Trump Attempts To Soften Image With New Airbrushed JCPenney Beauty Shots
Trump Attempts To Soften Image With New Airbrushed JCPenney Beauty Shots
TRAVERSE CITY, MI—In an effort to reach out to swing voters crucial to his reelection bid, former President Donald Trump reportedly attempted to soften his image Friday by distributing airbrushed JCPenney beauty shots of himself at a campaign rally. “Here you go, these are nice glossies of the presi...
"And it didn't break the bank, either".
The Onion's still got it.
I was about to say that this doesn't belong on not the onion because this is totally realistic. Then I realized this was the onion
At least you didn’t eat the onions at McDonalds
At least it wasn't just me.
I didn't bite the onion on this one, but only because it's too TAME. Real life is much crazier than this.
If it were a realistic kind of crazy, he would have done the photo shoot in Florida with alligators, and lost a finger.
And his devotees would have cut off their own fingers in solidarity.
I think the JC Penney photos would actually work with swing voters. They just need a reason to not be ashamed to vote for him.
Maybe, but then the uber tough guy fascist sorts might say he's gone soft. Not that it would turn the to Harris but might stay home.
There's a picture of me as a kid holding a baby alligator. You can just tape their mouth shut, the jaw muscles to open their mouths are weak, it's closing their mouth that can crunch bone. I'm not sure the gators like it much though, lol.
On a tangentially related note, check out Gatorland if you're ever in Orlando. It's a fun time and one of the few remaining old Florida tourist attractions and a perennial field trip destination for the local school kids, that's why I've been there several times.
It would have been Hugo Boss.
Kin Jong Un approves!
It's hard to look beautiful when you still have reverse raccoon eyes lol
Really captured his neck vagina with that soft light
Now to finish off this new look he needs to do a sears catalog underwear shoot.
How long do you think it'll be until that picture gets circulation by his cult?
Am I the only one who has such a disgust for this man that I can’t find any joke involving him funny?