How to scare the adults too

It only ever starts at 18% now

I have seen some non-table ones start at 10% for counter service.
Tipping is stupid and we should just pay servers and all other underpaid workers a living wage instead.
- Can I get a sanity check here? This came up last night. If I'm picking up a dozen wings at Wingstop, is a tip expected? If so, how much?
  When I used to make pizzas back in college, tips were for delivery drivers. So I never tip if I'm walking into a fast food place and picking up food. Am I being a dick?
And that's 18% of the post-tax cost.

Some hipster cunt tried this on me in Switzerland last week after charging me 5chf for a coffee

It's your fucking civic duty to press "NO" and get straight on Google maps, TripAdvisor whatever and leave a 1-star review for even attempting to normalise this shite

I can't be fucked leaving the reviews but it will always be the last thing I buy there.
If Americans want to do this shit that's up to them, I'm not paying the bar keeper 10% for pulling me a pint. If it's my local, I'll offer to buy them a drink now and again, I'm not doing that in a pub I may only go to once.
- Us Americans don't like it either, we would rather the company just fucking pay their employees instead hoarding money needlessly
- Leave. The fuckin. Review
  It takes thirty seconds and if you don't do it, we're fucked then you'll moan about it 😂

Shame for reusing the same pumpkin every year. Anymore it's 20% 23% 25%

How to scare the ~~adults~~ Americans too

FTFY, I love that in my third world country nobody loses their shit if you don't tip.

You scrape the skin off and put a bright light on there. The whole thing is solid.
- What?

Went for haircut yesterday, default minimum tip was 30%

There is no such thing as a minimum tip.
And if a place showed me a payment screen with 30% tip as the lowest option, I'd say "actually I changed my mind, this is ridiculous" and walk away.
- and that's why I always do custom tips with even dollar amounts.
- Do you guys get charged before the haircutting?

My brain doesn't like this image. I have to keep telling myself there is thin translucent connections holding the pieces in place further back in the pumpkin that I can't see.

It's not cut all the way through, the skin is more opaque than the meat inside so if you cut shallow cuts in the skin the light will shine through the parts you cut away the skin on.
- So your telling me they are infested with deamons and I need to crack out my ghost hunting tools!? Okay, maybe I read that differently than I was supposed to. Ugh, and here I thought I was going to get to borrow someone's old Kinect to investigate some pumpkins

I prefer the ones with the car dash warning icons on it

Sometimes it says

20% | 23% | 25%

Absolutely boils my piss that sometimes you don't get a choice of 0% and that it asks you while you're ordering your food! It's so blatantly a service charge but trying to guilt you into leaving a tip. Which daft bastards are giving more than the minimum? Who the fuck tips before they've even got their food and been served?

0 * 1.25 = 0, so why not?

For SOME reason, the "choose a different amount" selection doesn't work on Uber Eats...

Hold up, pumkins are supposed to be scary? I always thought they were cool as long as I can remember.

Charge me 60 bucks for an 8th and expect a tip

WTF is this 2008? A quarter should be 60

Wow everybody mad at people making poverty wages instead of the capitalists who haven't raised the minimum wage in decades while radically devaluing the currency. Gross.