Yeah, Satan, im starting to get it.

Man you got my hopes up that he had died for a second. Don't do that.

What replaces him might be worse
- People always say that about everything that changes. Not saying they're wrong, but.. they might be. I'll take "might be worse" over "is definitely a cunt."

For most of us, we've had to live our entire lives watching wealthy assholes like Trump do anything they want, while we work shitty jobs, barely get by, and are held to a completely different legal and moral standard.

We're already in hell.

I don't think there's any version of heaven from any major religion where Trump would qualify. I don't even think he'd qualify for the Ferengi version of heaven.

He's a seriously bad negotiator and poor businessman, he's going to a Ferenghi hell, those are major sins
The Ferengi would mock him mercilessly, he is a cheap fraud and doesn't have the lobes for business.

Lee Harvey Oswald was pretty much American's most hated man when they found out he shot Kennedy. I'm absolutely not saying anyone should try to shoot Trump, but I guess if someone were to do it, they would likely gain Mangione-type fame.

Unfortunately his cult will call him a martyr. The best thing that could happen is for him to have a stroke or something. I mean the conspiracy nuts will still be themselves, but largely his movement will eat itself, at least in the short term. That's usually how cults work. It's very rare for them to outlive their founding jackass. I saw a dissertation once on how their replacement needs to be a charismatic organizer to reform it into a lasting movement, which is very rare.
Politically, JD Vance will be basically a puppet for the Republican party; he already lacks his own personality, ethics of any kind, and any kind of significant characteristics other than "opportunistic sociopath."

Don't get my hopes up. That's not nice at all.

My heart fluttered for a second, then I realized I’d have heard honking and probably gun fire if he’d died.

Oh I'll flip off the doorman to heaven and walk into hell with my head held high. Fuck the Tyrant god.

I'm ok with Trump going to heaven as long as it's soon.

He can get in as long as he can provide a single quote from the Bible. I'm reasonably confident that will prove to be enough of a barrier to entry.

Him dying will be the best thing he’s ever done

You don't need to choose between the two. You can just "be". Don't let them limit your life with their ideologies.

I get you. Its satire, so no worries.

You misunderstand. We ARE in hell.

Meh, could be more hellish. 5/10
- You're just not using the app to it's full potential.

As long as he is somewhere else.

Trump will burn in hell for sure

he will be sent to purgatory then to hell.

That reminds me of this song: https://youtu.be/YvBwwtUrtvk