Respectability Rule

Then you have a kid and you spend the rest of your life

If kids are creme pies, and kids grow up to be adults, then we are all creampies.
- creampie goblin
- You sure are there, squirt.
- HAH
  
  I'm lab grown
- We are all cream pies on this blessed day
- It's an awkward scary part of our life. Fierce competition. Won by pure luck.
  
  Not long after our first breath of air we start regretting our life choices.
👌👌👌

Socially acceptable, How about this song from the classy 1920s:

"Oh I got nipples on my titties the size of my thumb

I got sumthin' between my legs that'll make a man cum"

I don't remember the last rest of the lyrics but damn what a banger

The magnificent Lucille Bogan

And here's another great one of hers
You left out the part of the lyrics where the man is dead.
- Well, not anymore
- Death by snu snu? Not a bad way to go.
sang by Nicky Minaj
or my girls pussy

https://youtu.be/x359GgVRWaE?si=QuyN9cg28ppj4_ZY
When you're happy, you enjoy the music

When you're sad, you understand the lyrics
- that is so true.

No way! Grown adults have sex when in relationships????

But nuance is lost on people. When you call sick at work due to a stomach bug, do you also graphically describe what's coming from where?

I do when my employer questions my call out.
- If my employer questioned my call out, my next call would be the union rep.
- Great. That's a shit employer and hopefully they'll know better! Depends where you live, but at least here in the UK you don't need a doctor's note for the first 7 days. The employer is not entitled to full information and your sick pay is part of your contract.

Depends on your social circles I guess.

Name a social circle where you can use language like in the first example, and it's acceptable.
- Furry Discord servers
- Friends who are OK talking about and don't shame you about sex. Also friends who have a sense of fucking humor.
- this one
- I know several people in the kink community who would congratulate and be enthusiastically happy for someone who said the first, but would only politely say "congrats" to the second.
- A BDSM munch comes to mind.
- My friends and family say this kind of shit all the time, I'm sorry your life is without humor.
- Furry convention
Half of my former social circle would have found the second version unacceptable

I swear I’ve seen people say stuff like this seriously, is this actually what some people think?

I don’t like kids, but you see some odd reactions from people these days, like on /r/Childfree.

Disliking children is not a personality.

I saw someone describe it as "anti-natalist" which i feel is way more apt. Don't want kids? Child free. Hate people for having children/make up strawmen to grind an axe all the time about it? You're anti-natalist.
Thank you for saying that. I loathe the child free people, and I don't have kids. They're all so stringent!
This is an SNL skit about two gay men trying for a baby: https://youtu.be/v7PYpysL_dI?si=AfIRnvUkFoH2rINu
I saw someone describe it as "anti-natalist" which i feel is way more apt. Want to be child free? You do you. Hate people for having children/make up strawmen to grind an axe all the time about it? You're anti-natalist which is not a compliment or an identity you want to have.
- Anti-natalism is the belief that it's immoral to bring in new sentient beings into the world and isn't inherently bad to be, I'm sure most of them don't attack people who have kids constantly.
This has nothing to do with disliking kids. It's just poking fun at how we euphemise things sometimes.

On another note, I really fucking hate kids lol. I'm so glad I'll never have them. How much I loathe them is nowhere near how obnoxious people get about their kids. They make them their whole personality way more than I ever will make being child free mine.
Pretty sure this is what most people call a joke.

yes that's what euphemisms are for

You can say anything you want to anyone, but there's usually a better way to say it.

I just like that someone is getting laid every night and that is part of their best life. In fact, I assumed the hot messy creampie woman is managing her fertility as she sees fit.

Also jizz is totally a drug. Dopemine, I think.

And yet the doctor tells me I have to stop snorting jizz because it's "bad for my lungs". Like, ok narc smh
- That raises some good questions about how to best absorb dopamine from jizz. I suspect anally is super-effective.
  
  Inhalation of nebulized jizz probably less so, but worth a try.

My wife got pregnant on our first try. Yes, I am that potent.

I love when this post/thought pops up because it just outs people who have no idea how pregnancy works.

What about this is not how pregnancy works, exactly?
- Mostly the "every night" part. There are only about 6 days a month when women can get pregnant iirc. And unless she's getting a random train of dudes, there's pretty significant diminishing returns on repeated loads (not that they hurt, mind you). It's just kind of a childish comparison.
For real. Is the stork just chopped liver?
- And no one mentions the clapping shells!
"people", in this instance, are evidently you, which is ironically why we need more than half-assed sex ed
- Responded above but mostly the "every night" bit. That's not how cycles work. Not saying a woman can't be getting constant creampies but that's not exactly automatic when someone is trying for a baby.
- What's genuinely wrong with this for real though? I'm very confused. I have more than enough sex education.
I like how it outs all the humorless uptight busybodies personally

We live in a susiety.

And when they do get pregnant I'm the asshole for saying "congratulations on your successful ejaculation!"

I'll take girl #1, Pat.

You say: We aren't trying for a baby, but we're not avoiding it either.

I hear: I'm off my birth control and we're raw-dogging like 5 times a day.

Permanently Deleted