This is literally me. I can't even write more than 3 sentences without saying "who the fuck do I think I am to even be writing!? This is not only terrible, but I'm some sort of pretentious douche that I think someone should read what I created!"
Comments don't count as writing to me apparently lol
Or when you spell a word and there's no red squiggly line to say it's spelled wrong but you swear that's not how it's supposed to look. Then add random letters to the end to test if the spellcheck is working and it confirms you spelled it right the first time.
Yesterday I was trying to write out ‘inconspicuous’ and my brain short circuited. Could not remember what word I was trying to spell, how to say it, I couldn’t conjure it on the white board in my head. It was like it was suddenly purged from my memory.
I literally always feel unmotivated when I read through first draft material. It sounds stupid in my head, sounds like I'm rambling, nothing makes sense, I'm a horrible writer.
So I just don't and I hate myself for it. I need to teach myself to just push through it and actually go through an editing process.