Exactly how I felt. Like there was a veil over my emotions that was lifted by HRT.

Haha I'm the total opposite. I made the mistake of going to karaoke with some friends (some of whom I wasn't out as trans with) and I had to chose between sounding like a dying vulture but continuing to pass, or singing okay but outing myself... I chose the dying vulture XD

I've never worn makeup in my life and I am stealth, and Im friends with other trans women who pass without makeup as well. HRT really does work, but honestly, passing is about way more than just HRT or lazer or makeup, or behaviors, or voice training. It's a skill and the only way to get better at it is to do it and do it for long periods of time. Trying your best to pass through all those methods above at all times for long periods of times WILL yield results, much more than just doing HRT and waiting.

Oh im out to all my freinds, I dont need the stress in my life of being stealth arround freinds. And like, all I'll say is, obviously you need to protect yourslef, but dont let fear be the primary motivator in your life. Its not worth it.

It's not even November yet and we get out first snowstorm plus it's already pitch black for half the day... Ugh 😫 how do people NOT get seasonally depressed?

I've told men I'm trans after being intimate before and if anything that just makes them less likely to lose interest, tho I do admit I absolutely could have just gotten lucky and dodged a bunch of bullets, cuz yeah I know that some men will respond violently.

I really do get wanting to remain stealth. Getting to just live life as a "normal" person for the first time In your entire life is kinda indescribable, and I've definitely had periods of time where I wanted to do only that. There are trade offs tho, as I'm sure you know, and it's up to you to decide if the price is really worth it.

Dating apps as a stealth trans girl dating straight guys is dreadful. I've met the people I have through random life circumstance mostly, just being out in life doing things and meeting cool people. And like, I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, but I've told A LOT of men, many of whom I didn't know very well, that I am trans after they have shown interest, and while a significant portion of them dropped interest immediately or reacted with shock, I never felt like I was in danger. Especially if this is a guy who seems cool, who's a mutual friend, Is it really worth letting fear control your life this much? I don't know the answer, but I certainly don't live my life that way.

Idk, I've also dated quite a few cis/hey guys while stealthing (at first) and I've honestly been surprised by how the majority of men are kinda fine about it. Its definitely a problem with getting serious with cis het guys, but almost every guy who's been interested in me before I told them I was trans was still interested after, albeit with a lot of baggage.. lol

Maybe I have just been lucky, has that not been your experience?

yuh oh o.o

Follow the law

Okay my bad, I do like all of these lol

so true bestie

I feel like this image is my sleeper against activation phrase you know what I mean? (In game)

If you feel like you are pretending and generally bad when you present more femm, do you think will taking HRT change that? And if you dont think you want to present femm at all, what are you expectations for HRT? More specifically, how do you expect HRT to change your body and do you think it will change your self preception?

Why does the concept of wearing feminine clothes outside freak you out? Is it a concern for what others will think of you, or a genuine desire to not want to dress in that way. Also, when you say "I view myself as a guy who would prefer to be a girl" what do you mean by that? And what is your motivation behind potentially starting HRT?

I really recommend "living" a bit with a different gender presentation, in whatever form that feels good to you. I also am someone who over analyzes my own thoughts and gender, but doing things as simple as, trying on femm clothes I liked and just going for a walk and doing some errands, experimenting with a femm voice in online voice chats was all it took for me to instantly realize I never wanted to stop ever again. The only real way to know if you are going to want to live the rest of your life with a different gender presentation is to try it out. No matter how scary that prospect may seem, the alternative is much scarier, don't let fear stop you from being happy. <3 you got this

you win

The fact that you are even considering that you may be the only person here thinking about those things screams to me that you need to do one of two things, preferably both. One, read some queer theory, Whipping Girl by Julia Sernao is an amazing place to start, it's required reading for you, do it. Two, get some life experience as the gender you really are. You will learn so so much about yourself, about other people, and about gender by living it for yourself, the sooner you can stop questioning and start living the way that feels whole to you, the better. I know it's scary, I've been there, leaning into the fear and living your new life is the greatest possible thing you can do, so do it. I apologize that I came off as brash, I understand that it isn't diplomatic or particularly helpful to address your comment like that, but the specific type of brainworks you are posting about really rub me the wrong way.

This happens to me when, after a period of time exclusively using she/her to refer to me, they will start start they/themming me only AFTER I bring up that I'm trans... At least it shows me real quick that those people are fuck ups that I don't need to waste time on.

Riiiight. Cis women, specifically, have an intangible "energy", and of course before even approaching them, you know that they are in fact cis, you can tell , can't we all? This fact elevates them to such a degree that you can't bring yourself debase their (cis) "feminine energy" with your meager presence.

I mean this with all the love in the world. Grow the fuck up.