how to break an addiction?
how to break an addiction?
hey i’m not sure the title is accurate but i couldn’t think of anything better
basically i’ve been struggling with skin picking for my entire life
it started small
picking some overhangs and scans around my nails at 6
nothing too serious
as years went by it evolved into pretty severe skin picking, where i wasn’t able to go a day without making a lesion
and recently (like in the past year) the habit developed into full blown dermatilomania
i keep on picking to the point where my lesions can’t heal properly
the worst of it is i started picking skin on my heels to the point where i can’t walk properly anymore and when i do it causes me a lot of pain
it catches up to me in the evening when i’m bored
i’ve been advised to “occupy my hands with something” but what nobody seems to get is that it’s something i do absentmindedly i’m not sure what to do anymore
does anyone have similar experience or am i beyond help at this point ?
have a nice day
This is a medical condition, not just a bad habit. It is very treatable but will probably benefit from psychiatric treatment, not just counseling or friendly advice. As with OCD, this can include cognitive behavioral therapy as well as medication.
hi, thanks for reply that’s what i was afraid of
to be honest i started medical treatment with antidepressants around 3 years ago, 2.5 of which i spent speedrunning the entire pharmacy lmao in June this year i changed doctors and finally got on track (with venlafaxine and mirtazapine)
on top of that i started therapy in September i’ll try to bring up the skin picking again
i talked about this issue with my therapist earlier but despite my efforts i always end up relapsing so yeah thank you for thorough reply have a nice day
Also if you haven't heard the medical term for this yet, it's called dermatillomania, if it helps you to put a name to it.
Skin picking can show up from other conditions such as OCD mentioned above, anxiety, and also ADHD. Try again to raise the issue with your therapist. If they are dismissive, find a new therapist. Sometimes it takes trying on a few therapists to find one who clicks with you and can be helpful.
@aslafoo@lemmy.zip, don't skip on this -- this is the answer! I had a very bad experience last year that ended up causing me to develop OCD and it was mind-boggling how I couldn't stop myself from giving into it, I've never experienced anything like it.
Finally brought it to my doctor, got prescribed medication that ultimately fixed the problem. Also was told to look into cognitive behavioral therapy, which I did, and found it extremely helpful as well (though I'm doing so well that I don't want to risk coming off the meds just because the cognitive behavioral therapy practices were helpful). My doctor also gave me a referral to both a psychiatrist (in case I had side effects from the medication that lasted beyond the adjustment period and needed to explore other options, which I didn't) and a psychologist (to be guided through cognitive behavioral therapy professionally, which I didn't end up doing because my insurance no longer had a contract with them and by the time the American healthcare system re-referred me to another office I had no more symptoms). Basically my primary care physician gave me everything I needed to get my life back.
100% it was worth bringing to my doctor and I recommend doing the same. Don't wait on it. Consider getting some cheap fidget toys to fill your hands in the days leading up to your scheduled appointment but schedule it for as soon as possible.
We have a friend who does this. To the point of bleeding. It is a recognised medical compulsive disorder condition (a desire for perfect skin so you want to remove the imperfections which makes it worse and so on)
Please do see a doctor. They won’t think badly of you and can help.
i used to pick at the skin on my face as well, it wasn’t much of a body image issue thing in my case but still it was way more convenient and entertaining then focusing on boring class for example thank you for responding and my heart goes out for your friend i hope they’ll find their peace and feel better thank you again and have a lovely day
Picking skin is a symptom of something much deeper (and possibly darker).
The fact that you want to get rid of it is great but as someone mentioned you need help.
I would suggest reading "The body keeps the score" it may give a glimpse of the issue... But you need a professional
Good luck dear internet stranger and remember that you are lovable and loved
thank you, i really needed to hear that i’m aware my “habit” probably stems from my anxiety, but it’s really hard to simply not be anxious all the time yknow? thank you for taking your time to respond have a lovely day
Just to let you know, picking skin is not inherently a symptom of some deep hidden trauma. Sometimes brains do things a little randomly without there being deep psychological reasons behind it all, and that's fine, if that's the case.
Talk to your therapist about it, but don't think you need to go hunting down some secret trauma, if you don't feel traumatized or don't remember experiencing trauma. Because sometimes the answer is just "brains do be like that though"
Gloves/mittens barrier.
Even thin cotton gloves will stop you from being able to use your nails to pick.
(But the real answer is speaking to a psychologist, and working through their best practice that has worked with countless others : )
I feel you... For me, it sometimes help, when I notice that I'm doing it, to grab some knitting/stitching project or to grab a Rubix' Cube. But as others said, a specialist would be a good idea.
When I saw your post I remembered a meme I saw on Lemmy, it's kind of sad, but also makes me more aware of it...
i haven’t seen this meme, it’s pretty funny, thank you low-key made my day better
💛
You should try to talk to a doctor or psychiatrist about this habit, especially if it's beginning to bother you and affect your life in other ways.
As for things you can do right away, how about sticking bandaids on your sores, this will help them heal and it'll also keep you away from the area. And don't wait until it gets bad, but even put bandaids on prematurely if it'll get you to stop compulsively messing with your skin.
Another thing is to buy some basic skin care tools. As someone who has the habit of biting my nails, sometimes until they bleed or are painful, I know that biting them can lead to making them rough, which just leads to making me even more compelled to bite the rough bits. For me it can really become a cyclical problem that's also likely driven by anxiety and depression. But by clipping and filling my nails with proper tools I can quickly break the cycle, because my nails will start to generally feel better. So maybe you can do something similar with your skin by exfoliating and using lotion! It's worth a try!
Finally I want to say that cannabis has been good for my personal type/level of anxiety, though I hesitate to recommend it because when though I don't find it addictive I think it maybe isn't great to recommend to someone who is experiencing addictive or compulsive behavior.
In the end I think some combination of therapy, behavior pattern breaking and maybe drugs if necessary, might be able to help you get away from self-harming compulsive behavior. Good luck!
Dip your finger I'm pvc glue, letcit dry, peel it off. Repeat.
Or find an activity to distract. Don't sit on the sofa and watch TV (if that's where you pick), keep busy with other things.
I used to do this with my arms, I'd spend hours rubbing my fingers over my upper arms for pimples or anything similar. The excessive touching would inevitably cause more pimples, more squeezing and picking, more skin damage and scarring.
I stopped eventually in my late 20's but it takes effort. Awareness is key. Try to be mindful when you do it. When you catch yourself, don't beat yourself up, just recognise that you were doing it, remind yourself that it is damaging, remind yourself that you want to stop, and then stop doing it. Then do it again when you start doing it again.
You won't succeed immediately and that is fine. This isn't about hating yourself for your own behaviours or inability to act differently. This is about taking the active steps to train yourself not to act the way you have. It could take 6 months or a year, doesn't matter as long as you try. It's a behavioural addiction like any other that takes awareness and willingness to change.
im an alcoholic. one day, after a long trip down a dark and broken road, i decided to stop.
i used to drink in the evening when i was bored. nowadays, after dinner, in the evening, i take long walks. they're typically 6 miles and last two hours.
you'll stop if you really want to. getting the help of a professional or support group helps lots of people. good luck
Reminds me of one video. I recall his friends made a prank. The dude woke up from drinking too much in a hospital room where the nurse said that the had been comatose for many years.
To be clear, this wasn't the case - it was just a prank....but I bet experiencing that would put some people to think.
Buy some cotton gloves - anytime you're in a situation where you know you might pick, wear them. This has worked very well for me (nail biter).
It's worthwhile to see if professional. Especially because this is a long-term issue.
You can try the variety of individual remedies people are giving you, but the psychological barrier is real. And you need to address it as a real issue.
If pain is a deterrent, you could put some hot capsaicin oil on the areas that you normally pick, and then picking will be painful. Especially when you break the skin it'll burn. That might be a version therapy of a sort. But definitely seek a professional
So sorry, dear one. I have had many physical ticks, habits, addictions. Only one has been terribly damaging. I haven't been able to stop that one, but I have been able to stop some. My technique has been replacing a harmful one with one less harmful. I'm not sure I have specific advice other than to talk to a psychiatrist. In the most stressful time of my life, I managed to stop chewing my nails by taking anti anxiety meds. When life evened out, I didn't need them anymore (now I am meticulous about nail clipping and filing). I stopped picking at my feet when I got a foot rasp. Using it after baths with just my feet in the tub it felt like I got what I needed without hurting myself. Keep working, but professional help is best.
thank you for taking your time to respond i’ve never considered a foot rasp before but maybe i should really give it a try thank you again have a nice day
In addition to what others have said already (seriously, see a doctor), it can also help to redirect the urge. If your brain currently demands something to be picked, it doesn't have to be your skin - plucking on loose threads or fabric fuzz in an old towel until the surface feels smooth again, peeling labels off glass bottles until there is no paper left, anything with "tiny imperfections" that you can remove with a bit of fumbling can help to easen the urge without you damaging yourself in the process.
This is not "the solution" tho - it is only an additional little help to medication and therapy.
Recognize your behavioral triggers. Could be anxiety, stress, etc. Try to actively recognize how you're feeling before you engage in an addictive behavior, and then either do a substitute activity or find ways to (calmly) move your thoughts or feelings to a different place. The key concept is to divert your thinking that produces the addictive behavior.
Just my two cents, not a doctor but have broken an addiction or two.
thank you for response i’ll try my best to be more “conscious” of my habits hopefully i’ll get myself together and make it
congrats on breaking your addictions! maybe it’s not my place to say it but hell you should be proud of yourself cause this shits hard congrats again and have a great day :)
I used to bite my nails. All the way down to the quick. Did that for 20 something years. Finally wanted to stop. I did two things. 1. I became very conscience of when I felt like biting them. 2. I painted them which created a disincentive. After about a month or so, I had no desire to bite.
Maybe get some eczema cream or moisturizer to put on those spots you want to pick at? When you catch yourself doing it, substitute another activity? IDK.
I love
wastingspending lots of time on the computer.I'm friends with Beeminder.
I started at one minute less per day. At the moment I get one day in the countdown when I'm off the machine for 165 minutes. I raise the value when I feel it - slowly and steadily.
You can always try hypnosis therapy
This is bad advice.
Why? Have you ever experienced hypnosis therapy? Do you know what hypnosis can do?
Remember the stage hypnosis that you see on TV or on stage is for the benefit of entertainment. Propper hypnosis therapy is for the benefit of the client. I am a hypnosis practitioner and have helped people break habits such as smoking, drinking, etc. Even helped people with anxiety.
There are all sorts of 12 Step programs out there
https://www.12steps.nz/12-step-programs/self-mutilators-anonymous/
It may sound stupid, but stop doing it. And then don't start doing it again.
Fuck off
I know, the truth hurts.
You break an addiction the same way you do literally anything else. Purpose in life, work ethic, and dedication to pursue your goals.
Wow thanks I'm cured. Where do you recommend buying bootstraps?
Feels like a pretty weak argument to compare my statement "give your life purpose" to the larger socioeconomic issue of lack of upward mobility of class. I didn't tell anybody how to get rich quick, I told them how to rationalize an end to self harm.
This is some of the most hand waving vaguery I've ever read. You may as well have said that you break addiction by 'being rad '.
I think I did kind of okay for an explanation on such a complex subject in only 23 words. I guarantee you that a person without all three of those things won't break an addiction, but also yeah it can't be any better defined because all three of them are subjective to the person in question. A good work ethic for me is not the same as it is to you, a purpose in life can be anything, and pursuing the goal can have wildly different meaning as well.