Please answer.

"Why do we eat the fungi that taste good and not the ones that give you explosive diarrhea?"

Some moulds are totally fine, see blue cheese. Some mycelium schlongs are dangerous, see death caps.
- "Mycelium schlong"
  Linguistic creativity at its best.
- You can also put mold on meat. Lot trickier, but the famous Hungarian salami Téliszalámi (Winter Salami) is done like that.
- See also other soft cheeses like brie

99% of mold gives humans something between mild discomfort and death. The remaining 1% tastes good with butter.
- Not quiet
  98.99% of mold gives humans something between mild discomfort and death, 1% tastes good with butter. The the remaining 0.01% is estimated to have saved over half a billion lives.
  
  And 0.00001% makes me see and feel funny things
  
  Pretty sure the antibiotics also taste good with butter.
  
  And then there are the few lucky people who die a whole lot faster if they take that .01%
- Ah, so there are 3 options- discomfort, death, and nutrition. Therefore, every time you eat a fungus, you have a 1/3 chance of dying. Thanks for the info!
  
  NotHowStatisticsWork
- Or when growing in cheese.
  
  Cheese also tastes good with butter.

Humans: 🤮
Human genitalia: 🍆💨👃🤤

No one:
Everyone: adds a pointless “No one:” above perfectly valid memes
- And on top of that, a pointless Twitter comment.
  I swear, every meme nowadays is three levels of reaction deep.
  
  But how will i drive engagement to my shitter page if i don't slap my username on every meme I find?
- POV: Someone added a useless "no one" to their meme
  
  POV: you're the other person watching someone else do the action being described
- This one grinds my gears too because it doesn't even make sense.
  "No one said nothing" is a double negative. Shouldn't it be
  Everyone:
  
  Or just
  (awkward) silence

The Roquefort (French blue cheese) is made from the mold that grows on rye bread.
So even the moldy bread, in the right condition, can become a delicacy.
- lactobacillus is everywhere. Truly the king of kings.
  
  Yo, thank you to yogurt, sourdough, and various fermented beverages. Bless.
- On typing this out, I'm suddenly concerned about this being offensive or blatantly false. I never applied critical thought to the story before, as I'm pretty sure I was told it as a relatively young, and more relevantly gullible, man.
  Is it true that this mold played a role in the "witches ride broomsticks" stereotype?
  edit: Removed redundant word.
  
  It sounds like a few different things got mashed together there. Ergot is a hallucinogenic fungus that grows on rye, and is speculated to be the cause of some of the witch panics. It's not the same fungus found in Roquefort, but it is what they use to make LSD.
  Witches flying is hypothesized to be entheogen use, since a common side effect is feelings of floating, flying, or otherwise 'being high'.
  
  The fungus you're thinking of is likely ergot, because it shows up in pretty large volume in batches of rye.
  In processing, it ends up as a dark purple/black dried up mass that assumes kinda a crescent shape. Mills will run a batch of rye through a color-sorter - a bunch of times consecutively - to reduce the amount of ergot in the batch before milling.
  You can technically refine it into LSD, but if you screw up, you can kill people. (Morning Glories are the preferred method).
  The number of 55-gallon drums of ergot I've disposed of, though... It's difficult not to identify with Walter White and wonder... "what if?"

Most molds are about as closely related to mushrooms as flatworms are to humans
- Not to be confused with ringworms which are, in fact, a mold.
  
  Or slime molds which are, in fact, an ameoba.
- And humans are more closely related to mushrooms than plants!

"why is that we eat the fruit and not the tree?"
- Cinnamon
  
  Maple syrup
- Why apple but not apple seed
  
  i eat the apple seeds, coward
  dies

Both are pictures of genitalia, one of them is just really really small, microscopic even, so you are being very insensitive towards the microscopic genitalia.
- It doesn't need to be big to do it's job!😡
- I feel seen

Whoa there... We eat mold too if they're the right type and on the right things.
- Blu cheese has entered the chat

Blue cheese would like a word.

Wait I thought mushrooms were the flowers... Or are you telling me that flowers are also genitals??!! 💥
- Flowers are flowers genitals as well.
  
  So they're manspreading
- Yep lol just wait till you find out what pollen is analogous too lol
  
  So bees are slutty sex pests and fly around covered in plant cum...
- Poppycock.

This bacterium gives me the sniffles. This other bacterium liquefies and eats my muscles. But if I don't have enough of this other bacterium in me, I get violent explosive shits??

the difference between eating mushrooms and eating mold is the difference between oral sex and vore
- Wait am I supposed to just motion the mushroom in and out repeatedly then once it shrivels, the job is done?

If the french eat frogs that's fine, but when the south Americans do it everyone loses their minds.
(Poison dart frogs)

Cheese and yoghurt enter the chat.
- laughs in alcohol

I prefer calling it flowers than genitallia
- Some women also call it their flowers and yeah I go down on flowers. :finger-guns:
- tomato tomato

Srsly? It's pretty simple - some forms of mold are delicious and others aren't.
Here's another mystery to ponder: Why do people generally love having sex but hate doing housework that involves the same amount of effort? Have fun.
- There's housework that involves lying down while someone else puts in all the effort?
  
  Ya it’s called affording a maid

Kombucha and sourdough bread have now entered the chat.
- My babies! Also don't forget kefir, my third child.

basically the same thing with men
- Not a big fan of male genitalia tbh
- vanilla

.....is bread mold harmful to eat?
EDIT: Still have not gotten a wholly confirmed answer lol
- Fuck, I remember Gumby. What happened to that guy?
  
  I dunno. I miss him, though.. and his pony pal Pokey, too.
  
  Apparently, it's being rebooted as a cartoon.
  Not even a 3d one? People have already mimicked stop motion in cgi.
  
  For a costume event, I got a Gumby outfit and put a gladiator shirt over it. I don't think anybody got it.
- If you keep eating it, you'll have to change your name to ShartEatingBreakfast
  
  Does it make your guts rumble, fr??
- Depends on the species of mold, but enough of them are toxic that the general advice is to avoid all moldy bread.
- Bread mold is not one universal thing, while certain molds may be more common, without doing involved identification you will not be able to determine the species and therefore safety of bread mold. Even if the majority of the time it is a safe species, you should not be knowingly risking it.
- It's as harmful as picking up a random bug and eating it.
  Which means: you might die. Or you might not.
  Trusting the internet to give you the answer here as the final defacto answer... Maybe not the best.
  
  Sorry, my plethora of mycologist friends are non-existent.
  I go to Lemmy to get crowd-sourced information from people's personal experiences. From the looks of it, people are saying "yeah maybe don't do that. Risky." I'll believe them! Amd the reasoning behind them seems sound, as well.
  Better than asking bots on F×cebook or whatnot.
- SEB is a 32 year old woman, presenting to the emergency room...
  
  Listen: I've never gotten sick from eating slightly moldy bread. Ever.
  Scallions, however, sent me to the emergency room shitting blood (turns out it was an allergy or intolerance or some nonsense).
  I ain't one of those "Taco Bell gives me explosive diarrhea" nerds. That's weak. 😤

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_famines

I’ve been sucking off genitalia this whole time?!
- You should try mushrooms, they're delicious too.
  
  I’ll give it a try. Got any recipes?

"Has entered the chat" has entered the chat. Itt

"mould" vs "would"
- Would mould live on live wood?
  Stupid language (it's the only one I speak)

Peniciline

What’s mould? I know what mold is.
Edit: you can all eat the additional U
- American English (derogatory)
- haha the joke is that we all have to live under the thumb of imperial domination and its demands for conformity while you have the privilege of being from the metropole