No means no

I have to create files and email them as part of my job but I have no idea where those files are. There are multiple versions and i don't know where the cloud is. Where is file explorer? How do I save to desktop? Why are there multiple desktops? Where is my documents? I am so fucking lost and that file needs to be sent immediately so someone else knows what to do next. What training? I grew up on xp and the ribbon is incomprehensible hieroglyphics.
Im not joking. Where the fuck is the file I just saved to desktop? It's not on my fucking desktop and I saved to desktop because it's the only place on my work laptop I can reliably find. Oh, I sent the wrong version? Well where the fuck is the one i just edited? Somewhere in the cloud...

I think a lot of people need to just use WinAero. Get rid of the ads, the onedrive, Cortana, whatever else. Linux is great, but there's lots of people still tied to windows for whatever reason, and they should all tweak it. https://winaero.com/

I thought OneDrive deleted my Documents and Desktop folders until I realized it relocates them from C:\Users\you\ to C:\Users\you\OneDrive\.

Strange. I use windows 11 occasionally, and it's never even as much as mentioned onedrive to me. Could it be that it's a cracked install? Or that I never connected the local account to a microsoft account? Or that I'm in the EU?
Edit: Downvote? Really? Are you really that jealous that my windows experience is slightly less painful than yours!?
- Onedrive is easy to completely disable with group policy or registry tokens.
  
  Any guides you recommend people should follow?

If only windows just stuck to being an operating system and let you install things like one drive as plugins.
- Check out Windows Ameliorated

Linux is great
- In Linux you can actually (un)install features you want (or don’t want) without the whole system breaking.
  Also: Why the hell does Microsoft Edge run in the background all of the time?!
  
  Edge runs in the background so it opens faster when you click a link somewhere. Chrome and more recently Firefox do the same.

See, I actually found OneDrive really useful with the whole integrations and coming with every Windows. The thing I don't appreciate is how pushy they are with it. Like holy shit michaelsoft, just let people do their thing.

My one drive won’t even let me access it I have no idea why and I am not about to take the time to figure it out lol
- First thing I ever do with a new computer is delete it.
  
  Somehow I interpreted your comment as this

If you gotta use windows, the IOT LTSC version of windows 10 and 11 do not have that shit. It's worth checking out. I have it dual-booted alongside Kubuntu. Very clean, very little bloatware besides their shitty browser, but you still have the updates that nag you. Otherwise, it makes windows usable again for people who don't want all of their "features".