I've heard a hypothesis that patriarchy was a tool for redirecting hostility away from the colonizers. Men would get to be rulers over their family, so they'd risk losing that if they challenged the status quo; and women didn't really have the rights to do much, but if they could mount resistance it would be against men. Queer people challenge that whole setup, unless they're too busy trying to survive...
Or maybe it's actually just as simple as conformist societies are easier to control, idk.
This is a really interesting hypothesis. It makes so much sense, especially considering how many people I've encountered who still assume we conform to rigid gender roles -- e.g., "Who's the woman in the relationship," etc.