You're too late to get that job but here is another opportunity!
This is a part-time on-site volunteer role at my house. As a volunteer, you will be responsible for cooking, cleaning, chopping firewood, and providing other support to the residents. This may include serving drinks to visitors, restocking shelves, organizing inventory, and light house painting. Your role as a volunteer is crucial in ensuring that our household has a positive and seamless home experience.
Qualifications
Excellent customer service and interpersonal skills
Ability to work well in a team environment
Strong attention to detail and organizational skills
Ability to multitask and prioritize tasks effectively
Good communication skills
Previous experience with R and python programming is an asset
Availability to work weekends, nights, and holidays
Total subservience and ability to follow orders without question
Best I can do is promise not to smoke meth in front of the kids and guarantee that toilet paper will be used at least 60% of the time for any bathroom trips. Still hiring?