He’s right. It’s not ready for the masses/ those who aren’t technologically inclined. Afaik ddos protection pretty much breaks federation which is a problem in of itself.
Seems to be a lot of work to be done still
Lemmy and kbin, find a community and stick with it or join a bunch. If you really don't want to use discord for a hangout then there's revolt and guilded for voip clients. You can also try mastodon and matrix, or really a combo of things.
I'm on discord but not for the sociability so much. However, there are some hyper specific subjects that get served up there. Personally, I find it very chaotic.