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"I did not enjoy this interaction with my child, but I am compelled by obligation in both my work life and my home life," is not the wholesome message you think it is.
"I'm not feeling in the mood right now but I am aware that every moment is precious and pushing through this momentary feeling will result in a far greater feeling of happiness for both me and my child into our future when the opportunities to just play together become few and far between."
Sometimes you have to look past the choice of words to see the message being conveyed. The point wasn't that they were dreading playing with their child, it was that despite other factors in their life, they wanted to cherish the moment. And that is the wholesome message you think it is.
I mean you're right, but even if you weren't - it also is an obligation. Having a kid is signing up for way higher highs but also lower lows. Sometimes one of those lows is digging deep and being a good parent when you don't feel like it. It's the price for all the awesome times, like watching them put a new thought together or making you laugh with something completely original. It's also an obligation in the sense that relationships of any type, not just parent child, take work, compromise, and realizing you're not the center of the universe.
Brilliantly said. Chasing those "higher highs" can feel like an obligation at times. But I think it's important to understand that it's a feeling that is coming from yourself and your own deeper needs as a person. And not, as I believe the person I was replying to was thinking, some sort of societal pressure to conform and "do the right thing."
Both interpretations of the word "obligation" are technically correct. But I think that it's one of those things in life where the only way to truly understand the intended interpretation is to have been a parent for yourself. Somehow it can be both a great chore and burden sometimes, but it's one you choose to put upon yourself because the rewards are sooooo worth it.
Selflessness is a virtue.
Then you don't understand yourself or people. It's not always about you. It's about you accepting that shit sucks and people still give a shit about you.
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As a parent myself, I love this. I feel that the single most important thing you can do as a parent is to actively tell (and show) your kids that you love them. Everything else can grow from there.
I think I misunderstood your comment the first time I read it so I deleted my comment.
Wanting to be alone is not the same as not enjoying an interaction. You can have a feeling you enjoy as well as resistance to a feeling and even fear . Heck, you can even have two different feelings. Human condition is very complex especially when arriving to adulthood and concepts about things become more complex. Some people are even afraid of that