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My brain says the blue pill because money.
My heart says the red pill because I miss my soulmate and would give anything for a chance with her again.
I'm sorry you lost your soulmate.
The one thing is would you end up with your soul mate again and even if you did it wouldn't be the same relationship you had back then. I thought about this and have 3 kids and don't know if I would want to give up on my kids because there's no way I could say goodbye to my kids and never see them again.
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