LeylaLove [she/her, love/loves] @ LeylaLove @hexbear.net

Posts

156

Comments

1,168

Joined

2 yr. ago

Moderating

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The difference is that these people don't make hating women their personalities and political projects. These 4chan type misogynists are clearly having a different impact on young men than mainstream misogyny. Chris Brown beats women, but he wouldn't celebrate someone like Elliot Rodgers trying to go on a killing spree of women. Incels are developing into terrorism and leaking into mainstream misogyny.

There's nothing wrong with you, and that doesn't make you an incel. I had a lot of these feelings when I was younger too. The difference between not getting laid and being an incel is the mindset you have. An incel uses their loneliness to fuel their loneliness and hatred towards other people. A normal person just gets a bit down about it. You don't have to play defense for hateful people because you're not included in that group unless you choose to be.

I feel for the people who just can't find companionship. It is hard in this capitalist hellscape to find it. But ultimately the best way to find that companionship is to get out there. I do pretty well on queer dating apps, high rates of neurodivergence and more leftism than normal dating apps, albeit still a lot of libs. Maybe you'll find someone on a discord server. I know long distance stuff kinda sucks, but it can be nice to have someone to fall asleep on call with and have that be your little "snuggle" fix.

Something I think you should remind yourself though is that you're often romanticizing romance. Many people in relationships are in messy relationships that they shouldn't be in. My last relationship existed, but was absolutely horrible for me. I was in that relationship because I felt the need to not be alone, and it destroyed me. Just put yourself out there in your own way, and you'll find someone eventually. Feel free to be a little flirty, as long as you're able to shut it down if someone asks you to.

Why are you implying that homeless people and heroin addicts are at the same level of worth as pedophiles?

So are you an incel?

It's not shaming them for not performing patriarchal masculinity, it's shaming them for hating women. You are being disingenuous if you think that's all we hate incels for.

Okay, I'm a schizophrenic alcoholic, I have all the excuses in the world to self isolate and hate people. But even when I was drinking up to a gallon of vodka a day, I still had the option of going to meetings, going to therapy, getting on psych meds, being friends with my coworkers, ect. Acting like there's "NOTHING WE CAN DO CAPITALISM RUINED EVERYTHING" is the self defeatist mindset that made me an alcoholic. So your speech is stupid and causing psychic damage to everybody that reads it.

Also to counter you mentioning me getting therapy and other such help is "privilege" I got that for free. There are still programs to get help for free, you just have to actually seek them. They still suck and are clearly held back by capitalism, but they exist. There is no excuse not to work on being a better person for your community and those around you other than not giving a fuck. I learned that from the immigrants I work with in kitchens that have 3 full time jobs and families they still take care of and spend time with.

I was always politically aware because of my Dad, but he was a libertarian/conspiracy bro so he passed on a lot of those brain worms. I didn't become a communist until I was about 17, and even then I had a lot of brain worms to get rid of. Still do, but honestly I'm pretty happy with where I am now with that. The libertarian brain worms were definitely preferable to other brain worms because I was already against imperialism and other parts of the American empire that mainstream politics wouldn't have had me be against.

A lot of these people got radicalized into being incels by 4chan, a place where there are communists, albeit reactionary ones, but they had exposure to a lot of the same things that I did and still turned out that way.

Shit, the incel I knew personally even came out as a trans woman for a short amount of time. These people aren't stupid, they understand they have some level of agency over their life, but it's because of dipshits like you giving them the pass to say they have no agency over their life they can pretend they don't.

Okay, all these things apply to my life and I had the option to not be an incel. No need to play defense for incels this hard.

Actually, I was going to save it, but no, we've already had this struggle session on the site where it was made clear that this level of defense for incels makes femme users uncomfortable. Socializing doesn't come easy to me, all you did were list excuses for not developing social skills though. I used to be friends with people who were incels IRL, and they became that way because they got coddled by the men in their life into thinking it was okay to not develop socially and "uWu they're mentally ill it's not their fault" when it very much is. There is no excuse for viewing women as subhuman because you have so little social skills that you can't find someone else as socially inept as you and build a relationship from there.

This is on the same level as "uWu it wasn't Hitler's fault, he was just a product of his environment". That's a true statement, he was a product of his environment, doesn't make him any less deserving of our ridicule.

Bump amber whataboutism

For single player, Pokemon Legends Arceus is fantastic. It's the game that 8 year old me wanted when I said I wanted a Pokemon game on a home console. Almost all the Pokemon are catchable without buying anything else, with there being 2 that are locked behind missions unlocked by buying the other games. The game plays more like monster hunter than a traditional Pokemon game, using stealth, crafting, and pokemonless "combat" to get opportunities to catch them. Easily the most fun I've had with a video game since booting up Skyrim in middle school.

Bump amber whataboutism

I mean, addiction overlaps with mental health issues really heavily. For a while there was another schizophrenic person here, and she drove me up a wall to live with but she was at least self aware of her shortcomings. Like at one point she had me do her grocery shopping for her so she wouldn't just blow her food stamps on gas station shit and be depending on me for food for the rest of the month (cause you know, I wasn't just going to let her starve). She actually went to assisted living recently and I'm really glad, because blowing her food stamps at the gas station in a few days were the least concerning parts of her impulse control. As much as she drove me up a wall, I was more concerned for her wellbeing than I was for my own peace being around her if that makes sense.

Everybody else though? They're fairly functional people, they just don't care, and that's the annoying part. They're still kinda partially paralyzed in the addict lifestyle without the addiction. Honestly that's why those 12 step programs are so important, it's not that hard to stay sober for a few weeks, but if you're not improving yourself to work your way out of that addiction lifestyle/mindset, being sober just isn't worth it.

Bump amber whataboutism

Yeah, could be wrong here, but I've only ever heard of black rappers being banned from other countries. Tyler The Creator's earlier work got him banned from a few countries, while people like Eminem are just fine to go wherever

Bump amber whataboutism

Bump amber whataboutism

That's what I've been hearing about the case. I haven't followed the nitty gritty too closely, but know people who do. The general consensus I've gotten is that the prosecution came under prepared for as big of a case as they're trying to make. I'm also assuming that they got less evidence than they would get out of court because individual evidence has to be stronger when you're in court (at least if the defense lawyer is any good).

Reminds me of Casey Anthony's trial. Everybody was so pissed at that jury because it was so obvious that she did it, but if you see the case the prosecutors made against her it becomes very clear very quickly why she was found not guilty.

In short, fuck cops

Yeah, I'm trying to get out, because separate from shitty housemates, being in sober living has added a lot of uncertainty.

I had a relapse last week that ultimately wasn't that bad, I've even had multiple people tell me they don't count it as a relapse. Got some OTC cough syrup for a severe throat burn and ended up losing control of how much I was taking. This would have been no big deal if I wasn't in sober living, just don't do it again, but because I'm in sober living my housing was in question for a week. Thankfully the house manager was one of the people who said he didn't count it as a relapse, so I wasn't homeless, but I easily could have been homeless over a throat burn.

I do love f**** press