So you might have been wondering, "hey where has corgi been lately?" Well, I'll tell ya

Tldr; recovery from an opioid relapse, quit cold turkey, still having some PAWS (heh...but no, post acute withdrawl syndromes)

Been thinking whether or not to share here, but hell, i know yall wouldn't think any less of me. So, here we go.

There isn't really a whole lot to tell. Basically, if you're familiar with kratom, the leaf contains a chemical called 7OH. It's being sold as a "stronger kratom." Nuh uh, no way.

I was hooked on tianeptine about 5 or 6 years ago, to the point where i had to shovel grams of white powder down my throat every 2 hours to keep from withdrawing. Couldn't make it through a full night. Eventually quit cold turkey because i was getting married soon (didn't work out, while different story), and symptoms lasted me i think 2 or 3 weeks, it was pure hell.

Well, not too long ago 7OH was presented to me as a kratom thing, so I bought some. As soon as I tried it, I knew what it was doing to my brain. Went online and yep, some people say it's morphine times ten.

Tapered down, and then jumped off completely last week on Wednesday night. Compared to tianeptine, quitting was a walk in the park. Still totally miserable, dont get me wrong, but i was barely shaking. Now, the worst of it is just some lingering background anxiety, and the insomnia. I'm hoping only 1 or 2 more days to level out. I was able fall asleep for a quick nap today in about 25 minutes, so thats a big w.

Ive still been browsing when I need to take my mind off stuff, and have left a few low effort comments, but yeah. Just wanted to tell yall what's been up with me and where I've been.

If anyone needs to vent about substances or talk about recovery, I'm always happy to. In fact, my band is putting out a new record this summer and part of the promo will probably be me doing an interview with a website called Clean And Sober Stoner.

So yeah. Thanks for reading this far, thank you for letting me feel safe for sharing without being judged, and love to all my hexbears

53 comments

I feel like at some point you get "Vanquisher of Drugs" added to your name as a title/style.

Thank god I never had a hankering for those substances (was always more of an amphetamine/white powder/uppers guy in my 20s and 30s which eventually fizzled out - now I just drink and that has subsided substantially into maybe 1-3 drinks Friday nights).
Well anyhow. Love ya, pal. Hope you feel better. If you ever need someone to talk to, you can always hit me up in the DMs.
- Same to you! Thanks for the support!

We don't know each other, comrades passing each other on the internet and all, but I always get a smile when I see a post of yours, if for no other reason than your username.
Please continue to take care of yourself, I hope things continue to get better for you.
Hugs are praxis, and I'm sending them your way.
- Aw shucks, you're the best

Comrade I'm so glad you're okay. If you need any support you know where we are. We're here for you in whatever capacity we can be. You got this take care of yourself
- Thanks buddy

Love ya conrad. Im having some issues w kratom my self as well. the last 5-6 grams daily are really giving me hell. I get to two 2 gram doses 12 hrs apart, and jfc.... yawning non stop, restless and achy legs all day and nite. Sleepy when i need to be awake, awaKe when i need to be sleepy.
Texas is going to outlaw it soon, and i havent bought kilos of kratom in quite a while because im a fucking addict; if i have it ill find the best reason ever to do it. So i buy retail, small, costly quantities instead. I am going to kick before it gets outlawed because i can find actual opiates all week long and i dont need to go back to opiates because i can no longer get kratom.
I worked 14 hours today. My day started w a jolt because my apprentice didnt cap the thing i told him to make sure he capped because one thing ive learned is that if people see a valve or a wheel or a switch, labelled or no, someones gonna fuck with it, and guess what happened? Homeowner's 7 year old saw a ball valve, and grabbed the handle and turned it and walked away without a second thought... and then proceeded to flood a portion of a split level home that was being remodeled. Im the lead plumber/field service supervisor ao it is my job to eat shit sandwiches when this shit happens. Days like today i really want an extra gram or two of kratom, but thats the addict speaking up, and i have to try extra hard to get him to shut the fuck up.
Im gonna eat an extra edible, an extra tylenol, and go lay on the couch and shitpost til im a sleepyboi, instead. Im not fond of euphemisms from AA, but one day at a time is how it is today. Maybe tomorrow will be better.
- Rock on, glad you're....I don't wanna say "learning that about yourself," that doesn't feel right at all, but at least seriously thinkin about it. The restless legs are the fucking worst, holy shit, aren't they? I remember getting off the other shit I took years ago, I was up at 4AM just whacking my limbs against the wall to make the feeling of my bones wanting to peel up go away for a split second.
  If you wanna DM me, I can definitely point you to some helper stuff you can get, if you feel like tapering isn't for you. I've got a whole bigass list of things from over the years that people say help.

Glad to hear you are okay, got quite worried when I saw that content warning
- Thanks comrade! Definitely through the worst of it, and feel good and hopeful that I'll get good sleep tonight

Weird shit out there these days. Glad you were able to overcome it. Take care of yourself.
- Will do! Almost there!

big hug to you
- Thanks comrade!

Hope you're doing okay, I think a lot of people here have dealt with similar stuff, so we understand where you're coming from.
What's important is that your relapse isn't turning back into habitual use, proud of you!
- Thanks comrade. Tons of people in the same boat here on this site, no doubt about it. Dunno what more to say so ill end this sentence and hit post

Happy to hear you're doing better, and I hope you can get some solid sleep soon!
- Sleep did not come sadly, it's now 730am and I've been awake. Oh well.
  
  Stay strong <3 I believe in you

That's so fucked up that they made MJ into ~~psuedo-opiods~~ actual fucking opiods. I'm glad you caught on when you did!
- Full on mu-receptor antagonist. It's fuckin crazy but not surprising. "New feel good chemical? let's make pills and profit!"

Congrats on your sobriety. Been there with the tianeptine, horrible withdrawal. I had such terrible depression afterward.
I checked my kratom supplier the other day because I'm getting low and saw they sell 7oh pills. I could tell it was something heavy by the way they are marketing it. Was kinda bummed because I'm afraid it'll get them shut down.
I'm still trying to get off regular kratom but it's been hard because I'm working crazy hours after 15 years on disability. I thought about trying to get a lose dose of Suboxone for maintenance, but kratom is actually cheaper and I don't have to go to a doctor monthly to get it.
- If you feel like suboxone would help, I'd say go for it! Have you tried tapering? Ive always found regular old kratom really easy to deal with. If you wanna dm me, happy to chat further! I also have a ton of supplements and shit i can list off that people say help. Or if you dont want suboxone, apparently there's like a standard thing on QuickMD that they'll give to folks like us, and it works really well to help WDs
  
  The only reason I've considered Suboxone is the simplicity of taking something once a day. I take my kratom spread out into 5 doses, which works well for me, but it's a hassle to find ways to take it when I'm busy with work.
  I think I'm just going to taper down slowly once I feel like I am in a better place. I've done it before without serious symptoms, but it took forever to get my sleep right. I'm already not sleeping enough and working 12 hours a day, every day.
  I don't have cravings and I just take it at scheduled times like any other maintenance med. I don't like feeling beholden to meds in general, but I think it's smart to not mess with it right now. I'm pretty stressed and don't want to relapse into something worse.

I don't know anything about drugs, I'm just happy that you managed to get better.
- Getting there! Thanks comrade!

Glad you made it out of that comrade! I know someone who got suuuuper addicted to Kratom, and he perhaps struggled with psychosis before then, but it became a full blown issue for him after he started using, so, scary stuff. Grateful you made it through without that!

Hugs you so so tightly!
- Thanks comrade!

Ah, that blows. Hope it goes smoothly.
- Through the worst of it, just need the insomnia to go away! Thanks!

shovel grams of white powder down my throat every 2 hours
And 7oh has no better legs

You are almost there!
Keep at it.
I thought about getting Kratom in the past because of a friend who kept telling me about how much it made him productive but only hear bad things from people who have been on it for a while.
- If you get REGULAR, PLAIN OLD KRATOM you can probably use it for a few weeks and feel pretty ok when you stop. I've never had any problems with the plain old plant, but this new shit is a whole different level.
  But, that's just me, and I'd never recommend taking something that makes you feel good for a really long time unless your doc tells you to. But also I am cursed with an addict's brain, so the fuck do i know
  
  I didn't know they were different types but that was long ago. I have been an addict from time to time so I know what you mean but something about it magically changed 2 years ago for me.