Helping others to do their best, especially when it's something they are truly passionate about.
Generating world peace.
The world would become a better place, and no one would be able to trace it back to me. I get to live in a warless world and still have my privacy.
I feel like you could game this… my superpower would be making a hit album in a day. I’ll just tell them it took several weeks. Replace album with day trading, writing a comedy set, movie, engineering designs, theoretical physics…
Game this is easy: I will be the best at commiting crimes without getting caught. In your face Moriarty
I was going to say "robbing banks" but I prefer the generality in your answer.
CRANKIN' MY HOG AROOOO!!!!!
I love that THE_PACK memes are leaking into Lemmy. WE MADE IT BOIS!!!
THAT'S CUZ THE PACK NEVER LEAVES A BROTHER BEHIND AROOOOOOOOOOOO!!!1!
computer programmer
Time to contribute great code to tons of open source projects, completely anonymously of course.
exactly
Theft.
Nobody's claimed stock investing yet, I'll take that one.
Making people laugh. They'll keep thinking there's someone funnier but they'll be wrong.
Can it be murder? I'd fix the world with violence if I could get away with it.
You've seen Death Note right?
If anything "Using violence to fix the world" would be the better thing to be good at since it protects you from the Monkey Paw to a certain extent. Exceptions:
- a "fixed" world being one devoid of humans
- a "fixed" world panning out in the opposite way you imagined (everyone is equally miserable instead of happy for example)
Everyone being equally miserable could be preferable to some people being happy, since it gives everybody equal reasons to work towards improving the situation... Except, of course, the monkey paw would ensure that wouldn't pan out
Embezzling money
Being a spy. Did I crack the code??
Not really. Spies need a handler. If no one can know then you can't tell anyone the secrets so you're a terrible spy.
Schrodingers spy.
Can't know I'm the best, can still think I'm a half decent spy yknow
Social engineering. Give everyone a sense of agency but make the world in my image.
Father?
😉
You sound like a lead anime character, and I mean that in the best way.
Being famous, in order to create a paradox.
It doesn't create a paradox. It just creates the same situation I've been thinking about for 30 years.
If I had any musical talant, I would be "Cheesy McSneezer" and my band would be "Cheesy McSneezer and the Cheesy McSneezer 7". It's a death metal jazz lounge band. They create all original music, but nobody knows who Cheesy McSneezer is. You hear him on all the albums, but every time you go to the concerts, the band tells you "Sorry guys, I know you came out for a great show, but Cheesy McSneezer couldn't be here tonight. So instead, please welcome our one night only temporary lead vocals......(Insert any random well known musician here)"
And every show, the reason why Cheesy couldn't make it changes, and is always completely absurd. And every album cover is like 100,000 people all coming together for a photo shoot. Somewhere in the photo, Cheesy McSneezer is always on the album art......but it's never aparent which one he is. And the photos are taken from so far away that you really don't have any up close visuals to cross reference the other photos with.
So every concert, is technically a famous musician doing cover songs for a guy that nobody knows who he is, but also everybody knows who he is.
If you haven't seen the movie Frank (2014) I'd recommend it
Based on a true story, unbelievably
Basically Buckethead.
Best masturbator
Permanently Deleted
Keeping secrets
Give me something like physics. I'm just damn curious about how clouds form, or how ants can't be the size of elephants. Back when I took physics courses I felt like I had a better fundamental understanding of the world.
Nowadays I'm busy going in another direction, but a cozy Wikipedia article is always fun to read from time to time.
Future’s market.
Picking lottery numbers
Making money.
Innovating new outside-the-box stuff, procedures, code, whatever. A robust public domain would happily be my legacy.
No small amount of art too.
Vigilante murder.
Being unnoticeable
Potatoes. I would be the best at potatoes.
Sleeping.
Making money
Writer. Publish under a pseudonym. ;)
making money. a win win really.
Inciting the revolution.
Alone time 😉
Life. Nobody would ever figure it out. They might think/say "he's got the best life", but who would think "he's the best at life".
Lying
This is the perfect answer. Self-reinforcing loop
The best at keeping secrets
Acting like I suck at things
Not giving a single F about anything.
I wish I could return to the state I was during pre birth. I have been given a small time frame of giving f's though until I will return to that state I desire to be in.
In about 50 years if nothing out of my control wipes me out I will return to being non existent.
Thinking about this makes me wonder, I havent given a single f since the big bang and now I am thrown on to a globe and a large handful of people passively forcing me to do. I have to be. I never had the option to not be. Lets see where this goes
I havent given a single f since the big bang
You think you're the first living creature to use those atoms that make up your current body? You're just the current tenant.
Giving no fucks is the natural state of the universe. One of the human superpowers is we give the most fucks, or we can give fucks about a lot of people, though even hundreds is stretching that limit.
It's one of the things we need to get over is that whether we as a species live or die, colonize the stars or go extinct in a century or less, not only will the universe not notice, but it won't care. It's up to us to care or not.
That said, we humans are cruel bastards, so yes, I appreciate the impetus to minimize the fucks you give.
You want to be the best at not giving a fuck? Pssshhhh!!!! Fat chance! I'm already the world leader in that....
takes a shit on your infant child
Eh....
Paying off people's mortgages in full.
Rescuing people from the Abrahamic religions.
I already am the best at something, but if I tell you, somebody would know...
Being internally happy and content.
sex
...but you couldn't show anyone :)
World's happiest hand, just discovered!
nobody could know
Nice try...
Picking lotto numbers.
Masturbating.
Shitting the stinkiest shit in the world..
