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Get a bidet, Lemmy

I’ve got two in my house, both Totos. One was like $900 and the other around $350 at Costco. The Costco one is more than enough. Should have saved some money!
- You could've saved a heckuva lot more money. I have two in my house as well, both were about $45 each and those were the luxury versions! My old ones were about $25.
  They're non-electric LUXE Bidet brand, activated solely by water pressure when you turn the dial on them. No fancy bells and whistles, but they have pretty decent water pressure and get the job done.
- We have one $450 Toto and one cheap one from Luxe that currently sells on Amazon for $63. I actually prefer the Luxe because it sprays harder. It just uses the ambient water pressure while the Toto self-pressurizes. I think my wife prefers the Toto because of the other functions like the heated seat and the preheated water.
  When I have to poop away from home I feel like a barbarian. I seriously miss the bidets when I travel or have to poop at work.
Then how will I tell if my insides are bleeding?
- With your fingers 🙂
If only I had power next to my toilet 😭
(No I'm not using cold water; I'm cold enough already)
- Honestly cold water is not bad. If that's your deal breaker find a $30 Bidet attachment and give it a try.
- Get an extension cord?
- There are actually hot-water ones that don't use power. They use a second water hose to connect to the hot water pipe under your sink. I've never used one though, so can't comment on how nice/unnice they are to use - but the LUXE 320 seems set up for that
- Usually there’s power in a bathroom. We run a long extension cable and hide it with these covers that run along our molding.
Okay! But fair warning I'm the opposite of handy
- It's remarkably easy and cheap ($40 or so). Just have to turn off the valve for the water intake to the toilet, connect the bidet, and reconnect the intake. It'll change your life.
- Good luck!

Wait what?

Booty blood.
- I still don't fucking get it.

http://www.bccancer.bc.ca/screening/colon/who-should-screen

Where I'm located, screening is recommended for people 50 years old and above. Check the recommendations and process for your location (or ask your primary care doctor when you can).

Also note that if you're already having symptoms like the post mentions:

Screening is only recommended for people who are not experiencing symptoms that may indicate colon cancer. Symptoms can include blood in your stool, abdominal pain, change in bowel habits, or unexplained weight loss. If you are experiencing these symptoms, talk to your health care provider about a referral for diagnostic testing to determine the cause of these symptoms.

It's worth noting for everyone who might be reading this that blood on your toilet paper is 99.9% of the time from hemorrhoids or wiping too much, not from colon cancer. You're looking for dark stool and all these other symptoms, not a tiny amount of bright red blood on your toilet paper.
- And the rest of the symptoms listed can be literally anything. I remember experiencing some symptoms and looked it up and of course everything says cancer. Went to three different doctors and the only thing they really said is that I have an anxiety problem lol.
  I don’t look up symptoms anymore.
- IIRC it's not so much the color of the stool as it is the texture; grainy/gravelly texture implies internal bleeding
If you're high risk for any reason get screened earlier. I'm getting screened at 31 after digestive problems.
That screening saved my dads life