Does a single board computer counts as a phone? Then a Orange pi zero 3. (Not like theres anything else to do other than read/lurk online communities, code and the occasional cloud gaming nowadays, so eh.)
Have you tried embracing the inevitable stress of learning/doing new things and enjoying the improvements instead of not stressing yourself but being the same, boring, stagnate old self for years to come?
Eh... "gaslighting 101" -- swears randomly (against the victim/target), throws in a (non-random) praise to "raise the fire even more", refuses to elaborate.
Why do you hate yourself this much?
j/k. nicely done. I'd feel like a hacker if I could do this on my phone, but I'm too scared to brick it.