I feel like these alignment jokes are by definition a stretch. There's always a couple good ones, some OK ones, and some terrible ones. The terrible ones ruin the whole thing for me. It would be better to have a reduced set or find another way to present the good ones I think.
I've recently learned to use the packets to apply to the fry just before I put it in my mouth. Makes it so there is always the same amount applied to the fry. Pretty nice actually
If I'm riding in a car, I'll tear open the ketchup packet, and dip a fry in it. Other times, I might squeeze the ketchup out onto each fry as I eat them-- only when using those refillable bottles with the narrow nozzle.
Condiments are not to touch the fries until the chosen time. I would rather have ketchup in my hand than on top. Whether ketchup or mayo, it should be on the side. I can always dip a fry. I can't Un-dip a fry.
Imagine you ordered delivery and the cook decided you wanted the ketchup how they like it, and 45 minutes after they came out of the fryer, a large man named Shannon riled up your dogs at 10pm, handed you a soggy box of luke warm, limp, sagging, already dressed potato sticks.