Nice try Tyler. I pick Gandhi.

Shoving Robert Moses into a locker

Just fight? Nobody. Fight to death? Probably Putin, Xi Jinping, Kim Jong Un or Ali Hosseini Khamenei.

Roger stone. Cut that Nixon tattoo right out of his back.
careful, Putin is a blyat belt

Nice try, fbi

Ben Shapiro or Rupert Murdoch.

Idk man, have you seen Benny Boy's guns?

Anne Frank, I’m a cautious guy when it comes to fighting

Zaslav. You don't get to just take away Batgirl. Honestly, I don't even care about the legal consequences part of this question. I would sucker punch that man at noon on the courthouse steps given the opportunity. And at my hearing for early release, I'd do it again.

"Gandhi" - Narrator

Elon Musk, he's taller but I'm fitter and younger. Winner gets all the money.

Can I fight myself? Like a clone, not like Fight Club or Liar Liar.

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Assuming that I'm allowed to kill, and that the person would historically die at the age I fight them:

Living: Ali Hosseini Khamenei. I believe of all tyrants in the modern world, only his death would be productive, due to the existing societal unrest. Cunts like Putler, Xi and Kim would just get instanly replaced, killing Ali might actually topple or atleast destabilise the regime.
Dead: Hitler. No comment.

Otherwise:

Living: Putin. I hate the petite mouthbreather and whooping his Funko Pop-sized ass is going to feel orgasmic. (besides, he's so old and fragile by now that even if I don't kill him, he might get brain damage or straight up die from the beating later).
Dead: Bruce Lee. No point, but it'd be fun as fuck.

EDIT: Formatting and spelling.

Kautsky, just so Lenin would think I was cool

Gloria Steinem

Khutulun

Peter Brabeck-Letmathe. Water should be a human right. Could you imagine how much shit we could get done if thirst and hunger no longer existed?