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Guys Who Do Housework Get Less Sex
  • And who has better sex? And is more happy in general? I mean the egalitarian couples could also spend their time differently and thus have less sex? Maybe they spend their nights in the bar, in the cinema, playing Super Smash Bros. on the Switch or going to the amusement park... And boarding the beef bus every night is not that important to them?

    I'm not super impressed by just looking at the quantity. It's not what I'd have expected... But I think more research is needed.

  • Why don’t a lot of people use generics?
  • Where I live (Germany), it's fairly common to buy the generics. Not everyone does it, but enough people. They're available and oftentimes it's the exact same ingredients inside, just a different packaging and brand name on it. And a third of the price or so. I think it's more that people buy what they're used to. And if you just ask for Aspirin (which is a brand name here), the pharmacist is going to hand you that, and not the generic. So it's a bit more effort to add half a sentence to deliberately ask for the cheap one.

  • Men of Lemmy: What's you take on to marry an OF woman content creator? I'm not talking about hanging out or just sex. please only men answers.
  • I don't like these only men / only women questions. Why don't you judge an answer by if it's well reasoned? You shouldn't judge by if it's coming from a person with a certain set of private parts.

    I mean there are exceptions. »How does it feel to be a woman? I'm interested in the woman perspective.« is a valid question. But I think if asking for broad concepts like in this case, it should be avoided.

    Regarding the OF creator question... I'm not sure. I'd date first and see if it's a nice person before marrying. And live together for maybe half a year to assess if that's working out. Basically the same as with any other person with regular hobbies/jobs. If that's alright, everyone loves each other, enough boxes are ticked... I'd marry anyone. Disregarding if she's a plumber, OF creator or computer science professor.

  • Would you trust AI to scan your genitals for STIs?
  • I don't think the app in the picture is driven by AI. Seems like a catalogue of questions. Probably to assess some situation by some standard procedure. I'd trust that. Regarding the AI apps mentioned below: I wouldn't trust them at all. If my private parts start itching and I can't make sense of it, I'd go to the doctor. At least if it's serious. Or use Dr. Google if it's not too bad.

  • 3sat soll in Arte aufgehen – Auf Wiedersehen, Bildungssender!
  • Auf 3sat kommen aber ein paar nette Sendungen. Eigentlich kann man das am frühen Abend oft ganz gut nebenher einschalten. Können wir nicht lieber den ZDF Hauptsender einstellen? Da wüsste ich jetzt nix was mir fehlen würde.

  • Do we have any habital planets or moons that can maintain a human pressence without teraforming?
  • Sure, the universe is big. If you travel far enough, there is bound to be a planet with water and maybe breathable air. You might have to travel a few million years, though. And keep in mind that plants produced the oxygen here on earth by photosynthesis. So I'm not sure about how that'd happen on other planets. Maybe they can have oxygen for other physics reasons. Maybe they already have life on them. It's difficult to quantify the statistical chance for that. But the universe is a big place.

    If you question is if we can go there, the anwer is most certainly: No.

  • What's you take on single women having IVF children and the effect of those future fatherless adults into society?
  • Kids primarily need loving parents, friends and a nice evironment to grow up in. The exact gender of their parents and if they have 1, 2 or 3 doesn't matter that much. Everything in life has its unique challenges. But I think a kid with 2 traditional, yet unloving parents isn't better off than a kid with one or two mothers who love it. So it's giving your kid what they need, that is important. Not how you "produced" them, or if you're a man.

  • SMTP provider
  • You could use some containerized mail server like Mailcow. They're pretty alright to set up and should work fine for low volume. At least in my experience. Unless you don't want to deal with mail yourself, then you should maybe consider a paid service. But I don't have any experience with those.

  • Umstrittener Foto-Scan: Kommt jetzt die „Chatkontrolle light“?
  • Ja weiß nicht. Das Argument: Man könnte das ja Umgehen, also können wir gar nichts machen... ist m.E. ein Fehlschluss. Man kann auch 30% oder 80% von einem Problem angehen. Ist besser als nix. Und ich glaube so funktioniert eigentlich auch unser Gesetz. Es muss halt irgendwie im Verhältnis stehen. Man kann jetzt nicht rigoros Grundrechte einschränken um kaum was an anderer Stelle zu erreichen. Das ginge nur, wenn genug sinnvolles dahei herumkommt und gleichzeitig wenig oder keine negativen Nebeneffekte da sind. Dann würde ich sagen ist es okay auch eine halbe Lösung umzusetzen.

    Um echte und fiese Kriminelle zu fangen, braucht man aber sowieso mehr als so billige Tricks. Ich denke da kommt man nicht herum gut ausgebildete und fähige Fahnder zu bezahlen. Wobei sowas auch helfen kann, wenn die dumme Kunden haben und da irgendwo ein Tipp an die Polizei abgegeben wird, haben sie schonmal eine Spur und können sich von dort weiterarbeiten. Also so ganz sinnlos ist das auch nicht. Ist aber durchaus in meinen Augen sinnvoll sich dann nicht auf die einfach zu fangenden Kleinkriminellen zu konzentrieren, sondern da tatsächlich auch weiter zu ermitteln und die wirklich schlimmen Leute zu fangen...

  • Umstrittener Foto-Scan: Kommt jetzt die „Chatkontrolle light“?
  • Naja, das fände ich z.B. nicht okay. Wenn jetzt jede Datei, die jemand verschickt ge-tracked wird anhand ihres Hashes, wäre das ziemlich anlasslose Massenüberwachung. Die Hashes müssten schon irgendwie auf dem Gerät bleiben, nicht weitergeleitet und sofort verworfen werden, solange da nicht ein begründeter Verdacht ist, dass das auch tatsächlich eine Straftat ist.

  • Umstrittener Foto-Scan: Kommt jetzt die „Chatkontrolle light“?
  • Denke nicht. Das was ich die letzten Monate über Chatkontrolle gelesen habe, war alles immer ein billig verkleideter Versuch den Überwachungsstaat durchzudrücken. Definitiv zum Schaden der Menschen, die hier instrumentalisiert werden... Und dies ist der erste Vorschlag, den ich lese, der technisch tatsächlich etwas mit dem Problem zu tun hat. Bekannte Fingerabdrücke abzugleichen produziert ja jetzt nicht unendlich viele False-Positives. Und ich denke es besteht die Chance, das zu tun ohne Verschlüsselung aufzuweichen. Kommt etwas drauf an wie man es umsetzt. Einige Cloud-Anbieter machen dies auch schon. Also ich sehe hier unter Umständen den Schritt von verlogener Arbeit an Totalüberwachung, hin zu tatsächlich an dem (vorgegebenen) Problem zu arbeiten... Natürlich wissen wir alle, was wirklich hilft, mehr Geld, Fachwissen und Personal für die Polizei... Aber ich will nicht ausschließen, dass sowas Teil einer Strategie sein kann... Wie gesagt wenn man die Probleme ausräumt damit sinnlos die Bürger überwachen zu wollen.

    Also hiermit wäre erstmal Schluss, dass random irgendwelche Eltern, Kinder, ... vor Gericht landen, bloß weil sie sich selbst oder gegenseitig fotografieren. Und es Überschwemmt auch erstmal nicht die Polizei mit False-Positives und hindert sie an echter Arbeit.

  • Backup over home network - seeking advice
  • I think that's fine. Sometimes you learn stuff along the way. You can start with a half-baked solution and upgrade things or change them if it doesn't work out. As long as you're able and willing to invest the time to tinker, I don't think there is any harm in it. Usual advice applies, don't tinker with critical data and don't spend a lot of money and learn you can't use it, after the fact.

    Btw, some years ago I saw some people using udev rules or something to automatically trigger the backup process to start once a certain external harddisk got attached. That might be a solution if you want it to start on its own. I just can't find any recent tutorials on how to do it. But maybe your Gnome Backups has some mechanism to automate stuff.

  • Is there a working Spotify downloader that actually downloads from Spotify?

    Seems they recently changed something on Spotify and all the tools I've tried fail now. And DownOnSpot which seems promising has received a cease and desist letter and got taken down. What do you people use? I want something that actually fetches the audio from Spotify, not just rip it from YouTube. And it has to work as of now. Does the latest commit from DownOnSpot work? Back when I tested it a few weeks ago it failed due to some API changes. Are there other tools floating around?

    16
    Is Arli AI a legit cloud LLM inference service? Any user experience?

    I just found https://www.arliai.com/ who offer LLM inference for quite cheap. Without rate-limits and unlimited token generation. No-logging policy and they have an OpenAI compatible API.

    I've been using runpod.io previously but that's a whole different service as they sell compute and the customers have to build their own Docker images and run them in their cloud, by the hour/second.

    Should I switch to ArliAI? Does anyone have some experience with them? Or can recommend another nice inference service? I still refuse to pay $1.000 for a GPU and then also pay for electricity when I can use some $5/month cloud service and it'd last me 16 years before I reach the price of buying a decent GPU...

    Edit: Saw their $5 tier only includes models up to 12B parameters, so I'm not sure anymore. For larger models I'd need to pay close to what other inference services cost.

    4
    How to make the Threadiverse a nice place and effectively make it grow

    tl;dr: Be excellent to each other, do something constructive here?

    I'm not sure anymore where the Threadiverse is headed. (The Threadiverse being this threaded part of the Fediverse, i.e. Lemmy, MBin, PieFed, ...) In my time here, I've met a lot of nice people and had meaningful conversations and learned lots of things. At the same time, it's always been a mixed bag. We've always had quite some argumentative people here, trolls, ... I've seen people hate on and yell at each other, and do all kinds of destructive things. My issue with that is: Negative behavior is disproportionately affecting the atmosphere. And I'd argue we have nowhere enough nice behavior to even that out.

    I don't see Lemmy grow for quite some time now. Seems it's now leveling off at a bit less that 50k monthly active users. And I don't see how that'd change. I'm missing some clear vision/idea of where we want to be headed. And I miss an atmosphere that makes people want to join or stay here, of all of the places on the internet. The saying is: "If you don't go forwards you go backwards". I'm not sure if this applies... At least we're not shrinking anymore.

    And I'm always unsure if the tone and atmosphere here changes subtly and gradually. I've always disagreed with a few dynamics here. But lately it feels like we're on the decline, at least to me. I occasionally keep an eye on the votes on my comments. And seems I'm getting fewer of them. Sometimes I reply to a post and not a single person interacts. Even OP seems to have abandoned their post moments after writing it. And also for nuanced and longer replies, I regularly don't get more than one or two upvotes. I think that used to be a bit better at some point. And I see the same thing happening with other peoples' comments. So it's not just me writing low-quality comments. What does work is stating simple truths. I regularly get some incoming votes with those. But my vision of this place isn't spreading simple truths, but have proper and meaningful discussions, learn things and new perspectives or just mingle with people or talk. But judging by the votes I observe, that isn't appreciated by the community here.

    Another pet peeve of mine is the link aggregator aspect of Lemmy. I'd say at least 80% of Lemmy is about dumping some political (or tech) news articles. Lots of them don't generate any engagement. Lots of them are really low-effort. OP just dumps something somewhere, no body text added, no info about what's interesting about it. And people don't even read those articles. They just read the title and react (emotionally) to that. In the end probably neither OP nor the audience read the article and it's just littering the place. Burying and diminishing other, meaningful content. (With that said: There are also nice (news) discussions going on at the same time. And Lemmy is meant to be a link aggregator. It's just that my perception is: it's skewed towards low quality, low engagement and random noise.)

    A few people here also don't really like political debate. And there's no escape from it here on Lemmy since so much revolves around that. And nowadays politics is about strong opinions, emotions and emotional reactions. And often limited to that. The dynamics of Lemmy reinforce the negative aspect of that, because the time when you're most incentivized to reply or react is, when it triggers some strong emotion in you, for example you strongly disagree with a comment and that makes you want to counter it and write your own opinion underneath. If you agree, you don't feel a strong emotion and you don't reply. And the majority of users seems to also forget to upvote in that case, as I lined out earlier. And we also don't write nuanced answers, dissect complex things and examine it from all angles. That's just effort and it's not as rewarding for the brain to do that as it is pointing out that someone is wrong. So it just fosters an atmosphere of being argumentative.

    Prospect ----------

    I think we have several ways of steering the community:

    1. Technology: Features in the software, design choices that foster good behavior.
    2. Moderation: Give toxic people the boot, or delete content that drags down the place. Following: What remains is nice people and not adverse content.
    3. The community

    I'd say 1 and 2 go without saying. (Not that everything is perfect with those...) But it really boils down to 3: The community. This is a fairly participatory place. We are the ones shaping the tone and atmosphere. And it's our place. It's kind of our obligation to care for it if we want to see it go somewhere. Isn't it?

    So what's your vision of this place? Do you have some idea on where you'd like it to go? Practical ideas on how to achieve it? Do you even agree with my perception of the dynamics here, and the implications and conclusions I came up with?

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    InitialsDiceBearhttps://github.com/dicebear/dicebearhttps://creativecommons.org/publicdomain/zero/1.0/„Initials” (https://github.com/dicebear/dicebear) by „DiceBear”, licensed under „CC0 1.0” (https://creativecommons.org/publicdomain/zero/1.0/)HE
    hendrik @palaver.p3x.de

    A software developer and Linux nerd, living in Germany. I'm usually a chill dude but my online persona doesn't always reflect my true personality. Take what I say with a grain of salt, I usually try to be nice and give good advice, though.

    I'm into Free Software, selfhosting, microcontrollers and electronics, freedom, privacy and the usual stuff. And a few select other random things, too.

    Posts 3
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