Girls don’t break wind, they shatter it, and that’s why they’re breathtaking. That’s what my grandfather always used to say, until my grandmother stabbed him to death during a mental episode. Would have been funny if she suffocated him, but she didn’t seem to consider my need for irony
This was not a comment I expected to read on this post
Still a better love story than Twilight.
I hope it's because she ate an onion-heavy dish🥰
Bro what
Onions are good AND good for you! Sure, they fuel a low-to-medium risk biological agent when digested in sufficient quantities, but it's still better than eggy farts!:)))
I wish she would come and fart in my bed instead
I knew he was the one when we started laughing at eachother's nighttime farts.
My girlfriend said she knew when I opened the shower curtain and used my dick as a catapult to launch water at her.
Relationship goals
Farting *then lifting the edge of the duvet for a quick huff
Like hell I’m going to let the girl of my dreams outfart me. The bedroom is going to be a hazmat crisis before I relent!
And that's fine.
The girl of my dreams doesn’t know how to remove oligosaccharides making food 🤔
One time my wife farted herself awake, you can't not laugh at that
you’d be noseblind after a while so go for it
I have a deviated septum and therefore almost no effective sense of smell.
I have it on good authority that those around me have taken advantage of this on many occasions.
I would be as well, but I have to settle for farting at work at this moment.
I can fix her
