My local police force routinely touts that nearly 40% of their officers are gay. Its the women. Almost all of their female officers are lesbian. It's kind of progressive but also kind of feels like cheating

Doctor: I have consulted decades of scientific literature to diagnose your ailment and provide a treatment plan based on humanity's continually improving understanding of the biochemical workings of our bodies.

Chiropractor: I have consulted a book written by D. D. Palmer in 1895 who was a magnetic healer, anti-vaccine, and anti-medicine. He says you have ghosts in your bones and it's messing with your natural healing powers. I'm gonna crack your back now. Yes I'm a doctor. Well not a doctor doctor, but you know.

What do you do when you got an extra mozzarella stick on your plate?

PickitupPickitupPickituuuuuuuuup!

Just gonna squeeeeeze right past ya there.

Windows has WinGet now. It's probably already installed but if not, their install page says it can be installed from the Microsoft Store. It also has WSL for running Linux programs.

Using a browser to download a browser is for people who don't know how to use a package manager.

They're saying this user posts nothing but rage bait. What does this have to do with American conservative politics?

In case anyone wanted to know a bit more. He was the founder of the American Railway Union, one of America's first industrial unions. As leader, he organized a stike against the Pullman factory that resulted in its own factory workers, who were not ARU members, to strike. The strike was because factory workers had their wages reduced but their rents (which they paid to the company they worked for) were not. Engineers and conductors for the company continued to work, so Debs had the striking factory workers block railways. That caused the government to send in the army to break up the union and jail Debs along with other union and strike leaders.

While in jail, Debs read socialist political literature and founded several socialist political parties on his release. Debs gave many political speeches that upset the government, but one where he urged listeners to dodge the WWI military draft, because the proletariat shouldn't fight the battles of the rulling class, caused him to be jailed once again for sedition. It was this time in jail that he ran for office.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eugene_V._Debs

Gives a new meaning to losing on time.

Trump is a criminal.

Know what isn't satire? The NYPD actually has a station in Isreal. They have stations in more than a dozen foreign countries.

Falsifying business transactions is most definitely going to be a fine, but a convicted felon running for office might make people think twice.

Golden Gate crippled Red Lobster by selling off one of its most valuable assets, the real estate it owned, in what’s known as a sale-leaseback, for $1.5 billion. With that sale, Golden Gate nearly made back its $2.1 billion purchase of Red Lobster, while turning the chain into a permanent leaser, adding a massive additional cost in the form of rent that was orders of magnitude bigger than the cost of Endless Shrimp. When commercial leases started going up, Red Lobster was highly exposed, but by then Golden Gate had already sold off its shares to Thai Union, which inherited all the debts Golden Gate stacked on the company.

Buy the company for $2.1 billion, sell all of its property for $1.5 billion. Sell the company to someone else. That's the work of job creators right there.

The up to date one is the OP

Are you telling me Atticus Finch wasn't a bird lawyer?

Yup, this is every job. Your skills at performing a task are only a small part of success. The bigger part is being able to make friends with the right people.

Edison and Tesla come to mind. Edison wasn't the best when it came to electrical engineering but he was good at talking. Tesla was brilliant and is the father of modern electrical engineering but his best friend was a pigeon. During their lifetimes, Edison was much more successful than Tesla was.

Here, if you have a milkshake, and I have a milkshake, and I have a straw. There it is, it's a straw, you see? Watch it. Now my straw reaches across the room and starts to drink your milkshake. I... drink... your... milkshake. I drink it up!

I like the explanation that devious spirits cannot say this phrase and that's why it's used. Apparently it's also just a casual way of saying "I'm ready to talk" and was used by early telephone operators in Japan. It's most likely people just ended up copying the phrase from operators and aren't worried about being tricked by foxes.

I know google sucks now but it isn't hard to find facts online. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Government_Pension_Fund_of_Norway

This is all the quiet parts outloud.
Police don't need to follow the rules they enforce.
Police don't understand what makes something unsafe (cyclists aren't worried about running into your car, they're worried about having to enter the roadway to get around your car).
Police should be worshiped like heros.
Police believe "criminal" is a class of people.
Police think anyone who complains about police is a libtard soyboy who cares about people's feelings.