It's so easy to self host these days. I remember when you'd have to fuck around with Apache configs and fuck around with app config files etc. Now you just run docker. It's so great these days!
docker-compose helped me wrap my head around docker. I can use run commands now, but prefer to either modify a compose file or create my own to spin things up.
What's the difference between a docker and just installing an app on rented server space?
Functionally? Not much. But people who selfhost typically want everything on computers they own. Whether it's for learning purposes, or to not have their stuff on "someone else's computer" selfhosting usually means you're running software on computers you own, almost always within your own house.
Does each dock (?) have its own server? (Apache or nginx or whatever?)
Each docker image usually has a web server built in. The philosophy of docker is that it contains everything needed to run the app. Even a small linux OS (LibELEC or Alpine are favorites for docker images). So while you're not managing the web server in a docker image each docker image will have its own web server if web access is needed
Does each dock host a whole site, or do you have a dock for your database and a dock for your web app?
Docker the program is what runs all the docker images on a computer. Each docker image is built as per the software's developer. Some docker images will have a web app and a database combined into a single image, while others will expect a separate database server running independent of the image (It won't care if the database server is a docker image or not; just that it has access)
Docker is basically a virtual machine image you write your software in. Then when you run the software you don’t need to worry about compatibility or having the right dependencies installed, it’s all included in the docker image.
Think of Docker as being Nintendo cartridges that you can take to any friends house, plug them in, and play. Servers can run more than one Docker container.
The approach greatly simplifies writing code and having it work on your server, reduces errors, and adds a layer of security.
I think you should just choose whatever software or project you want to selfhost, read how to do it, and learn by doing.
I'm a complete idiot but I learned how to self host from trying to set up a Jellyfin server on my Windows desktop. Now I host game servers, Matrix with bridges, Discord bots, and this Lemmy instance that I'm in. I (re)learned how to use Linux and fell in love with it too.
This is how I got a career in Software Engineering, literally had a strong motivation to build a clan website for my Counter-Strike 1.6 crew and I just ended up learning by maintaining self-hosted websites, forums, and voip. Kept doing it over and over by building other projects and then realized people pay for this skill...
I got started (with minimal knowledge and a love for tinkering) by installing proxmox on an old computer (i3 with 8gb of ram) and then using Proxmox Helper scripts https://tteck.github.io/Proxmox/. I run home assistant in a vm within proxomox and have a docker instance running in a container in proxmox. It's all been fairly easy so far, although I'm not sure I'd call it a one- or two- click solution. I got started from the home assitant community, and I'm new to the self hosted community, so I may do things a little differently from others around here.
purchase something like a small Synology NAS and learn how to set up the networking/firewall bits
buy/repurpose a used desktop/laptop, install something like yunohost/unraid
buy parts for your own server, put it together, use the same own server but install proxmox, setup VMs/containers
use the same own server but install debian, play around with docker/docker-compose/ansible
If you don't have the means to get new hardware, you can use hyper-v or virtualbox for free on Windows or virtualbox/virt-manager on Linux on existing hardware.
Simple project to start with: install pihole and configure it as your DNS adblocking filter at home
install iphole on a VM/PC/raspberry pi that is connected to your home LAN
configure your PC or router to use the pihole host as DNS server
test various websites you know that have ads before and after using pihole
While doing things like these, keep notes what you do by day, using those notes, put together your own howto manuals.
Do not be afraid to fail, sleep over it and try again, don't be afraid to ask specific questions here or on other forums, IRC.