Hockey

Canadian couples only have sex doggy-style, so they can both watch the hockey game.

As an added bonus, I can also use my wife's lower back to rest my poutine. She says it provides a nice warming sensation.
- That way you enjoy your poutine as you enjoy poutine.
Followed by X-Files of course.
- They're only mammals after all.

Football pitches are often for size comparisons here in the UK.

We use American football fields here in the USA.
- India where you at?
Same in Germany, and, for much larger areas, Saarlands are used as a comparison

Neutral Zone Kush hits hard.

Did someone say turnover? 'Cause I've got the munchies
- They should start calling Canadian pre rolls 'one timers'

Because saying "A square 14m x 14m" is too confusing somehow... I hate when they do it for huge surfaces though, like for forest fires as people don't comprehend big numbers like "100 000 football fields", but they sure can understand that 100km is a long distance so a 100km x 100km square is fucking huge.

Did you see that astroid that was hundreds of lions wide?
- It weighed the same as the amount of jello ppwder required to make five Olympic swimming pools full of jello.
- No, but I did see the one that was a million antlions across.

Can't even enjoy a sport anymore😮‍💨

It's...beautiful. Sniff.

Makes sense. I'll never know how big 'a football field' is as I've never seen one. I assume it's just under half a hectare (which is 1 hectometer on a side).

Including end zones, an American football field is precisely 360 feet long and 160 feet wide, or approximately 110m x 50m. The area is 1.32 acres.
It's precisely defined so I'm okay with it being used as an area of length or area, especially since virtually all Americans have personal experience with football fields, having at the very least been required to run four laps of the quarter-mile track you usually find wrapped around one.
I know they're at least 100 yards long. And a yard is about the same as a meter.

standard North-American sized

Can we please standardize handling of dashes in multi-word adverb-adjective phrases?

Option 1: North American-sized (most common)
Option 2: North-American sized (as seen in the article)
Option 3: North-American-sized (makes most sense to me)
Option 4: North American sized (Edit: added based on @robocall@lemmy.world's comment)

There is a standard, compound modifiers preceding the noun. There are also exceptions, proper nouns and their transformations don’t get hyphenated.
Phrases containing a proper noun should not be hyphenated.
- Joke's on you, there is no noun
None of them need dashes. I guess two is my favorite if I have to have a dash.

What a terrible measurement. They have to put in the title and margins the size of the rink just so people can understand it

I can't dunk too hard on a country with federally legal weed.

Or just say 14 by 14 meters?

The regulation appears to be based on the area of the plot, not the dimensions. By assigning explicitly annotated dimensions it can confuse the intended message more than using a goofy but useful analogy.