Carebear countdown

Sorry no... Just use that ray gun to blast people like Mitch McConnell and my depression will sort itself out.

There's nothing left to blast in ol' Mitch, he's already been running on fumes for way too long.
- Yet there is something still running.
  Something that can be blasted
What happened to his crusty ass since the bout of freezing anyway? GOP shove him in a corner out of view?

I feel like a brightly colored teddy bear that hides in your kitchen to shoot you with a memory erasure ray to change who you are as a person is the most MKULTRA thing ever.

and trust me, when someone who can't stop thinking about that shit starts getting optimistic and looking at silver linings, people get, WAY more upset than they do when we just point out how fucked everything is. like seeing the silvery edges of the mushroom cloud is way more disturbing than the death toll.

Response to top section:

Rather than erase the memory and teachings of negativity, wouldn't it be more beneficial for them to show how and why that thinking isn't necessarily productive? Help us realize that while there are forces and consequences out of our control, we can accept that it's part of our lives and take it in stride. Establish a dialogue and guidelines that can be passed along by others. Allow us to seek out a path for ourselves... [CARE BEAR STARE]

ALL HAIL HYPNO- I MEAN CARE BEARS!

Bottom section:

I'm for it.

A...accept? Might as well ask WW2 Japan to surrender. I am personally responsible for every little thing that has ever happened to me, no matter how tangentially related it is to my life!
- I mean, WW2 Japan did eventually surrender.
So now the show is going to be about the civil war among the care bears about the best way to fight negativity.
- And 1 on lithium un-Caring about the whole situation.

where they help young adults and millennials deal with feelings of depression, disillusionment, and cynicism?

You mean by eradicating the Parasite Class, dismantling vampire/vulture Capitalism, crashing the housing market by 75+%, and closing the wealth gap, thereby giving them a future that is not only affordable but also worth living and striving for?

That sounds absolutely wonderful.

"Care Bears as eco-terrorists" is a pitch that would get my butt in a theatre.
I'm all for it

Monday morning, my alarm goes off. As I reach to turn it off I see a bright pink teddy bear standing at my bedside. Before I can react it blasts me in the face with a ray of pure happiness as I forget that wages have not been keeping pace with productivity or inflation.

You have to come up with new characters though. I have a few ideas:

Still Lives With Parents at 35 Bear
Will Never Be Able To Retire Bear
Paying Back Student Loans Until You Die Bear
We're All Going To Be Dead in 30 Years From Climate Change Anyway Bear

Paying Back Student Loans Until You Die Bear We're All Going To Be Dead in 30 Years From Climate Change Anyway Bear
Those two are twins, right?

This is literally where Bronies came from 13 years ago

Jesus Christ, that was 13 years ago already 😨

"You've just got to learn to love, Asafum!"

What did you say to me you fuzzy fuck? You can't love anything when you loathe existing, when the only thing you want is the sweet release into oblivion. How about you do the world a favor and take me out? Oh is that too harsh for you love bear?

Are you crying? Oh goddamn it I did it again...

Go next door, the Thompsons are good people they'll give you cookies or something.

Just stop doomscrolling. Stop using lemmy, instagram, facebook, YouTube, tiktok… that shit fucks with your mental health more than my abusive ex. You’re always looking for the next dopamine hit, and when it comes, you need another one, you just can’t stop.

Get through a week of withdrawal. I’ve limit myself to 15 minutes of lemmy a day.

It's good that OP mentioned that it's "furred". Otherwise, I could've mistaken it for a man.

Furred creatures also tend to be featherless.

It's called a "Care Bear Stare" because they just silently judge you with a good stern look. All the rainbow laser beams is just the affected person losing their shit.

I'm Ludovico Technique Bear and this is Conversion Therapy Bear

This is basically how meditation works

Speak for yourself - just makes things worse for me
- I'm an experienced meditator. Are you able to articulate why meditation doesn't work for you?

I watched Bee and Puppycat and it cured my millenial inherent nihilistic psycopathy and now I run a nonprofit animal rescue center plus bakery for dogs (I am allergic to dogs but they don't mind).

I want the Who? Cares Bears

How about not Care Bears.

Don't care bears
Intensive care bears
Healthcare beats
Daycare bears
Nightmare bears
- Healthcare Beats
  Surgeon playing the patient's rib cage like a xylophone during an operation
- Meh, maybe later bears