If you were a pasta, which one would you be and why?

Lasagne - I got layers.

That was graphic,yet eloquent.
- Sounded cheesy if you ask me.

Orzo. I always tried to be like someone I'm not. Now I'm neither rice nor pasta.

Or gnocchi!

Macaroni because I'm hollow inside, and unlike penne, have no point

Linguine. You're expecting some strong, has-it-together fettuccine, but instead I'm a plateful that can barely hold it together and is trying to play pretend at being one of the better pastas.

I love linguine though.
- I love lingerie though.

Fusilli, because I'm screwed

Spaghetti, because Im lanky, and annoying to handle when Im cooked

Wagon Wheel. Not because it's a good pasta. But because it's most likely to survive in the back of a pantry. Little to no sauce retention. Wagon wheel, for survival.

Little to no sauce retention
that's why you eat it with a spoon
RIP
- I've been doing it wrong this whole time.

Macaroni because I have an unhealthy obsession with cheese.

An impasta because I'm a human bean.

I will block out the sun with my lasagne body! All will fear me! All will obey me!

Shells. Because I'm less likely to get eaten.

Seriously though. Fuck shell pasta where they all stick together

Fantastic for seafood dishes

Homemade ricotta gnocchi, because I'm rare and not from around here.

Fusilli, I'm cork-y like that and rather silly.

I wish to be spaghetti but at the moment am feeling more like penne.

Tri-color Rotini, since my color would be the first thing people noticed around all the other pasta.

Copypasta, nothing more I want to be than a long overused block of text that clogs up threads all over the net.

I am also partial to shell pasta.

If Lemmy has a million fans, then I am one of them. If Lemmy has ten fans, then I am one of them. If Lemmy has only one fan then that is me. If Lemmy has no fans, then that means I am no longer on earth. If the world is against Lemmy, then I am against the world.
- If Lemmy has a million fans, then I am one of them. If Lemmy has ten fans, then I am one of them. If Lemmy has only one fan then that is me. If Lemmy has no fans, then that means I am no longer on earth. If the world is against Lemmy, then I am against the world.

Bow tie pasta/Farfalle cuz I'm goofy

(I used to love eating those raw when I was little, how my teeth weren't affected is something for an episode of Unsolved Mysteries.)

Any, really. As long as I can use my noodle.

The screwed one

My brother in Fusilli!

I would be mushroom bowtie farfalle (which I enjoy often) because I'm always just out of reach, even to myself.

Mafaldine because I look cute with little ruffles and there's nothing remotely straight about me

Macaroni, but only with cheese.

This is so that I can become ouroboros and infinitely devour myself

a sad lasagne: used in pretty much a single dish; it is the least enjoyable part of the said dish; it can very easily be substituted for, don't know, eggplants

I'd love to say campanelle, because I'm fun and stuff.

I'm a gnocchi, because I'm potato.

Orichiette. Cause they're like little bowls of sauce on their own. Each one of them a tiny flavour universe.

I'm all ears

If Lemmy has a million fans, then I am one of them. If Lemmy has ten fans, then I am one of them. If Lemmy has only one fan then that is me. If Lemmy has no fans, then that means I am no longer on earth. If the world is against Lemmy, then I am against the world.
Edit: Is this not a "copy pasta"? Woosh
- Yes..?