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Ask Lemmy @lemmy.world

Ghostalmedia @lemmy.world

1mo ago

Countertop banana stand owners - what do you do when you only have one banana?

50 comments

Just buy more bananas. How much could a banana cost? $10?
- Well, in the US they are almost there with eggs...
- There's always money in the banana stand
- The pricey ones here cost €1 per kg
  
  I worked at a Walmart for a bit and one day they had me change the price tags on the bananas and I immediately had to ask and make sure the tags were correct because they went from like $0.70 per pound, to $1.68 per banana.
  Until they went back to a per pound price, banana sales basically stopped at the store.

You can cut the second to last banana a little lower, and leave the top of the stim attached to keep it hanging
- Until I read your answer, I was picturing a kiosk selling frozen bananas with a countertop (a diner would be a countertop restaurant, in this naming convention). My only excuse is that I just woke up
  
  Same, same.
  Ah, now I have coffee.
- Wait you cut them all? You don't just tear the bananas apart from each other?
  Cutting, a stand, all feels like an overcomplication of a simple fruit
  
  Uhh, see the banana master JWBananas diagram below. Exactly what I'm talking about

There's always money in the banana stand to get more bananas.
- It's one banana, how much could it cost, $10?
  
  Just use those $10 and go see a star war.

I read this as being addressed to owners of businesses that sell bananas off a countertop and had an existential crisis wondering how the fuck I never realized that was a thing
Let alone why it'd be an issue for them to have only a single banana left in stock

RTFM.
- What's this "nature's way" crap, when the bananas are hanging upside down?
  
  As though there is anything natural about the modern banana
  
  Banana stand people: hang loose man!
  Actual bananas: <flips like 50 birds to the camera>
- This is the way. Cut the second to last banana below the stem. Works perfectly.

Eat it.

I think we're all missing the most important question here: where do you get someone small enough to work the countertop banana stand?!?
- You make a trade with someone from the actors guild.
  Banana for scale.
- Loompaland?
  
  After they unionized? No way.

The arm of our stand is wide so I can rest one banana on top.
- Banana cradle capabilities?
  
  A banana hammock, if you will

Mine it for potassium-40. Radioactive products sell for more than one banana, which as others have noted cost $10 but if you can purify the radioactive elements, you can probably get $11 or even $12.
- Plus, the YouTube revenue. Imagine me and Nile Red turning a banana into something where we get a visit from the Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory. They’d pay upwards of $14.50.

Sometimes a rubber band, sometimes a twist tie

Just lay out on the counter and eat it the next day. Sorry, boring as answer

I heard countertop banana stand owners tend to also own banana hammocks.
- I'm going to buy a banana stand, and knit a hammock to hang from it.

Skewer it with the hook.

You rip the second-last one off to leave the stem, which now becomes a hook.

Cut it in half and tie the two ends together

Suffer

Impale it as an example to other bananas that might step out of line.

Just lay it on the base of the stand.

Eat the last two together

There's always money in the banana stand. Use the last banana for a free smoothie for your employee, or throw the rotton thing out and order more for tomorrow.

I'd invest into an economy of scale

I use better technology: wire fruit basket. It achieves the same goal of exposing your banana to air circulation, but the last one can lay down

Shove it up my ass. For safe keeping.

50 comments