„Inspired“ from https://lemmy.world/post/287146 and many related questions (also on reddit before).
Why don‘t people like opening Port 443 on their Homerouter? An open Port itself is not a vulnerability because nothing is listening on it, therefore there cannot be any connection established. When forwarding Port 443 From Router to e.g. The Homeservers LoadBalancer / Proxy, this Proxy is the final resolver anyways.
So why doing the more complex and more error prone Route via the VPS / Tailscale / CloudFlare?
I did that some years ago too, but just because i did not have an static IPv4 at home. But speeds were awful and i switched to Routerport + DynDNS and now everything is super performant.
i did that partially. I have a bit user subscribed to many communities. Unfortunately that is a fully manual task - currently i don’t have an automated way of doing this
More exciting are the people that host Their firewall/router like OPNSense/PFSense as a VM on their system! 😄
Somehow you are describing an „email“…
Problem with you approach is, that you have an easier maintenance, but your users need an additional tool. Especially when grandparents should use this, you should stick to what is there.
In theory you could host a matrix server and install some bridges like whatsapp, discord, etc. probably you would be able to create a matrix room and invite your granny via the whatsapp integration, your friends via discord, etc.
Disclaimer: I did not set up such solution - this just came to mind for your situation.
Since a move is tracked by the „Bürgeramt“ they will find you since this is a jurisdical topic.
About ten years ago, a friend got such letter about 700€ and they argued that the wifi was public (hotspot mode) and they did not know who did that.
Besides, those are the reasons why torrents are nearly dead in Germany as far as i know.
I am not too deep into the scene, but i could imagine that this is not neccessarily desired since every signed release could be linked to them from a forensic and juristic perspective. (in the case they are arrested)