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[✓] Small Pox

[✓] Murder Hornets

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We're almost there, humanity!

War against Murder CEOs remains unresolved.

I'd just like to thank everyone for doing their part, posting, reposting, and fear mongering it.

Would have been solved much quicker if they where ceo killing hornets

America and its "wars against...."

America hasn't won any war since WWII, and that includes wars against drugs, countries, people, religions, etc. I highly doubt they won this one. I remember "mission accomplished"

Yeah sure "murder hornets". Like "murder japs", "murder communists", "murder vietnamese", "murder gays", "murder blacks" or "murder arabs" before. I think I'll hold off celebrating until I know how much oil those hornets had in stock.

“Yeah, yeah, we’re totally eradicated. All is now fine, there’s nothing to worry about. Sleep well!” - Sneaky Murder Hornet.

Uhh, first win since WW2. Congrats.

Article written by Dr. M. Horneté

(camera focuses on the news playing on a TV in a home in the countryside, slowly pulling back away from the monitor)

"...thanks to their efforts, experts have now stated with certainty that this threat has been eradicated..."

(the camera has pulled back enough that the screen is framed by an outside window with a tree trunk coming into frame from the right)

"...and many communities in the northwest united states can breathe easier knowing that these dreaded hornets are no longer found on our shores. Reporting from Seattle..."

(focus shifts to the tree bark. Buzzing is heard, getting louder and louder until a single murder hornet queen lands on the tree. Cut to black. Roll credits)

Hey hey, the US actually won a war! Been a long time coming..

Whew. Looks like the feds didn't find the colony of buzzy buddies I've been nurturing in the suburbs.

Can't wait for spring!

Now you gotta send help to Australia. Those damned emus are a worthy adversary.

finally some good fucking food...

Anybody know where i can get some murder hornets from? (i jest, ofc)

shitposting aside, how rare is it that invasive species are eradicated before becoming a problem? Can't be that common.

Until the next ones arrive on another ship

George Bush "Mission Accomplished" or...

It was wild seeing researchers bait them with Meat and tie flags to them, but the fact that this strategy actually worked longterm is beyond wild.

It sounds stupid but I really want to imagine China was behind all this as a test run of bio warfare via invasive species and there's just some random CCP agent going Rats! We've been foiled again. Start dumping more corn syrup into our honey exports!

Too bad.

They really didn't go with homicidal hornets? We actin' like fun alliterations just come around all the time now?

braaaap suspiciously murder hornet shaped stomach

Same kind of win as with the war in Afghanistan ?