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BJP's real manifesto. (Partial Sarcasm)

cross-posted from: https://lemy.lol/post/24408074

  1. Keep rallying in support of rapists like Brij Bhushan, Kuldeep Singh Sengar and Prajwal Revanna.

  2. Abki baar 400 paar rapists in BJP.

  3. Keep garlanding rapists because we take sadistic pleasure in the sufferings of other communities.

  4. Instigate more riots like Delhi and Manipur and refuse to fix the conflicts.

  5. 95% of the taxpayers money will be invested in Gujarat. From bullet trains, diamond exchange, semiconductor plants, everything will go to Gujarat.

  6. Cow politics will continue in the North while promoting beef in South and Northeast.

  7. In cases of Rape of Dalit women by high caste men like hathras we will arrest the journalists and launch rallies in support of rapists.

  8. Get rid of the reservation for OBC and SC, ST and install manusmriti to put lower caste Hindus back in their place.

  9. Women will need written consent from parents to date someone as prescribed by uttarakhand UCC.

  10. Keep Lynching minorities in India, killing local demand for beef and kissing Khalifa @#$ in gulf exporting all the beef there for 25x price.

  11. Keep the youth unemployed to work as keyboard warriors and street saffron gangs.

  12. Kill public education. Make study of science and logic a crime under UAPA. Already the periodic table, evolution and dozens of other topics are removed from the syllabus. This way people will believe all nonsense.

  13. Too many political parties are cluttering it. Introduce one party system.

  14. An Electoral bond tax of 20% will be levied on all sales and income taxes.

  15. Supreme court will be replaced with a temple where Asharam bapu, Brij Bhushan Singh and Prajwal Revanna will handle all rape cases.

  16. Inflation will be increased to 20 percent so the government can print away your purchasing power and make a lot more money than tax collections.

  17. Corruption will be relabelled as Service tax.

  18. Inaugurate more hospitals and airports but 90% will only stay as boundary walls like AIIMS Darbhanga or AIIMS Madurai.

  19. Rape will be India's national sport.

  20. Death penalty for criticising government policy or any MP or MLA.

  21. The money in your Bank account will belong to Adani as rising NPAs causes the banks to go bankrupt.

  22. Learn lessons from Covishield and create a more potent vaccine for poverty that eliminates the poor.

  23. The government will take 15 lakh from everyone's bank account converting white money into black.

  24. Every youth will get an unpaid internship in Adani's factories.

  25. Increase import target from China from $100 billion to $1 trillion. Make in India will be reduced to get spare parts from China and assemble in India.

  26. Will unleash keyboard warriors to boycott China from Chinese phones.

  27. If a Brahmin rapes a woman from other community it will be called good sanskaar as happened in Bilkis Bano case.

  28. Hospitals will be replaced with Ayushman Arogya Mandir.

  29. Gaumutra and gobar will be the only approved medicine for Cancer and other major illnesses.

  30. Brij Bhushan Singh will get Padma Bhushan for saving India from the dangers of women wrestlers.

  31. More people will be pushed into poverty by ruining public education making people unemployable and ruining public healthcare so even having a splinter removed at a private hospital will get you into a lifetime of debt.

  32. Extremely poor who will be dependent on food rations from the government will be increased from 810 million to 1.2 billion. This will improve the food for vote campaign.

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