1d ago

Does this happen to anyone

This might look stupid and completely insignificant compared to other people posting here, but this community looks the most appropriate to ask, so here is the situation : sometimes when I wake up (and only then), i have huge, existential fear (panic) that I will die. It lasts for a dozen of seconds, it's the only thing i can think about. The fear is profound, and infinitely large, there is nothing i can do to stop it myself.

Then, all becomes normal. The fear disappears and i am back to being a functioning individual.

The fact that it happens regularly, with a strict pattern (only at wakeup), tells me it is some chemical sude effect of sleeping (?)

Just for the record, i am aware this is nothing to worry about, i am not trying to get attention lol. i just wanted to know if anyone experiences the same

6 comments

you might need to work on making peace with your mortality. it’s a bummer and a reallllll tough one
Another thing to consider is the idea of setting events in your life. We all generally understand the cause and effect relationship of triggers (though sometimes they can be tricky to identify). A setting event, or distant antecedent/trigger, is similar in that there is a cause and effect relationship but it is not always obvious to see the relationship because they can be spread out. As an example: you are in a long term relationship and get dumped. This is now a setting event. For the next few weeks (or maybe longer) your behavior is modified as a result. It is not a direct “trigger” in the traditional cause and effect understanding. It is an albatross around your neck that increases the likelihood of you being depressed, irritable, anxious, etc.
Consider this effect and then we can analyze: is there something like this present in your life at the moment? Existential dread is a common one for a lot of people I work with right now given the state of well, everything, and it increases things like this for some people. Addressing the setting event here is challenging because we are potentially right back at the same conundrum. Making peace with climate change, potential government being overtaken by right wing nuts, trans erasure, etc is up there with making peace with mortality in terms of difficulty. Unplugging from news and social media can help although that may just feel like escapism and denial (to be fair it is, a little bit, but that’s not necessarily bad. Sometimes you need to prioritize your functioning)
Also never a bad idea to get a physical check up when new mental health symptoms crop up. You’re probably fine, I cannot stress this enough, but it’s especially a good idea if you haven’t had a check up in a while (eg over a year) or if the issues come with a lot of physical discomfort that is new. I again cannot stress enough that you are probably fine and this is precautionary
Of course it could be a million other things too. Consider talking to a therapist if you are able to do so. If you don’t have insurance or have shitty insurance open path collective is a directory of therapists that offer counseling for $30-$70 per session. https://openpathcollective.org/

It's not and it doesn't, mental stability is relative from one person to the other, your issue is and should be treated just as seriously as anyone else's.
With that out of the way, are you dreaming at all beforehand? Specifically, anything related to loss of control, or deep anxiety, or do you have something major going on in your life? You don't have to answer here, but those types of things can be enough to cause something like this, I think.
Not currently going through it, but I remember going through something similar during high-school. We got a new Chemistry teacher who really didn't like my "love the concepts, hate the math" approach and made it clear that she was out to "fix" that (ideally, by holding me back a year). I remember waking up every single day with a brief (2-3 seconds, with the rest being the trail-off) shock of sheer terror and anxiety. I didn't need to dream about it, I didn't need to have Chem classes that day, even happened during the weekend. And I remember it stopping at around the time when I gave up trying to understand what I was studying and accepted my fate.
This is why I asked, maybe you have something similar in your life, some sort of overarching worry. And it's not even necessary to be consciously aware of it, your subconscious has it all covered.
- Haha sorry for your chemistry experience, i regularly still dream about math and German exams, even if that was like a decade ago, and i scored well!
  But yeah might be that. First time i remember it happening, was during covid. Then it happens now and then without a clear "stress stimulus"
  
  Thanks! Managed to pull through by the skin of my teeth, luckily life forced a Charisma secondary build on me, so Speech was a dump stat. She wanted to see me suffer, so I gave her more than she could handle - got a passing average by the end, good enough for me!:))
  Yep, totally makes sense to have a Pandemic as a source. And, to be perfectly honest, there are plenty of valid reasons nowadays, even if one only pays attention in a passing manner.
  Another thing which came to me, might wanna talk to your GP/ a GP about potential thyroid implications. I used to have massive anxiety episodes and every medical doctor who checked me up (from dentist to cardiologist) told me to check my thyroid, as apparently hyperthyroidism may push the body into overdrive and it looks a lot like an anxiety attack. Mine were "just" anxiety attacks, but it still felt better to check that off the list, at least.

Could it be that your hormonal system is a bit too eager? Normally humans produce a higher level of Cortisol to wake up. Everyone does this. But high doses of Cortisol can also cause stress and anxiety, it is literally THE stress hormon. So my guess is that your adrenal gland is overactive in the morning (or even over the whole day).
- Might be? I don't think i am over stressed, but who knows what my body thinks lol.

6 comments