You forgot my favorite parable, The Cleansing of the Temple:
And when he had made a scourge of small cords, he drove them all out of the temple, and the sheep, and the oxen; and poured out the changers' money, and overthrew the tables; And said unto them that sold doves, Take these things hence; make not my Father's house a house of merchandise. John 2:15-16
Jesus whipping money lenders will always make me chuckle.
Poor and homeless? Dude was a carpenter. He wasn’t rich but my understanding is that he made sure his family were looked after before changing careers. He wandered, but he could have gone home at any time.
When I was a kid I got in trouble for telling people at church Jesus was "African-american" my dumb kid mind thought that was the only acceptable way to say "not white." I don't think I was ever able to explain what I meant.
Honestly, leftie Jesus is a bit of a whitewashing itself. If you read the Bible the guy is petty AF half the time, especially with people who aren't entertaining religious solicitors and keep throwing his gang of preaching cultists out of places. I'm cool with calling out the hypocrisy of Christian right-wingers, but let's not pretend Christianity doesn't have a ton of built-in garbage along those lines. I mean, understandably, it's the preachings of some random guy 2000 years ago, so does Plato, but still.
Roundheads (who later settled Massachusetts as Puritans) believed that Jesus would return to the center of the world (aka London, obs) speaking English to establish the New Jerusalem.
Only argument I have with this is that he was definitely christian, the dude strongly believed in himself, I mean you don't go around saying you're the son of God willy nilly
The historical Jesus was not a child refugee. He was from Nazareth, period. The stories of the family traveling to Bethlehem are not in the oldest gospel (Mark) and almost certainly got added in to explain why the messiah was not from Bethlehem when prophecy said he would be, the same home town as King David.
Here's the thing, though: Jesus is no more than a stolen symbol to these types. It's just like saying, "I am a good person," there is no validation, certification, or standards for it. Anyone can claim they are Christian, anyone can claim they follow Jesus, They just picked up a name tag off the street and wear it. That's it. It's really down to a simplified "I am good, they are bad." So using logic, reason, and even proof in the bible is pointless. There's zero consequences to claiming you're doing what you want, even despicable acts, "because it's the Christian thing to do." Look at the Crusades. The papacy. It's not a new thing. It's the same old bullshit.
Even pedophiles can quote scripture.
If the various churches cared ANYTHING about their tenants, they'd have a vetting process. They'd check on their flock's behavior. They'd work on making the world a better place through helping others. They'd kick out any member of their group who violated their rules. But most of them don't, or if they do, it's a social moray fueled by their own hatred and ignorance. They just want the numbers, they just want the POWER, and it's no more valid than a gang of thugs or the Mafia.
And I see memes like this, and it's preaching to the choir. We KNOW they don't follow anything jesus said, claim that they do, and in the end of the day they are the same hypocrites that wear red hats to make America "Great" again. It's not adding anything to the narrative but creating a snobbish divide. "Well, look how smart we are to point out the obvious using technicalities that do nothing but insult them. Ha ha, they so dumb." Mentally, these people are children. You see toddlers interact? There's all kinds of wisdom into human culture right there. Only toddlers can't hide it yet. There's hitting, crying, illogical bullshit. But we, as adults, teach them to behave and are supposed to set an example. But they learn the hypocrisy from us, too, whether we know it or not.
So, you know, memes like this also do the same thing to these people who think Jesus is a white dude that they can wear on a tee short while calling the homeless discussing illegals or whatever. They hate us because we look down on THEM. We have to treat these people like children, and not "dismissively like stupid kids," but like, "Hey, buddy. I see you're having trouble processing your hate and fear. Let's go over here and calm down for a second." Or something. Raise 'em right.
I'm agnostic
There simply isn't enough information to declare with certainty our origins or how it all got set in motion
It's ok for a question to remain a question
There is only one meaningful moral tenet
Don't be a dick
Don't do things to others you wouldn't want to have happen to you
As exemplified by
Stop It
You Know Better
I should hope he was Christian. You trying to say he didn't believe in himself?
Edit: This was a joke. Attempting to make it about his self-esteem.
"I hope Jesus believed in himself, he had a lot going for him, it would be really sad if even though he has being the Son of God and all that going on he has so much self-doubt."
To be fair, being a Christian (an actual Christian, not what 99% do and using the term to excuse their opinions and actions) means being like Christ.
So Christ had to be a Christian since it means being like him.
Edit: I wanna add that you can be a Christian without following the religion that exists. Being a Christian boils down to being a good person and helping others.
I always like to hit people with the "what continent was Jesus born on?"
Usually the response is "the middle east", and I follow up with "but what continent?"
Most of the time people either can't answer or say Africa, but Jesus was born in Asia. Jesus was, if real at all, Asian, which the modern Christian can not wrap their head around.
Not a real individual, but a conglomerate of stories compiled by people who had contradictory understandings of history.
A reforming fictional figure of classical Jewish doctrine, but a driver of its veracity, meaning his story still preached the truth of the old testament God, whome he was said to be one with, and was all of the negative things described on the right side of this slide.
Driver of "Love thy neighbor" meaning other people of the Jewish faith and followers of his particular reformation, definitely not gentiles, atheists, etc. All the others were dogs and worthy of burning in hell btw.
Fictional dude who's story says he spit on homeless people to cure them of blindness, despite having all the faculties of a omnipotent being who could have done that shit without spitting on them, but chose to spit directly into a poor bums face just for shits and giggle. Pray to Shiva that Jesus doesn't come up with a cleaver way to cure your rectal cancer with this type of mentality. MOON RIVER.