WrittenInRed (She/They) @ WrittenInRed @piefed.blahaj.zone

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1 mo. ago

Yeah, honestly that was the thought that finally pushed me over the edge into accepting I was a trans girl instead of nonbinary or genderfluid or something. Like, I wanted so badly to be a girl at that point that my fear when starting HRT wasn't "what if I'm making a mistake', it was "what if I don't get to be a girl", which was so obviously trans that it was enough even for me lol.

A lot of mine are the same as ones that were listed, so here are the most stupidly obvious ones I somehow missed (or ignored) for like a decade.

1. I hoped my future partner would be bisexual "just in case"
2. Always being weirdly interested in watching trans youtubers and learning about HRT "as an ally"
3. And also weirdly envious of lesbian relationships, yet finding it hard to imagine myself in a relationship as a guy
4. Whenever I'd see a transition timeline, my immediate thought for transmasc ones was "good for them!", but for transfem ones it was "dang, that's goals" followed by "wait I'm cis, where did that come from"
5. I "knew" I wasn't trans, but kinda wished I could be
6. Just before finally fully admitting I was trans I started HRT so I'd "know for sure", and was worried that after starting I would realize I wasn't trans and not be able to keep transitioning lol