and you will be happy

"You're not being sacked, no, we are releasing you into a world of opportunity!" Yes, a friend of mine actually heard that one a while ago when he was 'let go'. 🤨

Got the boot from a company.

Here's the BS I had to deal with: -I was dealing with health issues when I was working. -My former coworker actively tried to make my condition worse. -I reported them for this to management & HR -Got fired, as they had friends in HR. -They filled out the unemployment paperwork wrong 4 times. -The unemployment case was so messed up, the local government got involved.

The positives. -Company deamed at fault and heavily scolded by the government. -I got paid more on unemployment than when working. -I make ~25% more at my new job.

That was ~2 years ago.

As someone who was recently laid off, I can identify. I didn’t see it immediately, but was able to travel to Arizona to catch some spring training baseball with my son and brother. That was all I needed to bounce back. On Monday I start a new job at a healthier company making 25% more money.

If it’s Amazon that’s laying you off, they’ll just shut down your email, Slack, and intranet access before you can start work in the morning, and let you figure the rest out yourself.

We would like to shift our structure to a more flexible model of management to accommodate for unforeseen market fluctuations.

So I am fired?

As I said we want to reschedule you indefinitely as our potential support asset. This pool is very prestigious and privileged position to be in.

So will I get paid?

As much as we would like to, truly, It is legally impossible for us to provide you with any funds outside of a legally binding contract which needs to be terminated in order to shift to a better state of financial buoyancy.

My boss and HR lady were very solemn when I was laid off from my last job RIGHT BEFORE COVID started. I was BEAMING. HR lady said I was the most unconventional layoff she’s ever done. I thanked her and shook her hand. It was the best thing that happened to me in a long time.

HR personnel are such creeps. It really does attract a certain type.

Going to HR to get fired, yet another meeting that could've been an email.

I don't... need to see that again. It doesn't matter how good you were. When restructuring happens you lose regardless.

I work in HR and can tell you this is true

People Team. It's called People Team now.

Go on, fire me, it won‘t unjizz the bathroom stalls.

I'm going through it right now. Got a good review, but was demoted, but they didn't expect me to actually stay, so they are forcing me to quit

Resource. It's in the name. Dehumanization.

You'd be shocked the depravity people will sink to once others are no longer human in their eyes.

Empathy is not weakness, do not let our current economic system fool you. Nothing lasts forever.

Is this an actress, or am I missing a reference?

How are youuuu?

Oh sure, but if you look a little beyond the surface you'd see people who also just want to keep their jobs, just like you.

It's easy to vilify those you don't like, it's hard to really look at them and see that they aren't that different from us

Human capital management is pleased to announce there was an error on your hiring contract so you will be getting a 3% paycut

Felt good the day I told HR they didnt need to invest any more resources to "help" me. I was done and the boss clearly didnt care about having me around so I told them to fire me.

Up in the air was ahead of its time

If past.lives are real then every hr employee across the globe had a past life as some middle manag3mentnpaper.pusher making the Holocaust possible.

If you work in hr there's about a 99℅ you are irredeemably evil.

Would you prefer them be weeping? No really I wonder which people like getting bad news from more, happy or sad people.

Fire me? Fire deez nuts in your mouth HAHAHAAAAAAA gottem

Sub that cutie for a fatass overcheerful teddybear lookin dude and i been there

I'm triggered