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Yuritopiaposadism [none/use name] @hexbear.net

2y ago

What if Pokémon was American?

https://www.pcgamesn.com/palworld/early-access-date

27 comments

old enough to remember this
- now you see the violence inherent in the pokesystem
Oh God you made me remember the trailer. Shit was fucking batshit insane.
How batshit one may ask? Pokemon doing forced labor at a gun factory batshit :agony:
- Pokemon yearn the coal mines
  
  Pokemon Firing Squad Red
- You should watch the introducing videos for each kind of ~~Pokémon~~ pal.
  The sheep one is like “aww look at the fluffy sheep!” “ now imagine if you indiscriminately struck them with cluster munitions!”
  E: the video lol
  
  This is so nuts it might just wrap back around to being good?
  
  I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:
  yewtu.be
  inv.zzls.xyz
  yt.artemislena.eu
  piped.video
isn't this just Digimon?
- Or Transformers / GoBots.
  Or Care Bears, if we're being particularly generous.
Can’t you also enslave and eat the Pokémon in this?
- you do that in normal pokemon. you capture them, breed them, trade them like chattel and use them for pit fights. You bring Oak excess captured pokemon and he gives you back a corresponding amount of that pokemon's "candy" that you feed to your pokemon to EV train them.
  
  Regular Pokémon doesn’t show you slaughtering and processing miltank into steaks that you’re then shown eating.
- It's not "enslaving", it's exchanging labor in exchange for room and board!
Palworld features an opioid balancing mini game. Because healthcare is neither free nor universal, you have to seek out street drugs to soothe your Pals’ pain. Too much and you gotta abandon it by the side of the road and start over.
- I was about to expand on this but because I found it funny af, then it just became extremely depressing the more I wrote
Its developer is Japanese actually. What if Pokémon was Japanese? Oh wait
I have waited for what feels like years to be the very best deranged palworld trainer. I am so excited to commit crimes against palmanity.
that could be genuinely cool though if it has proper worldbuilding. Maybe you are a member of the Pal Revolution and, despite the usual avoidance of traditional weaponry in Pal Battles, have begun using them to attack and upend the ruling classes (trainers)?
All of the Pals follow you voluntarily because you read Marx? Maybe you do quick monkey wrenching attacks on Pallyball factories?
Nooooo, I just started playing graveyard keeper; I want this one too but it'll need just as much attention if not more.
Small mercy though: with early access I can justify ignoring it for now until it's out of EA and then worry about giving it attention.
"What if pokemon but gun?"
Hasn't every shitty top 10 video answered this already:
Next there will be a lavender town syndrome game and a computer warrior Porygon simulator.
- Okay, but I'd play those too
pokemon nursery shooting
Looking forward to pirating this and seeing how wild it is
"Say the line Earl, or you'll get the gas"

27 comments