Poogona [he/him] @ Poogona @hexbear.net

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4 yr. ago

Honestly I think it might be why expression is something people (or at least I) seem to need. Bundling up the way I feel into a little "scene" to be distributed to others means that I have turned my grim ass emotions into something more solid that I can maybe pick apart and recontextualize. The cloud of death becomes something I can point to and moan about, maybe even joke about, instead of being my reality that I am stuck with.

edit: What plants are you growing?

The grief hurts but I think the part that has me particularly fucked up is the constant presence of death in my home now. Two pretty old parents and the remnants of many absent pets means it feels like everywhere I look I am reminded of mortality, and that's without mentioning the awareness of genocide in the wider backdrop.

I gotta get started back up writing something bigger than little practice exercises soon I think, it's the only method I know for processing this type of mental sewage

Man I lost like 3 pets this year and I'm feeling lonely as fuck and I can't really complain to my friends about it because they are dealing with much bigger problems right now, this sucks

Yeah yeah, your marriage is struggling, okay yeah you are making a lot of extra suicide jokes lately, yes yes I am happy you're recovering from your gender reassignment surgery

I happen to miss my dog and I reserve the right to be sad today

I kinda want to defend cumtown but also I don't think cumtown wants to be defended so I won't

At least I remember Nick Mullen making jokes about IDF soldiers bravely requesting APCs to clear out orphanages back in like 2017

Who doesn't love a bit of class betrayal?

I often think of Quixote and Sancho being an example of two people becoming "proletarians" (for lack of a better term) from opposite directions. Quixote's madness makes him become more of a genuine person who takes part in the world around him for a change while Sancho's exposure to such madness carves away at his more selfish lumpen tendencies as he realizes how the madness of his companion reflects upon him in the eyes of others. See also: Julian and Ricky from trailer park boys

I feel like I have seen this done but still miss the point, you know? Like there's the classic duo of sheltered princess and gritty merc, but in my experience it usually it winds up being about the sheltered person proving they are actually very "with it" in their own way and the gritty guy learning that royals are actually cool and fine.

To really capture the literary significance of a Quixotic figure, I think they must be in many ways pitiable and ridiculous to the point of frustration, with the pragmatist coming off as a bit of a user since Sancho at first is planning to just let this rich weirdo self-destruct as long as he gets paid along the way. This could still be done with the sort of beautified anime style, but in a sense I almost feel like it's a dynamic that works best with people who are maybe a little bit uglier.

I don't think it's a shortcut to being compelling but it breaks the mold of the usual "opposites who learn to like each other" buddy dynamic.

(Also don't let me deflate any ideas of yours I'm just discovering with these posts how much I apparently care about a book from the 16th century)

Any characters with the duo dynamic of Don Quixote/Sancho Panza is top tier imo

Privileged fancylad whose delusional mode of existence is born from his alienated life but paradoxically is also what allows him to connect with people in a way that is free of judgement, alongside a devoted pragmatist born of poverty who discovers the vocabulary for a kind of imaginative happiness through being unable to deny his instinct to care for the ridiculous person he is forced by circumstance to travel with

It is based it IS based and the people who do it have extremely correct opinions and are attractive

I talked with a researcher who bluntly called whiptails "a bunch of lesbos" and he wasn't even being funny, they still sorta kinda have sex to stimulate egg production.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8556411/

That study has a great diagram:

Observe the science man presiding over the lizards and their inscrutable hormones

Skeletons = infrastructure of the body

Skeleton warriors are just armed proletarians

These losers want to turn one of our greatest evolutionary gifts, our ability to recreationally nut, into a problem

Fuck that, I'm not going back to breeding seasons or heat cycles.

Don't be melodramatic, it is perfectly possible to both contribute to society and produce a 4 hour dissertation on the subject of The Dark Side of Stardew Valley Lore

I do agree though if the point is that these people are clearly willing to do things but the only path that seems available is pop culture analysis, it's just that tbh it's still a pretty small number of people producing these video essays compared to the sheer number of people in a society.

It's a good article that showcases the way AAA games are basically hollow. They wear a lot of art, incredibly elaborate, expensive, art, but none of it comes together to make the experience it promises. Everything is built in separate pieces and stuck together later, and its boring gameplay that shows no interest in being art of its own is the glue. I remember Yahtzee did a video about the first Destiny that made this same point, about how the environmental art in a few areas was fascinating and clearly full of effort, but the gameplay was a slog that lacked the same ambition.

What the fuck this is MY trivia to bring into convos this is THEFT

(Ants also do complex geometry by instinct and they even triangulate positions with the sun as reference, they are amazing)

The entire album Symbol by Susumu Yokota might hit the right nerve, though it's heavier on the dreamlike side and doesn't have lyrics. I use it for driving, writing, anything that needs a kind of hypnotized but functional state of mind.

Just want to throw in that if there's any available way for you to handle insect infestations without bug bombing or fumigation you should try those first. Those kill everything in the house, yes, but it wipes out all the predators of the pest insects you hate. Those predators take much longer to replenish than the pest insects, and so your next wave of pests will be much bigger without those biological controls.

Doing this kind of fantasy for your political representatives is of course cringe but I am much more bothered by the way this is written

Hard to figure out why exactly, maybe it's because it's structured like a TV scene with the narrative voice just being inane commentary? Like what does that "this is going to fun" at the end add? It would be better to just end it at the smile.

See I remember being interested in the stuff from a much more indistinct lens, stuff like our instinctive fear and disgust towards certain stimuli (seeing a snake in the grass, trypophobia, why certain bugs freak people out more than others) but most of the people I met who were into evopsych just wanted to study IQ, I assume because it would let them categorize people into tiers of worth. I hated it both because it was a hiding spot for racism and because it was ruining what could be a pretty interesting field looking at mankind's part in the evolutionary narrative of mammals.

Even the Mahabharata is like a thorough endorsement of Patriarchal power structures but it's what makes mythology and its fuzzy ironic (ambivalent?) relationship with its historical context so interesting

Biology disciplines that focus on evolutionary study really do have rightoid enclaves, it feels very much like a microcosm of the ideological side of being right wing since studying evolution is ultimately systemic study and these people instead boil down the rich and fascinating narrative of evolutionary history into a series of great man narratives except it's Great Gene Theory instead.