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Risa @startrek.website PochoHipster @lemmy.ml 12 mo. ago

Fuck, Marry, Kill

33 comments

What a fucked up and disgusting post.
- Agreed, usually Risa is a pleasant collection of human memes however I find this example to be repugnant.
Having to work really hard to separate my feelings about Guinan from my feelings about Whoopi lately. But even then, Troi, Crusher, Guinan.
- So I was morbidly curious about what you meant, so I looked it up:
  
  Whoopi Goldberg faces a fresh round of backlash after her latest historically inaccurate statement about the Holocaust, which she claimed "wasn't originally" about race in an interview
  
  Fuckin… yikes.
  
  Computer: end program.
  
  The most recent thing is her saying people who are struggling financially just aren’t working hard enough.
  
  And she supports Polanski.
Damn. Tough choice but I have always had a soft spot for crusher. So fuck Troi, kill guinan and marry Beverly
Smart of you, OP, to not include Morn in this because we all know he'd be the only choice for both Fuck and Marry.
Jadzia, Tendi, Bajoran Space Karen.
- Bajoran Space Karen
  
  Killing the Bajoran space Karen in like the free space in Bingo.
Fuck Q, marry Geordi, kill Alexander Rozhenko.
- Fuck Q
  
  Someone's trying to get home quickly.
  
  kill Alexander Rozhenko.
  
  You are without honor!
  
  Someone’s trying to get home quickly.
  
  Remember Ardra, the lady on TNG that pretended to be the actual devil to claim a planet by contract? "I could give you a night that would light fire in your dreams until you die," she offered Picard. Q could actually do that. Forget just shapeshifting into Troi, or dressing up as a prim and proper Englishwoman. Mere cosplay chicanery. Q could give you impossible experiences. Becoming the concept of orgasm. Geometrically impossible positions. Awareness of both bodies at once. The feeling of becoming a nebula and releasing all tension as you dissolve into the universe. Experiences beyond understanding that would shred your pitiful psyche, and you'd say thank you.
  
  You are without honor!
  
  Of course I am. I'm on the internet.
I hear you can probably still get with crusher if she's a ghost. She's into that.

So kill Crusher. Bang Guinan, and marry everyone's favorite empath.
- Are you sure you want a partner who can read your every thought? Also, Guinans got wisdom to doll out for the rest of your life, which will be far shorter than hers, barring unforseen circumstances.
  
  I don't, which is why half betazoid is a nice happy medium. Her mom on the other hand, would definitely not fall into the marry category for me.
Permanently Deleted
In that order. Wouldn't want to spend a lifetime next to a mind reader. Guinan would be a wise, nurturing partner. Most importantly, Guinan can summon spirits and we all know who'd get a kick out of that.
- So you’re saying Guinan will summon Dr Crusher and her boyfriend for a full DnD party right?
Same question, but the characters are Kira, Jadzia and Ezri.
- Fuck Kira, and Jadzia has to die to get Dax to my wife anyway, so . . .
Con I choose 2 to kill?
- Fuck Troi, kill Gainen, kill Crusher, but Crusher comes back as a ghost and we get married.
  
  Edit:
  
  "So... How did you two meet?"
  
  "Funny story, actually..."
  
  Not what I was going for but I now realize it would be taken as worse in my plan
In that order.

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