Tomorrow I need to get up early since I need to attend a funeral for a former colleague. I'll meet up in the morning with other former colleagues, two who have grown to be very close friends, to go to the graveyard together...
Thing is, shit's weighing down on me. This former colleague was just entering her retirement last year in June, we hoped she could finally enjoy some quiet time just for herself... But nope. She always had respiratory issues, but the last bout of pneumonia left her in an almost crippled state by my friends description. Despite her denying her failing health, she died of kidney failure. I was just a few weeks at the internship at Bad Liebenstein when my friend S. texted me the bad news in the evening... I immediately sank down into my bed in total shock. My classmate and roommate Tom immediately got up and asked if everything was alright. But nothing was alright. I got up, motioned him to grab his jacket and we went for a smoke/vape. I still remember how unreal this situation felt, my hands and legs shaking, my voice trembling. It's definitely awful...
The worst part: C. was just 63 when she died. She was a fan of whiskey and the last time we saw each other at my farewell party in the old workplace, I promised her that I'd visit her again and drink a good Scotch with her. Now this promise is lost... I deeply regret that this was the last time I've seen her and that we never drank whiskey together. Very unfortunate, since she was one of the most welcoming colleagues I ever had. Always made sure that I feel validated and accepted. I think this could serve as an important life lesson - don't postpone things for too long, since ultimately it will be too late to spend time with people who are important to you.
Sorry for venting, folks. It's just that I usually keep everything to myself and sometimes it just bursts out. Hope everyone of you has a nice weekend...
