Yeah I use php-fpm, I didn't know much about it the first time I installed it, I just needed it for HTTP 2.
For ssl I just install certbot and let it autorun LetsEncrypt, I haven't had any issues with any of my ssl certs, it's pretty nice.
The age old LAMP stack is pretty solid, except for me it's LAPP cuz I don't wanna use mysql.
I was using tailscale to transport files between devices quickly but I got an email about a vulnerability that leaked some info. I don't even use it for the vpn part so I just made a protal on a vps that I use now for file transfer. Tailscale was pretty fast at that though, and they were open about the exploit, so I think they're pretty cool.
Yeah apache is awesome. Lots of settings if u want, and every question I've ever asked and probably am yet to ask has already been answered on stack with multiple duplicates aha